Can't give blowjobs anymore without awful TMJ pain. Would this ruin my sex life with a guy?

I have an awful problem. I completely love giving blowjobs. With my last partner, I gave him at least a bj everyday or as much as possible because it turned me on so much, even more than having him eat me out. Anyways, I recently got tmj in my jaw from a horsebackriding fall and I can barely open my mouth an inch without it popping extremely loud. I Haven't tried giving another bj yet but I almost full out cried when I realized that I won't be able to give one without feeling awful pain. I'm comfortable with pulling and scratching and other ruff sex but my jaw is something different. Can any guy please tell me if it would be a huge factor that would ruin sex life. I love giving head and I wouldn't want a guy to think I'm making an excuse. But honestly, the jaw popping and pain is just unattractive. Thanks boys! :)
Updates:
+1 y
Oh btw! I do have larger breasts so I'm always up for titty jobs BUT I always assumed that getting a bj was a pride thing with guys
+1 y
My tmj/tmd is a dislocation in a jaw that create a loud popping noise when I open my mouth too wide and sometimes I will get pain wisdom teeth removal like if I open it too fast or too long. Such a depressing subject. I'll def miss the good old bj giving days!
0 1

Most Helpful Girls

  • I'm not a guy, but I have worked for years as a certified dental assistant to a dentist who specialises in TMJ. (TMJ or TMD refers to temporomandibular joint disorder...jaw joint pain and or clicking and or ear pain/tinnitus due to damaged ligaments in the joint)

    A bad case of tmj due to injury generally just isn't considered "fixable" as in surgery etc like you would go to the doc and just "fix" a broken bone or torn tissue...no one operates on the tmj, except maybe in some completely rare extreme circumstance...in all the 1000s of people I saw with tmj over the past 12 years, I never met anyone who had surgery on their tmj. Sometimes they had surgery to lengthen or shorten the maxilla or mandible to correct a bad bite, but never on the joint itself.

    The best thing is to treat it like you would a bad back: try your best not to aggravate it, don't get into the habit of clicking it on purpose or worrying at it, be accepting that you will have good weeks and bad weeks with the pain, during bad weeks, take it easy on the chewy steak and so forth. Get a GOOD bite guard or "splint" from a dentist who specialises in such things...I've seen some pretty grim work by dentists in this particular area when they don't know wtf they are doing...a bad appliance will make the jaw worse. Chewy ones don't seem to work as well as hard ones when it comes to nightguards. Store-bought ones are usually grim and don't usually work. Wear the guard you get (if it works for you) as much as possible...not just at night. De-stress as much as you can, especially b4 bed (teeth grinding time)... and try things like massage and acupuncture and chiro if they are your thing. Braces to fix a bad bite can do wonders for your tmj (this improved my own problems immeasurably, btw)

    I would recommend re bj's, do a "mini" bj as part of the overall sex experience. If you take a couple of advils before sex and give em 45 min to kick in, then hopefully you will be relaxed enough to be able to do a minute or two of bj-ing as foreplay, or during the middle of sex, or right at the point of climax.

    I too have tmj and experienced the same bj issue as you! And bj's ain't really something you wanna specifically bring up at the dentist's...lol! Hope this helps...

  • Ugh. I feel your pain. Maybe just do it for a bit to mix it up? Or maybe just try doing some jaw exercises or something? From my experience I think guys prefer to come from sex anyway, so maybe just start with a bj and then finish with sex? How bad is the jaw?

    • I fell off my horse pretty hard. If you've ever gotten your wisdom teeth out. It feels like that if I open my mouth too long. Such a sad thing :( goodbye sex life!

  • I have TMJ as well. Hasn't your dentist talked to you about what you can do? I clench my teeth at night, so I wear a mouth guard when I sleep, and it reduces the pain immensely. I had one molded specifically for my teeth during a dentist appointment.

