Does sex with the same person get boring?

I'm only 18 and I've never been married or in a long term relationship(5+ years) so I always wonder, doesn't it get boring? It's one of the reasons I'm kind of nervous and not so keen on marriage(besides other things). I mean, doesn't it drive you to cheat? I'm NOT justifying cheating at all, but, I honestly can't imagine myself being with the same person for 10 years+ and not getting bored. I would NEVER cheat, but in my 18 year old mind, it's unfathomable. Hell, even thinking about a 3 year relationship leaves me kind of curious I know sex isn't anything, but it is something and it is important to the relationship. Granted, I think a couple should wait as long as they need to both be ready for sex(within a reasonable time period), because they'd have their whole lives to have sex. Can anyone offer insight?
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Most Helpful Girls

  • I've been in a relationship that lasted 5 years, and been in my current relationship for 6 years. That said, I can't really speak for what it's like to be in a sexual relationship with the same person for 10+ years.

    In my experience, just as relationships go through a "honeymoon" stage, the sexual aspect of a relationship does too. In the beginning, everything is new and exciting. You get turned on by your partner just looking at you in a certain way. You want to have sex with that person every chance you get.

    When you've been together for a long time, what was once new and exciting becomes the "norm"; it can take more to get turned on. Whereas in the beginning of my relationship, I would get turned on by just sitting close to my partner, hugging him, or seeing him naked---these are things that we do all the time and have been doing for years. Now, while I sometimes still get turned on by the little things, often I require more foreplay. Also, in the beginning of our relationship, we were both students and we had a lot more free time, now that we work full-time, work opposite shifts, and have additional responsibilities and stresses, sometimes these things can get in the way of having sex multiple times a day as we did in the beginning. I imagine that having children, for example, would compound this greatly.

    That said, whether or not sex becomes "boring" depends on the relationship and the people involved. If either you or your partner are the type of people who aren't into experimenting, it might mean that your sex life hasn't evolved very much and you've been having the same type of sex for years. If the two of you are adventurous, imaginative, open-minded, and have good communication, you're going to be coming up and trying out new things, so sex isn't going to feel monotonous. Sex with someone that you know very well and have a high degree of trust in can also mean that you can become very in tune with each other (know what the right buttons to push are) and feel more comfortable talking about and acting out your desires.

    My sex life with my partner isn't the same as it was initially, but it's still great. We still have sex regularly, we're still very attracted to each other, sex is extremely pleasurable and we have a lot of fun with it.

  • All I can say is that it takes two people to make a relationship what it is. It can not be put on one person to carry the burdens of everything while the other person makes no effort to try. It's a balance of sorts.

    The same thing applies to what you are asking. Yes, it can be but it can always be more interesting or exciting if both people try. Of course one can initiate and try to be more creative/romantic in that area but the other person has to be willing to do the same or be open to such ideas. You can't do it on your own. If you are willing to make the effort more than likely the other person will too.

  • Sometimes, but learning to accept that it will be boring and exciting in waves is key to a long relationship. There are about a million variations to having sex, especially when you take in different positions, locations, toys, lubricans/creams, role playing, etc. Most people get bored because they refuse to get out of comfortable patterns, or they don't trust their lover enough to try new things out without fear of rejection/judgement. Establish healthy communication about sex, stay in good shape... and you will have healthy sex.

    • I guess accepting that it will be boring is something that comes with maturity then. I'm young, so I guess it's normal for me to consider it 'scary' But yeah, communication is something I would prioritize to keep us both happy

    • Yeah, life is weird like that. We tend to grow when we need to grow.

Most Helpful Guys



  • Well, if you eat the same food every day, you will eventually get bored of it and not want to eat it again. That's why you eat something different every once in a while.

    I am not suggesting that one should cheat every once in a while. That is not what I mean with different food. I'm suggesting "spicing things up", by doing something different, or bringing new elements to the sex life.

    Being adventurous and open-minded can keep things exciting for much longer than they normally would be.

  • Yes, it can get boring, but you can also spice it up. And, believe it or not, you will probably feel differently when you get older and get into a committed relationship or marriage. You can enjoy sex for the relationship too. Don't worry about it yet.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Nope. I've been with my guy for 3 years and the sex is still great. Every so often though we'll switch things up. Try different positions, new locations, and different techniques. It's fun and interesting to find new things that drive your partner crazy in bed. It keeps it all exciting:)

  • You need to put effort in.

    If that doesn't happen, it gets boring.

    Or, equally common, so infrequent its hard to find it boring.

    • infrequently sounds like another great driving factor to divorce

    • Sex and money are the main reasons.

  • Not sure if I would use the word boring...but...some of the excitement and passion goes away...o.O

    • what happens when some of the excitement and passion goes away? Also, I know you have a 'fetish' so I have to ask, has your interest in it diminished or does it still excite you the way it did 15 years ago?

    • Well the first 3-5 years are the honeymoon years...or...at least they should be...although obviously that is not the case for these marriages that last 1-5 years..my wife's brother was married for 13 days...that whole concept of the 7-year-itch is not completely without basis...couples really need to not start taking each other for granted in that 7 to 10 year stretch..and personality compatibility is under discussed..none of it is any good if cannot live together...(:(:(:

    • Oh...second question...LOL! Well..my needs have not changed so my "fetish"..as you put it is my number one activity followed right behind by my other fixation-->giving oral...and yes interest has diminished in both..as has regular sex...but has disappeared and have done both recently!...<3<3<3=D

  • It does get boring from time to time, but its always easier. You don't have to worry about trying to impress the other person, so it can be better in a lot of ways

  • It definitely can get boring, but if you either space it out & try new positions you can still preserve some excitement.

  • I don't know, no one want have sex with me. :/

  • not boring but the excitement can fade, unless you keep working on changing things up from time to time

  • It can do, but there are things that both partners can do to keep things interesting.