How many sexual partners is good/slutty/bad etc?

Do you want a partner to be experienced or do you prefer a virgin with no experience at all?
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Most Helpful Girls

  • I think it more depends on the guy/girl you are with. If he has been with many and he doesn't talk about them then it feels like to me, it's OK. If he has been with 0-1 and he talks about girls like he is a slut and he has done this and that (bragging about it) then it feels like he just sees me as a peace of meat and then I get mad (ya know, no one wants to be treated like less than human). Well, that's what I think. I've been friends with guys who have been with over 20+ at ages 20-24 and I also been with guys who have been with only 0-1 and talk about girls like they are just piece of tools. So to one their own opinion and their own experience I'm sure.

    basically what I am saying is I have learned that it is the way a man treats you, not how many he has slept with. But I would prefer that he has slept with zero, since I slept with zero men before him. He had slept with one before me and talked about her like she was a peace of meat he used for sex. And then he continued to treat me like one. We are still dealing with this as time goes. I am sorry I am venting on your question.

  • I personaly don't tell any of my partners how many sexual encounters I have had, even if they ask.

    Its none of their business, and what is in the past is my business.

    I don't really care too much how many they have had as long as they are not all skanky .

    Preferably my ideal partner would have less than 10 partners!

    Lol

    • sex is not just a personal business but a lot more...otherwise you just consudering all your partners as just machines to fulfil your greed which is nothing but yourself being in a brothel, though not a professional ! please do not be angry, but your response to the question is as such.

  • I think it's all dependent on age and intention. If a guy told me he had 7 partners and all of them were girls he liked/dated, that would be better than a guy with 5 who were all one night stands.

    • true...would feel the same about it

Most Helpful Guys

  • In an MSNBC poll, data was gathered from 6,237 adults, aged 20 to 59. It found that that 29 percent of American men report having 15 or more female sexual partners in a lifetime, while only 9 percent of women report having sex with 15 or more men. So out of 6237 people aged 20 to 59 interviewed - 1808 men said they had 15 or more partners, while 561 women responded in the same manner. Here is the link

    Research at Kinsley Institute shows - Males 30-44 report an average of 6-8 female sexual partners in their lifetime. Females 30-44 report an average of 4 male sexual partners in their lifetime.

    This report has a lot of good statistics on it - link

    What does it mean if you have sex more than the average person, it depends. I myself, would think if your a little bit over the average not much at all. If your way over the average I would start questioning your decision making abilities and your sense of self worth. Though this is a question I a long time ago stop asking my partners (how people have you had sex with in the past).

    • oh it's not that I would ask them... I honestly think it's none of my business and it's not their business of my ex-partners :) thx for the links

    • I don't quite agree with that, if your dating that is one thing, if your going to engage in sexual behavior with someone it is completely your business. STD's are no joke. I just learned a long time ago that I never liked the answers I heard so I stopped asking!

    • Those numbers may be what people report, but as we learned in my psych class, it's mathematically impossible for men to have an *average* that's higher than a woman's *average.* Unless men are having sex with things other than women. It was proven that men add a few to their number, and women deduct a few. It ends up being about 6 partners for everyone on average.

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  • I've been with both experienced women, and I've had the privilege/responsibility of being a girl's first time.

    In looking back, I don't really have a preference if it's a girl I'm into. If it's just casual, then I prefer the experience.

    • I like that you see it as well a responsibility... when I guy does it right at her first time... than he really has done smth right! :)

    • Well, I have found that for most women, the first time really sets the tone for how she relates to her own sexuality. I believe EVERYONE should enjoy their own sexuality for a lifetime. So, as the guy, I wouldn't want a girl to hide the fact she's a virgin from me. I want to know, so I can make it all about her for a while. It's not just sex, but also her education and exploration of how sex is now a part of her life.

    • I hope more guys read this and learn from it... especially for all the virgins out there! ;)

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What Girls & Guys Said

4 13
  • I have had a fairly wide spectrum of partners - from a complete virgin to a girl who had slept with more than 90 guys in her life. I don't really like one extreme or the other. the virgin is generally really nervous and not very adventurous, but people who have slept with loads of guys (e.g. more than 50) tend to be a bit unromantic when it comes to sex. somewhere in the middle is best.

    • so are you still under the 50?

    • me? yeah...haha less than 10 even, but I thought you were asking about what I'd look for in a partner.

