Guys help! Breakup and does anyone like soft girls?

Guys, do you like/prefer girls who are soft? My ex dumped me partially because he's not sexually attracted to me anymore and he cited one reason being that he prefers toned and fit girls, and that I could lose weight. I'm a size 2 dress, 33-26-37. But I have no abs, just the soft feminine "curve" below the belly button. It was to the point where I was always obsessed with sex and he wasn't. Yet, freakin why did he date me when that was his preference? I asked him before if my softness was OK, and he said he said yes because he was being "a nice guy." He also said that I was insecure, but I was insecure as he was pulling away! I miss him and I miss sex so much but I hate all the awful things he said about me. :(
Updates:
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For those who don't know what size I'd be, I wear a small junior's t-shirt and size small panties.
+1 y
My favorite line of his? "There's more to life than just sex." No sh*t, Sherlock, but that doesn't mean that I'm wrong for wanting it so much with JUST YOU. Um, I kind of love you and want to express my love while also getting off. Why do guys suddenly find that repulsive? I don't understand!
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Another gem: "You have to potential to have such a sexy body if you just toned up." Dude I don't even have cellulite! Why did you tell me how sexy I was when you didn't mean it?
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Keep moving and you'll "come across" (I try not to use the word "find" since that implies you've lost something) a guy that likes (loves) ALL of you (even the parts you think are soft), he'll just think are "perfect" (I'm still looking for a "better" word that this... long story). At least that's on the physical level. I just keep saying "the physical part's easy, because you see that all the time at first and that's what 'reels a person in' ".

    As others have said on here, we all like different things, that's just the fact of it. As far as him saying "I was OK" and just being nice, that's just a cop out IMO. The guy has to know what he wants and not just "settle" or "just being nice". Some just go for "convenience" or whatever, and as you said, it would have been better if he were to have said at the beginning that "he wasn't able to accept ALL of you" before you got to the boyfriend / girlfriend stage

    The measurements are "wow" factor and depending on how you dress, just "daymn".

    As for the sex part, if the guy really does like (love) all of you, he'll want jump onto you or you onto him every chance he gets.

    • When I would wear sexy lingerie for him, he would say things like "I'm the luckiest guy in the world" and out of nowhere he tells me all this? I thought he was "perfect" because it was him, even though objectively he's way too skinny for a guy. Is that what you mean? I was the most attracted to him more than any other guy because I loved him and I wanted him to eel the same for me.

    • And thank you very much. I guess I'm too open and trusting from the beginning. I tell guys things with 100% honesty and stress that's what I want in return, then I get screwed over anyway when they aren't truthful with me (even wthout flat-out lying like this guy).

    • All I have to say is "ouch" to all of comments (both in the update section and down here). Please don't change because of one dufus. Please don't. As I've said before, someone will appreciate you for ALL of you. I'm not sure which part you're referring to when you asked "is that what you mean?" All I know is that you can "want" for someone else more than the anything else, but at the end of the day, it's what you feel that you can control.

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  • You have hot measurements and I believe you are hot. Feminine curves adn softness is sexy to me. What I think is the guy left kos he is finding some other place to stick his **** :P..maybe another girl. and he has come up with a dumb excuse. Forget him. there are many guys who would want a hot girl like you :)

    btw, if you miss sex so much , close your eyes, think of your favorite hottest fantasy and make good use of that dildo or banana or those nice fingers :). or why not cyber. I can give you help *wink* :P ;)

    don't get into a relationship juss for sex. if you are open type go for one night stands with a stranger.

    • I just wanted him. I had no business being with him, but he said he wanted a monogamous relationship like I did and said he loved me first. And thank you so much.

Most Helpful Girls

  • Being thin/slim =/= fit or in shape

    You're skinny fat; while there's nothing wrong with that, we all have preferences

    I don't think he should have been an ass about it, and I feel like it's best that y'all are no longer together because he seems to not know what he wants.

    His rudeness is probably a sign of he doesn't care and just wanted it to be done with.

    Alot of guys prefer chubby girls, while others prefer skinny and some prefer more toned and fit. That's life; it's the same with chicks having preferences.

    • That's fine; but I just wish he had told me from the start. Then I wouldn't have dated him. If he said a "uhh that's not gonna work for me" it would have hurt, but I would have known to run before giving him my heart.

    • Not having cellulite doesn't mean you're toned or in shape. Sorry. You're skinny fat. If that's such a problem, then get in shape But honestly, I feel this question is double sided and there's more to the story. So to end without a desire to know more, just move on.

