Am I not desirable?

[Anonymous]

I have been with this guy for a year and he has only given me oral sex once when he was a little drunk. Then again I don't ask for it much. But I assume he would just do it. He asks me all the time. Point blank is he cheated on me and gave oral sex right away. Am I not desirable? Why take forever to pleasure the one you love most and turn around on a 1 night stand and do it right away with a complete stranger? Guys please help me out here. I think oral sex is personal and should be shared with someone you love not on a 1 night stand.

[twistedmartini]

I'll skip the "why are still with someone who cheated on you and then told you the details" part because your sex issue will probably come up again.

You have a major communications problem. When you ASSUME, you make an ASS out of You and ME. Never assume. If it hasn't been said, it hasn't been communicated and he isn't responsible. Same goes for you. If you want something, ask. If you don't like something, say so. Not just in the bedroom but everywhere. I always ask girlfriends if there is anything they really like or if they have any fantasies that they would like to try. I don't want to leave things to chance. If chance worked that ticket I bought for the $200 million Mega Millions lottery would have been a winner and I'd be writing this in my Gulfstream.

If you ask and he still isn't playing down there it could be a few things. He just might not care about you. He might be too stupid to want to please his lover. Or it could be a hygiene issue. Ask and don't be hurt by his response. Maybe there's a bad smell. This has happened to me a couple of times and is a major turn off. Could be bacterial. Your gyn can fix that for you. Maybe you need to wash before sex. Are you well manicured? A huge tangled, goopy mess isn't exactly inviting. Think of it as a restaurant. If you walked into a place that wasn't nice and clean and neat would sit down and eat?

[Asker]

I don't have an issue in that area. He is the only partner I have had that has been like that.

[Suave-Man]

How do you know he had oral sex when he cheated? Was he like, "yes, I cheated on you and I gave her oral sex and not you, which I know you've been wanting. " In any case, he might not have liked the taste of you (hate to say it) but it happens. Okay "point blank" just ask the kid, "why don't you suck my pussy? " "(his answer)" "Ha okay now get the f*** out my house! " Problem solved. Neexxtt!

[redheadgirl520]

Girl! You need to get rid of this LOSER! He is a selfish cheater! What are you still doing with him? I don't understand why you aren't completely ignoring him by this point. First of all, by being selfish in bed; he shows that he lacks any kind of regard for your pleasure and fulfillment. And by cheating on you, he lacks respect for YOU! Honey. Respect yourself and dump the dude! And make sure that when you do, you tell him exactly why. Why are you wasting time with him when you could be enriching your own life?

Girl power!

[frgspad]

Why are you still with him if he cheated on you? That tells him that you are ok with the cheating and the lame sex. If he's doing his best to get ANOTHER girl off and doing nothing for you then that should show you how he really feels about you.

[Asker]

I am not with him anymore.

[Jarett]

The fact is, is that you're with a selfish guy. Any guy that always wants to get sucked and doesn't give back is selfish. The fact that he cheated on you proves the point. Ditch the loser, you deserve someone better!

[johnsmith2116]

It sounds like he is selfish and doesn't care about pleasing you. You may want to consider whether it's worth it for you to stay in that relationship.

[jjk006]

He is a very selfish guy indeed as Jarett said. Why he did it for his 1 night stand I don't know but maybe he did just to get with the other girl I don't know but he sucks! You deserve someone better. Totally agree with jarett.

[oldschool]

How old is he? And you? I think most older guys will be more committed to one women. I thought most guys loved giving oral sex to a women. Maybe he isn't totally into you, or maybe there's not enough sex in your relationship.