Kissing doesn't turn me on

[Anonymous]

I'm with the right person, yet every time I kiss him, I don't feel the magic or whatever. I do like kissing. It worked on our first date because it made me very horny. But now it doesn't. I guess the feeling just faded away.

[AllisonD]

It's supposed to turn you on? It's not like that for me and yet I'm with the right person too. I plan to marry him one day. (Been with him for 9 years.) I think that sort of stuff only happens in movies where you feel like you're floating on air. But in real life, that doesn't happen. It's not like you're having sex. That's totally different. That turns me on.

[desidoll]

I am not so sure if you were really into him or if he was the right person but you are suppose to be aroused during kissing.I think you like him a lot but just not that sexually attracted to him.If I were in this situation,it definitely means I am not attracted to him though but maybe there is some other reason for your problem.

[Asker]

I am sexually attracted to him. I get all excited when I see him. I've been with him for three years.

[desidoll]

What about more than kissing? Did you get turned on? If you did it means that you just need something more to stimulate your lust.It happens to some girls.

[Asker]

Yeah I get turned on. I think it was the effects due to birth control.

[desidoll]

Yes,could be.Maybe you can try stop taking it in some periods then see if there is any difference.

[Asker]

I don't take it anymore. But the effects are still there. Then I was on Coumadin and now I'm on Wellbutrian which should make things better.

[viva_glow]

Ahhh even when you kiss passionately?

There's no question stated here which is odd...

But I think that the magic comes from true attraction. So have you lost attraction...? What is it? You would know better than I would!

[Asker]

No lost attraction. Everything else about him excites me. I think the effects are probably due to the birth control I was on.

[viva_glow]

Hmm. You mean it's better now then? Cause yeah, birth control can do that...

[Asker]

Might be. We don't kiss unless we're having sex.

[viva_glow]

Wait, now I'm confused. You sounded like you were referring to a specific birth control pill in the past tense. And now you're speaking in present tense?

[viva_glow]

Next time you're kissing, stop and really think about the feeling. Sometimes wandering thoughts keep me from arousal. But if I really focus on the kiss, and I try to make it sexy, get into it, tease my guy a bit... my arousal level shoots through the roof. If you really can't do that, then consider a reassessment of what's going on in the relationship.

[Asker]

I used to be on the pill. Now I'm not. But the effects are probably still there from the birth control, then getting off of it, then being on Coumadin (blood thinners) and now I'm on Wellbutrian and Xanax.

[viva_glow]

I guess it's possible... :S

[Anonymous]

Kissing really doesn't do anything for me either. I don't know why. It never really has.

[Anonymous]

You sure you're with the right person then? Because that alone should make you feel something.

He may be a bad kisser, but even then... if you're not feeling anything, you're probably not with the right person.

[Asker]

I know I'm with the right person. I think I'm the bad kisser because I don't know what to do.

[Opinion Owner]

So it's just a problem with getting turned on with kissing? If that's the case then that's normal. You said it worked the first time but never again, and that's probably because the feelings were very new. Nothing wrong with not feeling it anymore if you love him and feel he is the right person.

[Opinion Owner]

If it really bothers you, you could try switching things up a little bit, Maybe if you normally never pull him toward you when you kiss him, do that, or if you never kiss for more than three seconds, try kissing for ten or more. Get into it. Nowadays if it's not a new kiss, I only get turned on kissing someone if the kiss is particularly passionate and breathtaking. When he pins me up against the wall and kisses me, I'm there instantly.