I think you have it right. Insecurity and performance anxiety. Maybe he's smallish. Or maybe he doesn't last very long or (oh no!) has erectile dysfunction from anxiety.
My one size fits all cure? Tell him just how much you really, really want oral sex. Make yourself ready with hygiene and grooming. When he does it, help him to get it right and (I usually dislike this but not here) over-react your pleasure a little. Encourage him to be aggressive and dive right in and you probably will come that way or get close. Then hustle him onto his back and fvck him Cowgirl style fast and strongly. You will probably be sloppy-wet from the oral which will make for pleasure all around. Newsflash. Your wet vag puts out a flood of pheromones that will arouse him/make him hard while he is licking you. The fVcking event may not last long, but you will have had pleasure already and almost anything he can manage will be good enough.
is you b-fri the guy who JUST asked a question about being inexperienced and worrying about pleasing women? ;)
i think it could def be performance anxiety, especially if he isn't very experienced. just reassure him and treat it like it's not a big deal and sex is something that you can have fun with and enjoy together. there are SO many ways he can please you no matter what his performance concerns are.
Honestly, I don't think I take this as being an insecurity issue at all. ALL men are afraid that they won't please us sexually (they haven't really been taught how to really work with everything we got), just like women have the same fear of not pleasing the man we're with. It's not even really a fear...just more of a nervous, "I hope I can please them" thing.
The fact that he actually vocalized that to you, in my opinion, directly contradicts the insecurity question. Then again, if he's your all-around insecure type, then maybe you should ask yourself if you really want to be with someone like that, let alone sleep with them.
Yes, he's very insecure!!!! He goes on how nice I look compared to how scruffy he thinks he looks! and when I see him goes 'soz I look sh*t'
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he is really scared of meeting your standards
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