He wants to go to a sex club with me. Is this a bad sign, or could it be fun?

[Anonymous]

I've been in a relationship for 2 years. We both have very high sex drives, and we love each other. Recently a friend of his went to a sex club. When we were on the phone he told me about what his friend said, and he said "I was thinking that sounded kind of fun, but I'd only want to go with you, I wouldn't want to have sex with random people." He has never had a one night stand, this makes sense. We're both kind of kinky, we've done anal sex and other things like that, but we've never had sex in public. I kind of like the idea, but a part of me is a bit scared that it means he's bored. He said he thought it might just be funny to see what it's like.

[Simple-Simonette]

I went to the local "swingers" club as a guest one evening and I have to say it was a very interesting experience. I guess I would call myself a voyeur. (I like to watch but don't like to be touched.) There was a lot to experience that night and despite my initial misgivings - it was fun. I liked dressing "sexy" without feeling old or dirty, I liked sloppy kissing and groping my husband without restraint, and we enjoyed watching the couples around us. I felt unrestricted - and I could be as open or prudish as I wanted.

The thing about sex clubs or swinger clubs is participation is NOT required. You don't have to throw yourself into a mass orgy or make out with every guy who grabs you. As a matter of fact, most sex/swinger clubs do everything they can to make the women comfortable. When I went, there was a HUGE list of rules for men to follow - No touching without invitation, no pressuring women, no means no, no picture taking, blah blah. There was a zero tolerance for broken rules. The only rule women had to follow was - "Be sexy and have fun!"

I don't see anything wrong with checking it out, as long as you and your boyfriend discuss in detail your expectations and limits. Let him know what you are and aren't comfortable with, and don't let him pressure you to feel otherwise.

You don't have to be bored to want new experiences; don't feel that way. You still like steak when you're eating pizza.

Good luck.

[tarkan]

well at least the fact the he wants to go with you is something you could be proud of. it would mean trouble if you found out he's anticipating to go without you :D... as for other thing, it's really up to u. and remember no matter whatever your worries are, you should discuss it with him and let him know no matter what. the key here is communication :)

[katiesmuff]

It means he just wants to spice things up a bit! If the two of you are a bit on the kinky side go and meet the other people. Let him f**k you in front of them, then watch some of them go at it.

[Littletad]

Perfectly fine to venture into new areas regarding sex. Just keep in mind that, yes, he might be getting bored. Or he might just want to try something new. I'd strongly suggest you consider talking about this one. Having sex in groups, only leads more and more to couples sex and swapping partners. As long as the communication is strong on what you want and don't want, by all means have fun. But just keep in mind that many couples are not prepared for consequences when they arrive because of lack of communication.

[jimmydean72]

If you care about him you shouldn't go. It will change the relationship forever. Have you ever slept with a guy after the first date...and you find out he's not interested anymore? Same theory. If there is any chance for long term (i.e. marriage, kids, etc.) it would be a huge mistake to go.

[ambermarie]

Exactly what he said hun

[peace-love-couture]

Well boredom in the bedroom comes at one point or another.

I say if you are comfortable with it and like the idea,then try it.You might end up having more fun then you think.

Nothing to be scared about,you just have to explore sexually.

[Anonymous]

It could end badly or it could be fun, maybe you will regret it maybe you wont, depends if you are willing to take the chance...

[Anonymous]

iv done this with my current boyfriend once... we talkd bouut it for months till we were completly sure... it was a CRAZY night... there was people haven sex aall over the place it was at a house... I went to the bathroom with some guy we did our thing... as I went downstairs I see my boyfriend in the kichen and he has a girl bent over the counter f***ing her... I didn't get jealous just saw for a little till a guy grabd me and took me upstairs lol... we had fun never argued bout it... never botherd us at all... but that's just us