Girl in bed acts like a dead fish?

[Anonymous]

Maybe it's the kind of girls that I attract, but I have a problem with girls not doing anything in the bedroom. They literally do nothing to help me out. I ask what they like, but they're too shy to tell me. I don't know if it's that I'm not pleasing them, but they'll just lay there. Once one of them pulled me in closer hen I was getting it right, then went back to pretty much laying flat. How can I tell a girl that she needs to do more in bed without hurting her feelings? The last time I tried, I apparently struck a cord and took it back.

[pepper01]

maybe you are boring in bed anf they just want to get it over with. sex is a 2 person act so they can get their vibe from you. personally I always communicate with my boyfriend and I help him out in ALL the positions we do. sex is a partnership and both have to give 50/50. I only say maybe its you because you said its with every girl you are with or most of them

[Asker]

At lest I'm trying to do something. There was no effort on their part or communication that something I was doing was wrong. In fact it was the opposite.

[pepper01]

i have to disagree that inexperienced girls don't know how to communicate. I recently lost my virginity and I have ALWAYS communicated from day one and I still do! it depends on the girl. some are more verbal than others of course. I think its mostly they don't want to hurt the guys feelings majority of the time or don't know what they like

[Asker]

Ok, well I'm more of the opinion that if a guy explicitly asks what's working or not working, that's your cue to be brutally honest. Otherwise, it's unfair to hold him accountable when he's done his part.

[Anonymous]

are you really bad or awkward and they don't know what to do...?

[Asker]

I'm moderately inexperienced because I don't like sex outside of relationships. However, some of the girls I've been with have taken more of a lead than others. Most though, didn't do anything.

[Asker]

Also, one would claim that I was doing great when I asked how I was doing. I heard her breathe kinda weird, so I wanted to make sure she was okay. But she's never return the favor, so to speak. She'd say "you knocked me out" or "I'm too tired."

[Opinion Owner]

are you sleeping with inexperienced girls?

[Asker]

Well, one of these was more experienced than I was, but pretended to be a virgin. I.E. she was an "everything but" virgin, but I was a Just kissing/ virgin virgin. It was frustrating, because she'd tell me stories about her hooking up with guys. But she'd hardly do anything in the sack. She was a good kisser, I'll give her that much. But that was where her expertise ended... I think another one was equally inexperienced as I was, at the time.

[AndiArthropod]

Some girls think if they help you out they'll do it wrong or look foolish. I used to feel that way when I was inexperienced. Something that helped me was to get on top. Then the guy was the one helping me out. Maybe that could help.

[Asker]

I'll have to try that one of the 2 girls that did it would never be on top.

[AndiArthropod]

I hope it helps and I hope the other girl can be more confident :)

[Asker]

thanks!

[AndiArthropod]

No problem

[britannny]

Some girls are just shy... It probably has nothing to do with whether they're in to you or not. Maybe they're just really inexperienced, and aren't really quite comfortable having sex.

[Asker]

I can understand that, I guess. But, how do I get her to feel more comfortable? Even though I'm not super experienced, and I'm more of a relationship guy, I won't judge someone for having a sexual history or knowing what she wants. As long as she's not hiding something that will put me in danger, I'm more worried about the current relationship than the past. I feel like the girls I meet are more scared of their sexuality.

[lolli]

Just tell them what to do. Not is a comanding way. But obviously they don't know.

[Anonymous]

it gets better with time...beginners are shy