    • I know that I'm skinnyfat, but I hate how he lied to me

  • First, he's a jerk posing as a nice guy. A guy was chasing after me for weeks, knowing what I look like. One evening he texted me that if I started to jog I'd look even sexier (which is his "nice" way of saying I'm not fit enough to be with him). We both wanted sex, but with comments like that around the corner, I'll tell you know that he was not worth my time.

    Don't pay any attention to him.

    Some guys REALLY LOVE girls with the extra curves. Just watch to keep flab in check. :-)

    • What an a**hole! But at least he was decent enough to show you his true colors first. I couldn't even get that. :( I may not be his type but The way he acted I might as well be Jabba the Hutt.

    • What a jerk. (Sigh.) Sorry you went through that; I know exactly what you mean. (I'm a size 2 also and can't imagine how teeny I'd have to be to please the dude.) Another guy told me that guys LOVE the really soft skin at the tops of out thighs. It's just naturally softer and no matter how thin a girl is, it's apparently always a little less toned and therefore nice for them to fondle. Go figure...

    • Thank you very much for the kind words. I'm sorry you had a jerk too.

  • 2?

    what is wrong with that guy?

    what does he want a bag of bones?

    sorry if I sounded mean there, but whoa! this guy really has high standards, because a size 2 is still pretty small. I don't see anything wrong with being a size 2.

    dont worry about him. he's not worth your time.

    you'll find a better guy. one who isn't so picky. there's nothing wrong with your body.

    • Thank you. :)

  • how much do you weigh? just curious.

    id he's a heath guru freak & skinny, he might just have a hard lean as a board sense if fitness.

    i have a friend whs size 2 & about 5 3 she's soft, but not fat. she's really cute. everyone thinks so..

    • 117, 5'3". But I'm usually around 115.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • You have perfect measurements. I'm not just saying that to be "a nice guy". Your waist-hip-ratio is 0.7, which is considered perfect by most definitions. Unless you're under 5 feet tall, I HIGHLY doubt you should lose weight. Are you sure those measurements are correct? Seriously.

    I don't really understand guys who only like toned women. It just does not compute with me.

    So, to answer your question, yes, I prefer soft women.

    • Indeed. Tummy is 27 right now cause it's the end of the day, but all the others are correct. And no, I'm 5'3 and have a pretty face and pretty hair. People tell me at work I should be a model. :( Apparently being insecure due to begging for attention and sex from your boyfriend is a no-no.

  • Wow. That man has ridiculously high standards. Size 2? That's plenty skinny. He's got a warped sense of beauty. If what he wants is 6 pack abs then he can go off and find a fitness model. You're fine the way you are. He just can't appreciate it.

    • He said he didn't want a six-pack but just for me to be "toned" "for my health." He's a health guru who eats fruits and veggies only so that he's super skinny, all muscle no fat.

    • I don't understand what kind of soft curve he's talking about. Like that little bump over your pants?

    • Yeah. Like a pooch but not saggy like a pooch. Just a little belly.

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  • I am fine with fit OR soft...(:(:(:

    • Yes :):)

  • Lol well I'm kinda a health guru and that honestly may be TOO skinny.

    I think he just had a lame excuse.

    • I'm short though. And yeah :/ He wants to sit at home playing his WoW all day without the drudgery of a girlfriend who begs for sex and wants to be taken out to dinner once in a while.

    • what a loser... ditch his ass

    • Thanks. I gave him so much and he barely gave me anything.

  • Damn, you make me regret that I insulted a not so fit girl back then, because the true reason why i complained about her was that she didn't smile as much as in her pictures, but all i said to others about her is that she could lose weight like you say it. In a way, girls like you are attractive indeed.

  • you sound great. The guy doesn't know what he wants. I would love to date a girl who enjoys a lot of sex with that bodytype :)

    • I wish he told me how unhappy he was. I would ask him and he wouldn't tell me. He told me how he didn't want to hurt me and stuff early on cause he is a loner and hasn't been with many girls.

    • he is just making excuses to make him self look and feel better. He doesn't want to take responsibility so he is blaming you instead.

    • Yeah I was pushing him to tell me and he was like "I'm not here to hurt your feelings" but I got him to tell me. And yeah, he's only trying to make himself look better. I wish I could find a guy who was happy with me and gave me as much as I gave him. Oh, and someone who can't wait to have sex with me every freakin day!

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