My boyfriend takes forever to come when I give him a HJ. Am I doing it wrong?

[Anonymous]

Since we haven't had sex yet, foreplay lasts a good while and my boyfriend usually fingers me while I give him a hj. The thing though is that he seems to take quite a while to come, even though he moans, breathes hard and seems to be enjoying himself. Is it that I'm not doing it properly or simply that guys don't get off that easily from just a hj, since they can satisfy themselves better than anyone else can.

[MrOracle]

First of all, girls are at a huge disadvantage with HJs. You can't compete with HIM; he's been perfecting his technique for years, and it will take you years of practice to compare. Plus, even in the best of situations, a HJ has somewhat limited appeal. Many guys don't want them at all.

But I understand where you're coming from, so here's how I can help:

- The wetter the better. Since you probably can't use enough spit to do the job, you need to get some sex lube and use that. Lube will make a HUGE difference.

- Vary between stroking, rotating, and squeezing. Remember: you're trying to simulate a vagina with your hand.

- Ask him for feedback. Different guys will like different things, and maybe he's been too afraid to give you pointers. You may need to go faster or slower, use more or less grip pressure, or whatever.

HJs CAN be enjoyable, but it will take some work, and some lube, before you get there.

Normally I don't suggest p*rn for sex pointers, but try to find some HJ videos of Aurora Snow. She's got some technique!

[vdawg]

I can honestly say that I've NEVER gotten off from a hj. It's not that it doesn't feel good, but there's a mental block we men have that just won't let it happen! In our subconscious we are thinking of much warmer and wetter climates, that's all I can come up with! For his sake, move forward with the bj ASAP...LOL

[Anonymous]

maybe. I suck at giving handjobs. I don't have a firm grip in general and my ex told me that I didn't know how to hold a d*** because of that lol

[moneyman1029]

You are doing it wrong, because only he can perform his own rhythm that he likes. The only reason he gets off is because it is you touching him, not the action really.

Not your fault really.

[Asker]

Well obviously, it makes sense. Do you think there anything I could do to make it better or I'll just have to wait until we can move to bj or intercourse?

[moneyman1029]

try lube, maybe try and watch him for a bit ;)

[NerdInDenial]

If he isn't complaining, you're doing it fine.

[Anonymous]

some guys just don't get off that easily with a hj. but you could try doing it with a better grip.

[Anonymous]

To be completely honest, I don't know if he is really into it. He gets hand jobs from himself all of the time, and he's much better at it.

[Anonymous]

Have him put his hand over yours once and tell him to move it at the speed he does it to himself so then you'll know. I always go faster and harder when I'm getting close to orgasm so if you've been doing it for a few minutes and he moans try speeding up so that his almost there moan turns to an orgasm moan.