    • you understood the question correctly... I was just wondering because you seem to want someone more romantic ;)

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  • Well, I can only answer for myself, but I would prefer a woman with no experience or very little, as I have no experience of my own. I was raised with strong moral and Christian beliefs about sex, and I believe it should be saved for marriage. However, that said, I also realize that in this day and age, it's pretty unrealistic to expect to find a woman who has refrained from intercourse, especially in my age-range, so I'd be content with a woman with maybe 3 or less partners, if it came to that. I guess it really depends upon what kind of guy you're looking for as well, since each guy has different preferences in that department.

  • If my girlfriend had slept with more than 4 or 5 people I wouldn't like it. And if she had had casual sex before I wouldn't want to be with her. When I'm with a girl who is choosy and 'exclusive' with her body it gives me a big self-esteem boost. But if she's easy she can never be special to me. She might be a nice person but I won't see her as girlfriend material. But I'd feel a bit weird with a virgin. I'm 25, and if I was with a girl of a similar age who hadn't had sex before I'd think she was a bit strange. And if she's a virgin for religious reasons I'd find her even more strange (like - so when did the invisible man tell you not to f**k?)

    • hahha to the invisible man ...but are you in the same way choosy about your body? or do you only expect that from the woman?

    • I'm not into casual sex, but if even if I had had loads of casual sex there would be no contradiction in wanting to be with a girl who hadn't. Because, as I said, being with a choosy girl makes me feel good. It doesn't matter if I'm choosy or not because I'm not in a relationship with myself am I? My happiness in the relationship is not affected by my sexual history. Most girls don't care so much about my sexual history so its OK. But they make up for it with ex jealousy, so we're equal!

  • It's not about the number of partners, rather it is about whether wwhen you had sex with them it was casual sex or you actually liked them, I say like loosly because I mean a deeper emotion than just thinking someone is attractive and funny but not necessaraly love since it is so rare. Basically as long as the sex is emotional and not just physical it is okay.

    • So let's say you are about 30 years old. And a woman in the same age comes up and had about 10 sexual partners, some one-night-stands, some in relation ships?

    • Well I'm 19 I would just be psyched that a cougar was hitting on me lol, but in all honesty the more of those that had not would of been one night stands the better guys will feel, however that dosen't mean that girls who have had to many one night stands are undatable, My girlfriend right now before being with me had sorta been a slut at our school but we have been together 2 years now with a great relationship, while at first I never wanted to date her because of her past love does trump bias it just

    • a while, eventually I did decide I liked her to look past her past and I am glad I did she is a great girl, I guess she had just been used to being treated like a piece of meat rather than a woman. Also ten guys is not that many especially if you are thirty, I know highscool girls well over 20

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  • There is no number, it is all in whether you think before you do something. Be smart about it, don't get an STD or pregnant or do something you'll regret. If you enjoy it, and are smart about it, then its all good. I am a little wary about a virgin because there are usually a lot of complex emotions involved on her part.

  • I would prefer a virgin (I'm waiting for marriage) but in the past I was satisfied with a girl who's at least still tight down there.

    • What do you exactly mean with tight?

    • A girl who doesn't seem like she's had intercourse with loadsa guys basically.

    • so you expect the girl to be virgin but you can mess around til marriage?

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  • I prefer both 4rm different perspectives...

  • let em have some exp... makes the sex better, more fun... a virgin... is teachable... but it's work.

  • well at your age it doesn't really matter because its not likely you will get married but for a women that I would like to be with for the rest of my life I would prefer her to have as little sex possible I wouldn't want her to be loose I would like to be the one to stretch her out not other men

  • I prefer a virgin because I'm one and it'd be awesome to share the experience but other than that I also think it'd be hot if girl could teach me.

  • I think the more unexperienced the better, in the end. Experience has its advantages, but overall less experience takes it.

  • a virgin with no experience is not a bad thing; all it means is you get to learn with her, and that the sex is that much more intimate and meaningful. why would I want to commit to a girl who was f***ing around while I was working my ass off to be successful in my life and doing what I thought was "the right thing" in regards to sex and relationships

  • I believe in waiting till marriage to have sex, so I wouldn't want more than 1 throughout my entire life.

  • I would prefer someone who has some experience so he knows what he's doing.

  • Doesn't matter as long as you don't have one night stands or FWB. As long as you have an emotional connection before a physical one, the number doesn't matter.

  • It's more intense if you know that you're your partner's first, that you're the first she's trusted. I wouldn't care for experience, though I'm just one guy.

  • I think from 1-4 is normal, 5-up is a little too much. But that's my opinion.

    • Even if you are about 40 years old? Or are you talking more about somebody in the twenties?

    • I'd hope she means early 20's. I tend to be on the lower end for what's too many and I think that's ridiculous for age 40. lol

    • @snackeyg hehehe... same here!

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