Sexual Health
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My girlfriend doesn't like to swallow

First off. I've been dating my girlfriend for nearly 2yrs. I love her to death. And this matter is in no way a deal breaker. I will be with her regardless either way, but... She doesn't like to swallow when I climax during oral sex. She says she doesn't like the way it feels in her mouth (although she loves pre come in her mouth [is there a difference]) Ladies: How would you feel about a guy asking you if you would swallow? Is there anything they could say, or a way that they could say it that would make you consider it? How do I broach this conversation as just that, a conversation? I don't want to make it a fight or for her to feel like I don't appreciate what she already does...It's just that. It turns me on when a girl swallows and it's annoying and not sex to have to clean jizz off myself
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Most Helpful Girls

  • Maybe it's just me. But this is one area in which I think girls need to get over themselves. The truth is that most guys would go to incredible lengths and do almost anything to pleasure their girl, and sometimes it might even involve doing things they're not totally into.

    Sex is about give and take. I'm sure you do things that you might not especially like to pleasure your girlfriend, and she should be wiling to do the same. What are a few seconds of discomfort when the result is pleasing your loved one. Honestly, if my significant other was so opposed to my bodily fluids I would question the depth of our love for each other.

    I would definitely bring up the subject, especially if it's important enough to you that you're seeking advice about it. If you guys have been dating for two years you should be at a point where this kind of conversation is totally appropriate. Maybe bring it up in a way that addresses the more emotional aspect of the whole thing. Don't tell her that you just want her to do it because it's super hot and it'll help you get your rocks off. Talk to her about how it will make you feel more accepted and loved by her (assuming this is actually the case). She'll be much more likely to respond positively if you don't make this all about you getting off.

  • I hate to use this argument, but... you probably wouldn't enjoy it, either. I'm aware many girls do like to swallow (I'm one of them) but sometimes it helps to just try to put yourself in her shoes. You know how some people just loathe the consistency of certain foods? It's just their personal taste and they can't help it.

    The jizz doesn't have to end up being on YOU, how does she feel about boobs, butt, stomach, face, thighs... There are so many possibilities that both of you could end up very happy with.

    If it's super important to you, I guess I would try asking her if it would help to be farther in her mouth when you orgasm. That's what my boyfriend and I do when he's been eating like crap lately and we KNOW it'll taste bad, haha. If it's deep in there, the jizz doesn't even touch my tongue.

    • Thanks. I wish it was just taste but that doesn't seem to be the case. I do put myself in her shoes (after all I get a mouth full in and lips covered in vaginal mucus every time I go down on her don't I) and that's why I don't bring it up or try to pressure her... thank you very much for the answer

  • I mean, I swallow because I really don't mind it. But some of my friends are so against it like, it's the worst thing ever. I think that if she's got her mind made up that's it's terrible then it's gonna be like, really hard for her to get over it if that's what she's focused on, you know? I just try to focus on doing something nice, and swallowing like, as fast as possible, lol. Oh and yes there is a big difference between come and like...pre. But idk, if she still lets you finish in her mouth then she's still going to feel it even if she doesn't swallow. I try to tell my friends that but they never listen to me... I guess everyone is different! :o)

    • thanks! very helpful

    • Sure :o)

Most Helpful Guys

  • "The difference between your new job and your new wife is that after 5 years, your job will still suck."

    You are lucky to get oral to completion at all after 2 years, and trust me, you don't get it forever. Don't make it an unpleasant experience for her and she might keep doing it longer.

    • I hope that isn't true across the board. I won't break up with her for not swallowing, but we will have to have a serious conversation if blow-jobs are suddenly obsolete

    • Would you consider it as serious as if you don't want to give her oral?

    • why would I stop performing oral on her? I don't see any reason why I would suddenly stop doing something for her I enjoy

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  • join the club bro, join the club

    heres what you do. you replace a meal everyday with fruit, eat a lot of pineapple, avoid too much spicy or greasy food, and, well, she'll still probably refuse to swallow

    if she isn't in to it she isn't into it, plain and simple

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What Girls & Guys Said

9 1

  • I always swallow because I like it and I'm used to it. But if she doesn't like it and doesn't want to do her, ask if her chest is OK - most guys like that and most girls don't mind.

  • It does not bother me at all. But she may never like it. I would not use the reason that you didn't have to clean up. You can drink pineapple juice to help with the taste. Good luck.

    • I wish taste was the issue. I have read sugars (fruits, candy, etc) can improve the flavor while veggies particularly green one's can make it sour or something. It seems like her issue is more with the consistency or sticky aspect being in her mouth

  • Let her know that it's important to you. I don't mind it that much at all, but I know by boyfriend likes it, which makes it worth it to me.

  • I don't know if you are going to be able to breach the subject and get her to like it.

    She's obviously past the point where she's still trying to please you and attempting to swallow it. You either like it or you don't.

    She might try it a few times to see if she can handle it/swallow it, but I doubt if she hates it, she'll want to keep doing it.

  • If you haven't already broached the subject, ask her without pressuring if she would be willing to try swallowing a small amount to start. For example cum on her boobs to end the BJ and then see if she's willing to lick the last drop off your dick. If she is, move up slowly from that by asking her if she is okay with one squirt into her mouth to swallow and the rest on her boobs. If she has a problem with the flavor/smell ask if she's willing to experiment with changes in your diet, such as drinking pineapple juice. Perhaps she'd be okay with you cumming in her mouth, just not swallowing like many porn stars do and letting it trickle onto her boobs. If she's just not into it you should drop the subject.

  • I applaud you for being with her regardless.

    Anyways, I'm not gonna do something I am not comfortable with. Perhaps I would reconsider if their was an alternative. He could come on other parts of my body, even lips cause that's close,or I could have the jizz in my mouth and when your not looking spit it out Lol.

    • well I'd never let something as small as where the jizz goes be a relationship deal breaker.

  • Well, I am sure there are plenty of things you don't like doing too during sex.

    Why can't you accept that she doesn't like doing that?

    • I have accepted it. 2yrs remember. I was just asking if there was a way I could bring it up with her. And people's opinion. Thanks for your oh so constructive advice

    • If you HAD accepted it, there would be NO reason to bring it up. You would only make her feel bad about it.

    • we accept that violence is in our culture, it doesn't mean we don't discuss it right? We accept that objectification of women is reality it doesn't mean we don't discuss how we can fix or change it right? I don't want her to feel bad, I love her, and I want her to know that it's just a conversation (because I love her), that's why I'm asking how I could bring it up.

  • Pre-come tastes a lot nicer.

    There are women who don't like to do it. I don't mind to do it occasionally if I'm really turned on but wouldn't want to do it each time. I kind of have to be in the mood for it.

    If she's already told you she doesn't like it in her mouth then I'm not sure what you can do to change her mind.

  • I refuse to swallow too. Nothing you can do about it and don't force her to do it if she doesn't want to like to

    • I've been with her for 2 years. I've never forced her to do anything and asked to find out if there was a way I could talk to her about it

    • may I ask you why you don't want to? Just out of pure curiosity.

    • Not my thing. I find it gross and I'm not into it

    • Show All

  • Guys too often ask about swallowing! Personally I think swallowing makes more sense if it's in your mouth already but there are a lot of girls who just can't do it! Maybe try flavored lube, or whip cream or something see if then she can swallow! If not just leave it! It'd be like her pushing you to eat a food you absolutely hate!

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