Sexual Health
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I can't take my girlfriend's sexual past. Why?

Before I knew very little about her previous sex-life and all was great. Then she told be about all the crazy things she has done before settling down and all of the sudden I have this weird feeling in my stomach when I'm around her. And I can't get those nasty images of other guys f***ing her out of my head. For example she has had sex with 42 guys (she is 27 years old), had a threesome where one guy f***ed her ass and the other her pussy, and she has stripped naked at a stripping contest at a club on a vacation. Now this is all the past and shouldn't bother me because she is faithful and very sweet. The problem must be me. Why is this bothering me?
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Ohhhh man I know exactly what you're talking about man! My girl told me her sexual past..I mean, I did ask, but my initial reaction was borderline jealousy...and then I started wondering why exactly I was feeling that way...In the end I came up with this: She did have sex before me...but she's in love with me now, and she has proven she loves only me, and I trust that. It was tough but I got used to it...trust me man, if she's worth your time and you know she loves you, and you love her, that's all that will matter. Just let your caring and love for one another rule in this and be the determining factor..Good luck my friend :)

    • I hope your right =)

    • Stay strong bro!!...just find new things to love her for if all else fails...even though this is kinda a rotten thing to say: the past is the past and we cannot change it...but you can heal from it.

  • Jealousy is a very natural feeling that is programmed into men. You feel threatened because all of those men violated your woman. I know it is not poltically correct to say you own someone, but your girl is a part of you. You spend time with her, and you have made an investment in her. You have to protect her; since you have no control over these other men, you feel powerless and intimidated. Thus, those images bother you. You must realize that she is with you now. You are enough man for her. Otherwise, she'd left you by now. Those men mean nothing.

Most Helpful Girl

  • I have a very similar problem as you.

    I feel like, my boyfriend had had too much sexual experience that will be "greater" than the sexual experiences he has with me

    and I have to compete.

    but I don't want to

    I don't want to feel inferior and I dont' even like the sexual experiences he has had because I sort of feel they are gross to me and nothing I would ever do or ever done

    I slightly some times feel like he was bragging to me about them

    he should have never told me the things he did with his sexual past

    now the real question is, are you going to get over it?

    • Get over it? I don't know, I think I need to figure out why it is bothering me so much if I am to ever get over it. I feel confused about the way I am reacting.

    • If you can't get over it, then the solution may be that she will just have to put up with it. that's what I have decided. I'm never going to get over it, and he will have to just learn to put up with it. That's what we have been doing for the last YEAR we've been together. Just me being mad at his disgusting past and him trying to say I'm just in a bad mood and better days will come... good luck

    • I have the same problem with my boyfriend of almost a year. I posted a very similar question to this, but he wasn't as extreme as this girl. And I feel the same, it is a disgusting past.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Dude, I don't blame you for feeling upset. It's normal for guys to hate the idea that his girlfriend is a total slut. The only guys who are okay with their girlfriends being like your's are guys like Tommy Lee or men who tend to get married to p*rn stars.

    If you're okay with your girlfriend's past, then there's no problem. But, judging by your post, you do have a problem so you should probably think about getting a new girlfriend.

  • I would feel the same way. I don't see it as a problem really.

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