Ladies, do most women lie about their sexual past?

So recently I dumped a girl because she lied to me about never having had casual sex or cheating on a guy (turns out she's done both more than once). I flatly told a female friend that I dumped her for being a lying slut and explained the situation and only got "wow, you're a real jerk sometimes". So let's cut to the heart of the matter here, women are not men. Women can get pregnant and men can't, and women are biologically more likely to get STDs. Going with historical tradition, women have always been expected in basically every society to be more chaste than men. There is a strong historical precedence for valuing virginal women.
Yes, will lie
Vote A
No, won't lie but will stretch the truth
Vote B
No, most women will tell the entire truth
Vote C
Select gender and age to cast your vote:
Girl Guy
Updates:
+1 y
To answer the deleted post, yes I am saying it is slutty to have sex outside a committed relationship
0 0

Most Helpful Girls

  • its none of your bussiness what she does with her body before she met you.

    you can dump her, but she did nothing wrong.

    youre irrational and you had a major tantrum.

    shes not contaminating you with anything, she's not cheating on you with anyone, than you have no right to be angry.

    cut the bullsh*t. women are not expected to be chaste because of any heath benefits. its an effort to control their powers to create life.

    women are not mutilated as any benefit to them either. going by your argument u'd say that's good, it will prevent them from cheating getting pregnant getting stds.

    In addition, your fantasy of women and men somehow diverging greatly as far as sexual partners is completely illogical. If a man is less chaste than a woman, and there are equal numbers of men and women, who exactly is the less- chaste- than- the -woman'man' -f***ing?

    I don't lie to anyone who I'm supposedly in a trusting relationship with. I have no reason to. I don't do things I'm ashamed of.

    if they have a problem with things I have I done, that I do not have a problem with. we are NOT an appropriate match. and my history has nothing to do with i. we have differnt outlooks.

    you and your ex. should not be together. as you can ot respect her doing things that she has a right to do.

    it is nt that you are angry because she lied. you are angry she had sex.

    so you to are not a proper match, imo. I don't know why you even mentioned her having lied, as tho it maters. you don't RESPECT her having a history. she does. therefore you would have a non mutually respect based relationship. you belong apart. end of story.

    just as well you ended it.

    its still no ones business what I've done before I met them.

  • I can most deff understand why your upset and she should have told you. But in her head and her understandings she may have been trying something new as if she was pretending that none of that happened to start her life over again because she was not proud or happy with herself and what she had done. So by putting it behind her and starting new which would have been with you is why she prob never told you and said what she said. She wanted to become a person she wanted to be and that was by putting her lies behind her and start a fresh slate with herself. How long were you dating for? If it was a short time maybe eventually she would have told you and you would have been the hero who helped her realize that she can be a person of trust loyalty and love. She may not be happy with her self because you dumped her over this and hopefully doesn't give up on what she may have been trying to do differently in her life- which could be the reason why you got that response from a female friend. But I do completely understand too where you are coming from this she lied, lost your trust, and if you were together long or loved each other lost that too. Its a hard situation but to me that's what it seems like she was trying to do not saying you were the test more you could have been the winner! Sorry you had to be in this situation and either you guys can talk and maybe find out what was really going on and why she never told- if she means a lot to!

    • And to add to your update yes it is very wrong to cheat when your in a commited relationship but did she do this to you? Or just her past- Most times when people do things they normally change immediatly after regret for her it took her some time- but regrets her past and wants a better future-but if she cheated on you than that's diffrent but I think before you dumpedheryoushouldhave letherexplainandtalkedwith her...butiunderstandyoudidntwant to be one to be hurt by something you hateliars/cheaters!

  • There is no rule that women do or don't lie about their sexual history. Some women will and some women won't- JUST AS SOME MEN WILL LIE AND SOME MEN WON'T. I personally have been lied to about this by a guy, and I have not lied about it myself.

    It's true that our culture often values virginity in women, and often more so than in men. But that is the fault of a double standard in our society, and does not indicate that most women are liars. It's unfair and misogynistic to make that type of generalization. It's like asking if most men cheat. Plus, since I've shared your experience, I (a girl) could be asking if most men lie about their pasts! We are all individuals, and neither gender as a whole deserves to be associated with those negative stereotypes. One woman lied to you. One, out of the over three billion on this planet. If you let that make you suspicious of the entire female gender, you are the one who will pay.

