He believes that giving oral is "unsanitary"

I've been with this guy for a while now, and he's great, but his big problem is that he thinks that both giving AND receiving oral is unsanitary. Personally, I love giving head, but he won't let me AND he refuses to go down on me. To top that off, he just freaked out on me about how he doesn't want me to masturbate! You see, its a rare occasion when I come from actual penetration, and I've never really cared because the other guys who I've been with are more than glad to go down on be later on, but literally now its like he doesn't want me to ever come. I've suggested showering before, but he just goes on about how its still unsanitary. Its getting extremely annoying, is there any way I can change his way of thinking?
0 0

Most Helpful Guys

  • I doubt that you can change his thinking. He seems to be germ freak. More germs can probably spread from kissing than from giving oral sex to a girl because the mouth has more germs than the vagina does. From my own experience and from what I've heard and read, women have a hard time cumming with a man just from having sex. That's why your other guys went down on you and were more than happy to make sure you orgasmed and were satisfied. Most guys really love going down on a girl and tonguing her crazy even though many haven't realized they need to do it right to make their girls cum and enjoy the experience completely. Way often I hear that too many guys aren't good at doing that and that's one of their big mistakes because they're missing out on so much since women really want and need that, and it can be very disappointing to a girl when a guy starts but doesn't know how to finish her. Too bad he wouldn't go down on you and listen to you on how to do what pleasures you most and then start practicing until he's perfect. But who does he think he is that he can tell you not to masturbate? Gosh he doesn't even have to know! Just do it whenever you want to. That's a decision all your own if you want to do that or not. Also, I think he's going to keep getting more and more annoying because he doesn't seem to me to be compatible with your desires at all. I think you should leave him and look for a guy that's more into what you are. I don't think you should stay with this loser. Good luck!

  • Run, Run, Run. Trust me. The more anxiously you try to persist here, all it will do is probably backfire in your face. He will become more indignant, and you will just want the things you want even more anxiously. It is hard to get someone past that "grossed out" feeling, and that is what he has. You won't win this battle, and in the end, you will end up feel cheated, dejected, and depressed by the entire situation. That is, if you aren't already there. Good luck.

Most Helpful Girls

  • I don't think you can change his mind. Usually when people are health conscious, they stick to their beliefs. Though, the masturbation thing seems a little far. It's your body, you should do with it what you want! But also, this is a relationship, and the two of you have to work together to make it work. Try making a compromise. You could still off giving him head, but maybe use a condom (sorry if this one is a bad advice, I've never given head before or if a condom makes too big a difference). If not, and your still unhappy, then maybe he isn't the one for you. You should try getting a boyfriend that is willing to experiment and give and recieve pleasure in return. Hope this helped!

  • Someone that psychotic about sanitation isn't worth your time in my opinion. Oral sex is something you love and something he's offended by. You may really like him but I don't see you two getting very far if he feels that way.

  • I think you're out of luck. If you've got some kind of weird sexual hangup like this I don't think it goes away easily. Plus if you do go down on him he'll probably think you're dirty or some crap like that. Sorry.

Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions

What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!

What Girls & Guys Said

1 1
  • Red Flag. Sexual incompatibility to the max. I don't think you're going to change his thinking so you're going to have to change boyfriends.

  • show him more of you like shorter shirts and shorter pants

    he think your to sexy to resist just work your way to it