Does anyone else feel they missed out on a lot of sex and fun?

I'm 24 and still a virgin. And I studied hard in school and joined the Army 4 at 18 for 6 years. I never got to party hang out with girls and get wasted like all my friends did. I feel I missed out on a lot. What about you?
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Most Helpful Girls

  • Sometimes we think we have missed out on something just because everyone has experienced the things you are "supposed" to when you are at a certain age. Sometimes those things can be fun and others not so much even though you are told they are and when you get there it's not that great.

    I guess it depends on the type of person you are or what kind of things you enjoy. I believe if you are still a virgin (if that is what's bothering you) that there is nothing wrong with that. I have a hard time believing that certain guys at certain ages are still virgins because some guys have lied about it or about how many people they have been with. But if you are a virgin there is nothing wrong with that. I believe you should wait til you find someone worth doing it with who is understanding and loving. =)

    Yeah, you could do it with just about anyone but it doesn't mean as much. Some guys don't care and just want to get it over with but some do care. So I think that you should wait to find someone worth doing it with. It will be your first time after all. =)

    Might as well make it some what special. lol. Partying can be fun but eventually you reach a point where it's just like what matters more in life. Not saying it's wrong to party or whatever because it's a great way to let loose and have fun but it's not everything. You're not old. You still have time to go out have fun and party =) Don't worry about it.

  • I did a bunch of crazy sh*t like that and it's not really all that interesting. I also studied my brains out and got a good job and worked a lot. So, after burning the candle at both ends, I can say that, really, most of it is just wasting time. Building a real social support network and learning how to be self-sufficient are the most valuable things in life, and really, the most emancipating. There isn't any freedom in partying, the way that a lot of people have you believe. It's mostly a pastime and gets pretty yawn-worthy. Plus, being broke and feeling like sh*t all the time gets old fast. What you did gave you some real faith in your own abilities, so get out there and do what you think will make your life happy and productive.

    • Thanks.

    • I second you I was never the party going type in high school but I tried when I got into colleges after two weekends I was tiered of it, its just the same thing over and over and over again, so f*** it I have more fun setting up a small poker game with friends or going dancing with the GF

    • I can vouch that I partied my ass off in high school, college and beyond. It was fun, but not any more fun than other things I like: good movies, writing, books, friends and family. etc. Despite being moderately "popular", what I really pined for in college is fitting in with the "artsy" and "cultured" kids that I met. I don't mean that they were any better, either ... just that finding your own sense of self and activities you enjoy is very personal, despite what bros and beer ads say.

  • U did NOT miss out you got your foundation for life set up - lot of people hang out and NEVER get anything accomplished in life NOW you have that all under your belt AND so you will be in a better work position and hve a better life... You have plenty of LIFE to "get wasted" - which is over rated... You are young still NOW you can hang out party, and date - as you got other things done in your life the people hanging may NOT have gotten ANYTHING accomplished in life.. So be happy you are DOING what you are SUPPOSED to do... Cheers you made GOOD choices!

    • +1.

Most Helpful Guys

  • Know that feel bro, in high school I had friends but no real friends (real friends hang out with you and stuff), and I was never invied to a party. No girlfriend, nothing. And on summer everyone would go to lake or hangout but all I could do was go to football practice and play videogames or read. So I lived a very boring life.

    After my first year of college, things aren't much better. It doesn't help that I'm in engineering so I just do schoolwork after my classes.

    It sucks because these are supposed to be "The best years of your life" and if that statement is true, my life is going to unadventerous and will suck.

    Every dude I know goes to parties, get drunk, and do awesome things like skinny dip with a group of girls and such, and I haven't done any of that so I haven't accomplished anthing in life.

    Oh well, guess ill just finish college, get a job, and work till I die.

  • I was in the marine corps, I've done my tours, I've been around, and nope I don't feel like I've missed out on life.

    Look man, go out there by yourself. That's how I do it, go to the clubs, bars by yourself. its more fun and chances of you getting laid would be high. The truth is a majority of the ladies at night are alone, and one is bound to go with you.

    • your 95 and don't feel you'v missed out on life?

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What Girls & Guys Said

3 12
  • I guess it depends on your priorities in life. Not all of us like partying, or getting wasted or that kinda lifestyle. I don't feel like I miss out at all. I look at some of my friends and then I just think "thank goodness I'm not like them".

  • Well I had, fun but not as much fun as I could have.

    For one, I was serious about like like yourself. I wasn't one of those kids that viewed college as a giant party. I was there to get a degree and the parting was a bonus.