    Whether or not you think it is slutty to have sex outside a relationship is beside the point. I think your female friend was offended more by your blatant judgmental language than she was by the fact that you dumped your girlfriend for those reasons.

Most Helpful Guys

  • I selected B but I mostly because I kind of fall between A and B.

    Let's be honest, women realize that its not exactly praised to be sexually promiscuous. 99% of women would not be flattered by the title of slut. As a result, girls have gotten really good and finding ways to manipulate the numbers in their favor.

    I think many guys will down right lie about their number so they don't look like a player or vise versa so they don't look like an inexperienced chump. Women on the other hand, don't like about the number, they lie about how that number is calculated.

    One thing girls will do for instance, is go back and sleep with past partners, like ex's so that their "number" stays down. Even though their behavior is still low class, they technically have not added another guy to the list. They will also reserve their sexual romps to oral sex or manual sex only, then justify to themselves that it wasn't "sex" so that she doesn't have to add that guy to her number of partners.

    So many times (has actually happened to me) a girl will claim to not be a slut and to have had sex with only a few guys, when in actuality, she's given BJ's to 30 guys, had sex with 3 different ex's, hooked up with 50 guys, has slept in the bed of 10, etc. So yes, this same girl may have only had "intercourse" with maybe 5 guys, but clearly this same girl is no saint.

    So in a sense girls lie, but just not in absolute terms like men do, they just find ways to spin and stretch the truth so that their number can be justifiably low.

    • See I consider anyone with whom I have done anything sexual with a partner regardless of what it was. And I do hookup with ex's at times. I don't see that as low class. A couple times the relationship didn't work but we were good together in the sack so nothing wrong with a friends with benefits relationship with someone you know and trust.

    • Not all women do this of course, but usually only the women who have something to hide. As far as the ex's thing, to each his own I guess, but personally I think this is the worst idea ever. You're ex's for a reason. Having any relations with ex's in my opinion almost always leads to drama in some way, keeps you from moving on, or chases away prospective new dates. Best to leave ex's in the past, not continue f***ing them.

    • The easy question is "Have you ever had any kind of sex other than in a committed relationship?" I have had women cry, key my car or storm out of restaurants after I ask this question heh

    • Show All
  • I think your friend thought of you as a jerk because of your use of the word "slut." Your ex was a liar, but that's as far as it needed to go when you described it. Slut is an ambiguous term, and to be perfectly frank, I consider it complimentary.

    To call a girl a slut is to say that you don't want girls to be promiscuous, and to further want to sleep with girls is a contradiction. You do no one a favor by shaming slutty behavior, except non-slutty girls (by affirming their personal choices). But what's the benefit in that? It isn't like non-slutty girls are going to sleep with us.

    • Yeah OK that doesn't change the fact it's hard for a guy to get sex. It's easy for a woman to get sex. It's incredibly easy and requires no skill. Women are more likely to get many kinds of STDs and are able to be pregnant. Most nations outside America have no laws requiring the guy to deal with the kid either. Women are not equal to men, and cannot be because of biology. That's just the way the world is. Pretending otherwise is willful delusion.

    • I'm not pretending anything. My point was basically summarized in your first two sentences, with the addition of "so why would you shun women who are giving sex to men?"

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What Girls & Guys Said

9 3
  • Oh geez another misogynistic question posed so you are the victim. A question of how reliable your source was would be good. Also do you know the circumstances of the alledged incidences? Perhaps she was under the influence. Maybe somebody was lying. Or maybe she decided to start new and pretend the old life was non existent. As for cutting to the chase you are saying things that are yes true biologically and historically for women, but has no bearing. Only women are called sluts no matter how many people they have slept with. The man could do the same thing and be called a hero by his fellow men. I notice you didn't say you dislike this behavior in men only women. Such double standards is pathetic. And yes sir you are an awful jerk. Perhaps should you really have liked her you could have moved past this and it been a bonding experience.

    • Agreed. This question is a misognystic one written by anon user.(no surprise there)

    • It should be legal for a man to divorce and/or beat a woman to death for lying about these sorts of things

    • how is it misogynistic, and if he was lied to he is a victim.

    • Show All
  • Do you hold yourself to the same standard? If so, it's valid to not want a girl who has different morals.

    If not, you're being ridiculous.

  • I could ask the same thing of you men. I personally have never had sex. And I'll say that loud and proud. I also have never cheated. I will also say that loud and proud. I however, have been cheated on. I'll say that if asked but I'm not very impressed with that fact about me.

