I had an abortion - should I tell my guy?

so this guy that I have been sleeping with got me pregnant and I decided to have an abortion. I just can't decide if I should tell him or not. I'm worried of what his reaction might be. he did say a few months ago that he really cares about me (just isn't ready for a relationship) and that he would want me to have an abortion if I did turn out pregnant. so guys I want to know how you would react if you found out that you got a girl pregant and she had an abortion. would you be mad that she hasn't told you until now? would you feel sad for her and want to be there for her? or would you leave her alone/ ditch her? thankies
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Most Helpful Girls

  • How long has it been? Well he had already told you that if you were to get pregnant that you should get an abortion and that is bluntly telling you that he does not want to have any part of the baby and have no attachments to you. He does care about you but he would probably be definitely surprised and upset that you kept that from him and that you did not tell him until now.i think that just causes problems.you should of told him.i say keep it to yourself you have done so this far.I can't tell you what to do seriousley if it is aching you that bad tell him but be prepared for his reaction because either way it might hurt.Ive been dating my guy for about a year now and he has told me that he is not ready for a relationship (titles are complicated and I'm not worried) He is my bestfriend and I love him, we have had the same conversation that you and your guy had and I told him that I would just get rid of the baby and not tell him.he told me that it would be real ignorant for me to do even though he does not want the baby he still has a right to know, if I would do something like that how could he trust me that I'm not keeping anything else important away from him.how could he trust me?

  • My boyfriend would be pretty pissed if I had an abortion and didn't tell him. He probably wouldn't talk to me again. (Those are his own words)

    I would say, it is a pregnancy you decided not to carrry through, and so what does it matter? Many, many women our age get abortions. Was it the morning after pill or a surgery? It is no one else's decision: it's your body.

    Do you go to or live near a college by any chance? I belong to a Women's Rights group on my campus, which you can go to for support (ours has local women who are not students too). There are often women's groups, if you want some support and empowerment. I suggest seeking them out. :)

  • You need to tell him! In a relationship or not he could of been the father of your child. He deserves to know. No matter his reaction(mad, calm,sad,etc.) I'm sure he would still want to talk about it. I would be mad if I was a guy and found out "my girl" got pregnant and never told me. Remember Honesty is the best policy and he will respect you more for it.

  • Well first of all, sorry you had to go through the abortion without any support from the father. Secondly, are you still involved with this guy? If not I really don't see the point in telling him that you even had an abortion. You pretty much knew where he stood on the issue before hand, I'm assuming that's why you didn't tell him in the first place.

Most Helpful Guys

  • seems liek he told you that if you did get prego to have an abortion, kinda like an excuse to not use protection. as for telling him, if you can see yourself getting into a relationship with him, then by all means he needs to know ASAP, if he's not gonna be in a relationship I would think (not knowing the guy) he just might ditch on ya. so thinkhard about what you want and think about his reactions.

  • I would be upset at you because you neglected to include me. Even though the guy supports abortion, it doesn't mean he would not have been there for you. Just remember, it takes two to tango.

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  • Since you aren't really boyfriend and girlfriend, I don't think you should tell him. I don't see what you'd have to gain by doing it, and I think you might really upset him. If you were in a relationship I might see it differently, I'm not sure.

  • Sometimes I've been to cryin' for unborn children
    That might have made me complete
    But I, I took the sweet life and never knew I'd be bitter from the sweet
    I spent my life exploring the subtle whoring that cost too much to be free

    Hey lady, I've been to paradise, but I've never been to me