    I also had higher standards of my sex life. I never was nor have been someone who has been up for random casual sex. Even if I try to change that, I can't. It just goes against my wiring.

    Finally, I would consider myself a slight late bloomer in terms of social skills. I was never awkward. I had friends and GF's. I just wasn't exactly a social butterfly or a ladies man. Looking back in high school and even most of college, I laugh at how pathetic and uneducated I was in terms of social dynamics and gaming women. I've also learned a lot in the last few years since taking a more active role in improving my life. Had I known what I know now back in high school. Things would have been much different.

  • Perspective is everything. Chances are, in those 6 years in the army, you've been places, seen things, done things that your friends never will. Those things have much deeper value. The most successful people didn't waste years partying and getting drunk so in the scheme of things you're ahead in life. That's no bad thing.

  • You're still pretty young.

    You've missed some experiences, but what you're mainly lacking is skills. Just don't let the next 10 years slip away.

  • Depends how you spent your time. Were you video gaming? If yes, yes you did.

    • No like I said I was studying and deployed alot.

    • I know a lot of smart nerds that studied hard in HS and spent the rest of their time playing video games. Noone studies for 6 hours a day.

    • No iv never been big on video games. I was much more into shooting weapons in real life that's why I joined the army at 18 (among other reasons obviously)

  • You still have time mate, get out there and find some p**** who has friends that like troilism. party and paly hard, my days are long gone Utrinque Paratus.

  • Yeah you missed a TON. Alcohol poisoning, condoms breaking, getting booked. Damn child. Seriously, don't dwell. There's plenty of time for fun, you're only 24.

  • Definetely, but the good news is that you can still catch up.

  • You must have been that strange guy no one else in the squad liked. Otherwise you would have went to all the partys, got laid and had fun

    • Dude I was an infantryman its all guys there. Its a sausage fest.

    • Dude you were an infantryman. Which means you should have partied like crazy whenever you had the chance. Everyone else I've ever heard of had tons of fun while they were in, cleary you sid it wrong.

    • I was really shy. And no girls ever paid attention to me.

  • Yes you missed out on a lot of fun partying and wild girls. Topless drunk girls, strip poker, random guys and girls hooking up. :) Sorry wrong guy to answer your question.

  • yeah I wonder too because I'm 22 and still a virgin, I've heard that the physical pleasurable feeling of sex will not feel as good, as great during our 30's, 40's, then it was in our 20's and teens

  • I do feel this way a lot, especially now in late 30's with a very nice wife and two kids. In my 20's I thought if I work hard life will be better later since it is like an investment. I convinced myself that delayed gratification is a good thing and I should focus on creating a stable future- that turned out to be true financially but not emotionally.

    I now have a great job which pays well, so that part worked out. On the other hand, I'm in a sexless marriage (scheduled, so yes pretty boring). My wife grew up wealthy and was able to experience lots of sex and fun and exploring her interests. I had a poor upbringing and my family moved around a lot so I focused on school and did not have the means to do much since I worked 40-60 hours per week then went to evening school. Shortly after marriage my wife insisted she loves me but wants to be authentic to herself so she does not have sex with me more than once a month, despite how I told her it is important to me. Intimacy dwindled after that since all our conversations are small talk; my wife is pretty content with how things are but I am not. I want intimacy and sex real bad but I'm not getting much.

    Based on the way my life turned out, I believe each stage in life has its own pursuits. Early 20's is for sex and friends, 30's is for career and family, etc. I wish I could go back in time and have more sex and do more fun things for myself. Also, you have limited time and resources so investing too much in one area like I did means you will probably end up sacrificing other areas.

    This issue is obviously too complex to summarize in a thread like this. But I figured maybe you knowing how my life turned out can be helpful.

  • Dude I'm in my thirties and still avirgin. I had a pretty shitty time growing up from childhood, adolescence, even adulthood. I suffered from social anxiety disorder so nevermind approaching women but just even going out was bad enough. People don't realise what a curse it is. I never gave it much thought in my twenties because I was too busy concentrating about curing my anxiety disorder but now that I'm pretty much out of it so-to-speak, but my sexual frustration all of a sudden in my thirties just went through the roof and it hurts like hell cause not only have I lost my youth feeling like I've been in a coma for years. I've lost opportunites and possible companionship which is what I long for most.

  • Yes, you did, but no use crying over spilled milk. If you were now dead, then you'd be seriously missing out on stuff.

  • You don't have to lose your virginity because you're 24. Wait until your married, then your first experience will be with someone you truly love.