    HOWEVER I will NOT be with a man who has had sex before. If you are saying that men deserve to be with virgin women, and women don't deserve to be with virgin men, there I will disagree with you.

    I hold my potential partner to the same standards I hold myself. If he has had sex, I will not date him. I have not had sex and have absolutely no desire to be with an "experienced" guy. I find it the greatest turn off of them all.

    But back to your question, no, I wouldn't lie. But you seem to think it's okay for guys to have a sexual past and for women to not. That's wrong.

  • I flat out lie..."dumped her for being a lying slut ", cheated, one night stands, I've done both more than once, and like your reaction, that's why I lie, because I'm older now and have been in a committed relationship for 7 years, I do believe people change and you are a jerk for being judgmental.

    but you do deserve your opinion, and she deserves a guy who loves her for her, so its for the best I'm sure.

    as far as virginity

    a guy is a virgin for 3 reasons

    he is shy and afraid of women

    is ugly and awkward

    actually and unlikely values and wants to stay a virgin (maybe religious)

    A woman is a virgin only if

    she has a huge value to stay a virgin

    there is allot more pressure on girls to have sex, no matter how ugly or awkward, she can get laid without trying and guys will be trying to put it in her.

    • Wow you lie, why must you deceive men

    • i think anyone who doesn't say they lie is a liar

  • Wow you have deep mental issues going go... Women have the same rights than men... Your point of view is really sexist. Even today women feel guilty of having and enjoying sex and that because of some sexist morons like you. I'm not a feminist or something like that but I believe I have the same right to enjoy sex that you and any other man in the world. I wouldn't lie about my sex past because its noting to be ashamed.

    • his point of view is not sexist it is just his opinion also what does his opinion have to do with rights, you have the right to sleep around and men have the right to judge you for it

    • @dudeman you are wrong you don't have the right to judge me or anyone else. Its stupid that in 2012 some men still think that we as women don't have the same rights... well that's why you are writting in this page while masturbating to answers and not having sex with an actual girl...

    • Uhh not being juged is not a right. Also women do have the same sexual rights as men so stop saying they dont

  • I chose B, of course a guy is going to chose A lol, but me, I have never lied lol. Some girls will, but that's just not me :).

    • i agree that is slutty, I don't do that

  • Okay maybe she shouldn't have lied. But there's nothing wrong with casual sex for a woman or a man. Being able to be pregnant means nothing. I agree with your friend, you are a jerk.

    • being able to get pregnant means womens sexuality has more destructive potential to society as a whole

    • Sure. Being able to make women pregnant isn't though?

  • They will NEVER tell the truth about that.

  • Things are really not that complicated. Guys prefer a girl to have low partner count. Women knowing this lie about their partner count.

    Men know that women are disgusted and repelled by men with a low partner count so they inflate their partner count if it is low. Women find very few things more of a turn-off than male virgins.

  • Yes they don't want to be judged. I personally think its more do the girls that care than the boys.

  • Yes because men cannot handle it. Either they think the number of partners is too high, or they start comparing themselves to any of the exes the woman may have had or they start judging the woman's sexual practices (she's done anal? participated in threesomes? done it in public?). Either way, male attitude after finding out about any of these changed adversely and they start subconsciously (or consciously) taking it out on the relationship. Best avoid it altogether. I just go by "don't ask don't tell" and if the guy and I are in the mood for something we agree on, we go for it, no second guessing.

    • men can handle it, women just don't like how men decide to deal with it(usually leaving the women) seems to me women can not handle facing the consequences of their actions

    • The women can, its the men that can't. Men get self conscious even if the woman has had only one - 2 partners yet the standard doesn't hold the same for men. In our society, its OK for a guy to be more promiscuous but when it comes to the ladies they are always judged. Frankly a persons sexual past should be of no consequence so long as they have no vinereal diseases or hidden children that they should disclose..

    • Thats what I'm saying men can handle women just don't like how men handle it, we tend to dump slutty women

  • They'll lie their asses off. I agree. I don't want a girl that cheats or has casual sex. I already know I'm f***ed.

    • lmao How is this a misogynistic question? @QA- What does "stretching the truth" mean in this question? It seems more like a ploy for girls to admit that they lie. I mean, you've either cheated or you haven't. You've either had casual sex or you haven't. Even the number. If you've had a dozen goes go in there and you said you've only had 3, that's still a lie. That's not stretching the truth. I don't get it.