I just found out my boyfriend used to go to prostitutes and don't know how to react

My college has recently started a huge social project that I'm volunteering for. I talked to this girl, who used to be a hooker for a while and showed her a picture of me and my boyfriend. And she was like "sweetheart, please don't get this the wrong way, but he used to be one of my clients" And she wasn't just saying that, she every thing about him, his name, last name, what he likes in the bedroom and everything. He is into a little BDSM, but what he does with me is totally harmless and nothing against what she told me. It was disgusting. We've been together for a year, I always told him I would only sleep with someone I love and he told he felt the same way about it. He even said that hook ups were gross. He was OK with waiting 6 months before having sex. He always he'd understand that I wanted my first to be special and now that I don't know what to do. Do I confront him? Do I even want to know what he has to say? Should I just break up. Even though he didn't cheat on me I feel so betrayed
0 0

Most Helpful Guys

  • First thing you should do is get tested for diseases in case he gave you anything.

    Maybe his mind has changed over time and he really does only want sex with feelings and thinks hook ups are gross now. His past is really his own business that he doesn't have to share with you if he doesn't want to. If you can't live with it then you should probably just dump him. Trying to talk to him about this would probably be bad.

    • he got tested before we first had sex. Why do you think it'd be bad to talk about it?

    • I imagine he would deny it at first because he thinks you don't know about it. After he realizes you do know he will probably feel ashamed and embarrassed assuming he is really serious about you. What is the point of you asking him about it? So he can admit at one time he just wanted sex and you can criticize him for that and be mad at him? I just don't think talking about it will make either of you feel better about his past. You should just forget it if he treats you well and you trust him now

  • There's nothing wrong with going to hookers if a guy can't find other girls to put out. Why are you being so judgmental towards your man? Instead, why aren't you upset with a girl that used to be a hooker who is now blabbing her mouth off? Double standard much?

Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions

What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!

What Girls & Guys Said

1 5
  • you can talk to him about it, but as long as he isn't doing it during your relationship than its ok

    he probably wants to forget about that part of his life, or you probably had a lot to do with changing his attitude towards sex

    • I think he should have told me instead of saying "oh no I'd never sleep with someone I didn't love, that's gross" He didn't do it during out relationship but pretty much right until our first day of dating. Can someone change that fast? And you have no idea the things he did with that girl, so I'm wondering how will this work out later in our relationships, because I'm sure not gonna do it, is gonna go to hookers again then?

    • its OK to feel uncomfortable with it. but definitely after meeting you, he changed. maybe he thinks its gross now because he see's what's better. maybe he's ashamed?

  • No, less said quickly mend.

    This might happened before you met. I do not tell my current girlfriend about my past escapades because I am a gentleman.

    The break out is up to you.

    You are upset because he lied to you.

    Would you accept an answer that it is the past and none of your business?

  • He did this before he was with you?

    • ya and he got tested before we had sex so he is STD free, even though they didn't use a condom

    • well then, now you have this information.. you can choose to let it go or you can leave him for it

  • More men than you could hardly thing have gone to prostitutes. It's not a big deal. We are more simple-minded respect to sex. The main thing is if he loves you or not. Probably he does, and if you also do, what's the problem? I think you can even talk with him about this, completely calm, not confronting anyone.

    Good luck and be patient with us. We are simple, rememember. You girls are much more complicated. jajajaja ;)

    • But didn't he lie when he said that he'd only sleep with somone he was in love with? And the things he did with that girl, you have no idea. It's hard to look past all that

  • You don't know for certain that he used hookers. She could just know some stuff about the guy.

    Ask him, don't accuse him, tell him what she said, and give him a chance to explain himself.

  • You should confront him...immediately

    • Any suggestions on how to start a conversation like that?

    • First ask him if he knows the girl... if he denies it then tell him that she knows him and told you blah... if he admits he knows her then ask him if they were ever together... and let the convo flow... don't acuse him yet... just see if he is honest and is worth being with..