    • Yeah, sadly I go to physical therapy, chiro, bite plane, and sports mouth guard. Wish I could wear a mouth guard while giving head hahaha yeah that would not go over well hahahaha!

Most Helpful Guys

  • How do you know, for certain, you have TMJ? A good dentist is likely going to be able to solve that problem. They are trained to solve more problems than drilling out cavities.

    "He or she will examine your temporomandibular joints for pain or tenderness; listen for clicking, popping, or grating sounds during jaw movement; look for limited motion or locking of the jaw while opening or closing the mouth; and examine bite and facial muscle function. Sometimes panoramic X-rays will be taken. These full face X-rays allow your dentist to view the entire jaws, TMJ, and teeth to make sure other problems aren't causing the TMD symptoms. Sometimes other imaging tests, such as magnetic resonance imaging (MRI) or a computer tomography (CT), are needed. The MRI views the soft tissue such as the TMJ disc to see if it is in the proper position as the jaw moves. A CT scan helps view the bony detail of the joint.

    Your dentist may decide to send you to an oral surgeon (also called an oral and maxillofacial surgeon) for further care and treatment. This oral health care professional specializes in surgical procedures in and about the entire face, mouth, and jaw area."

    from: link

    • Because I've been to two dentists and an orthopedic surgeon has me in the chiro office 4 times a week and physical therapy. In addition I have a bite plane for sleep and a mouthguard for horse riding. Tmj can't just go away. Only suppressed. Surgeries are not wise to receive because over 75% of the surgeries do not work or can worsen the jaw. It's not like I'm not trying to get rid of my problem. I am quite educated on what happened when I fell off my horse and made my jaw alignment off :P

    • Hmmm, from what I read TMJ is fixable. I think you have not yet found the right doctor who has the skill to fix your problem. Do a Google search on finding a good TMJ specialist.

  • Hey Anon girl,

    Not with all guys, but of course most of us enjoy it.

    In all honesty, if you're with a guy who cares about you, he will understand and accomodate this. If it IS a deal breaker in a relationship, he'd be pretty insensitive and uncaring.

    Maybe it will heal and in a few months won't be an issue, anyway. (I'm not sure exactly what tmj is)

    The guys below are right - a BJ is nice, but not a massive 'pride thing' and in many relationships it's not that common. Most nice guys will want many other things in a relationship than just great BJ's.

    I like to give oral ten times more than receiving it for example...

    Besides, you can still tease a guy's penis with your lips and tongue. Deep throating isn't the be all and end all of fellatio.

    Good luck!

    • Thanks :) this helped me feel a lot better!

Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions

What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!

What Girls & Guys Said

0 5
  • Patience is better then pride, if she says it hurts, I can wait. As long as she has baby oil or some form of lube and gives a HJ for awhile instead of a BJ for awhile, I wouldn't mind at all. To top it all of its my girlfriend, not my sex slave, so I'm sure I can manage not doing sexual things for a bit because of her health condition. Not the end of the world , Hjs aren't that bad , so I would suggest giving him a lot or just regular sex to make up for that accident. Sorry to hear btw.

  • Wouldn't be a problem at all, besides not all girls like going down there anyway. there's more to love making than bj's ;)

    • Soooooo true. Thank the lord my sex life won't go down the drain!

  • I would understand if I met a girl that couldn't give a blowjob because of a medical reason. I am sure that most guys will understand. I don't think this will be a problem in any relationship you have. Maybe you could change your style, and just use your tongue to lick him or something.

    • It is not a pride thing, for me. It just feels good. There is plenty you can do, to make your man feel good.

  • I won't ruin your sex life, but it will ruin your blowjobs. Just be straight-up about it. Explain what TMJ is, and why it would give you blowjob problems. No decent guy will fault you for it.

  • Last relationship I was in I rarely ever got it one so with me you would be fine.

    • hmm...Even tho I've titty f***ed a pair of d's I didn't find it to assuming but for guys that'll do.