My girlfriend is pissed at me because I said 'eww' when she told me how many dudes she's banged!

My girlfriend told me today that she's banged 8 dudes before me while I've only slept with 2 chicks. When she told me I said eewww, I didn't mean to, it just came out unwillingly and she got very angry at me. She told me I made her feel dirty and I responded by telling her that it was kinda dirty and grossed me out (big mistake). Then she was all like "its not my fault" to which I responded by pointing out her lack of discipline (bigger mistake). So then she started crying and left my apartment...should I apologize? Truthfully speaking my image of her is tarnished because I feel like she's used goods. she's making me out to be the bad guy and refuses to see my point of view. I told her I was sorry but she's being an unreasonable bitch, how do I calm her down?
Updates:
+1 y
So my girlfriend gave me a handwritten note saying that she loved me and wished that I could have been her first. So yeah I probably won't break up with her...yet. I'm thinking if I find another girl who is less experienced ill make a move. But for now ill stay.
0 1

Most Helpful Girls

  • I don't care if she "did it to herself", like some other answerers have said. What you said was insulting, & no, she doesn't have to "get over it".

    For example, there are plenty of overweight people in this world, & regardless of if it's "technically" their fault, it's still insulting to call them "fat" to their faces, right? Common sense.

    What people don't understand is that NO ONE in this world is perfect. & just because they aren't perfect doesn't give you a right to verbally insult them on their imperfections that have done nothing to harm you or anyone else in any way. & if you think it's okay to do so, then that says more about you then it does her.

    Maybe you don't want a woman with that many sex partners. Fair enough. But keep your reactions to yourself, think about it, & THEN make a rational judgment about whether or not you want to stay with her. But just to let you know, there are people (not just women) in your age range that have had way more partners than 8 people.

    I don't know how long you've been with this girl, but like Misty said, women have way more to offer than their vagina, & you should know this if you've been with her for a long time & you truly care about her.

    If you want to stay with this girl, you owe her a SERIOUS apology. Your mindset of her being "used goods" definitely came out when you said "ewww" & I'm sure she sensed it. If I was her, I probably would've ended the relationship myself.

    Heck, you're "used goods" too. You're not a virgin.

    • I strongly agree with what you said! Especially this part : "if you think it's okay to do so, then that says more about you then it does her." If he doesn't want a girlfriend with 8 previous partners then he needs to stop wasting this woman's time.

    • I wish I could agree with this more than once.

    • This.

    • Show All
  • You have a right to feel that way about her history, but it was very insensitive to respond the way you did. Of COURSE she's insulted. You are judging her for her past, which she can't go back and change, and your word choice speaks for itself- how would you feel if you told someone something about yourself, and they responded with an "eww"? It's totally natural for her to feel bad. If you still want to be with her, you're going to have to take the blame and apologize for your remarks. You also have to be able to accept the number of people she's slept with, because you can't have a healthy relationship with her if you don't respect her. So it's up to you. Maybe it was wrong of her to sleep with that many people, or maybe it wasn't, but regardless, your knowing about it doesn't change the person she is. Disapproving of her past doesn't give you the right to be rude or insult her. If your feelings have changed, break up with her, but she is not wrong for getting upset and you need to respect her feelings.

    • Maybe your right, but I can't shake the feeling of disapointment with her.

    • Well, find a way to shake it, or end the relationship. Because you have a right to break up with her if you're not happy, but you don't have a right to stay around and disrespect her.

    • You're right, I've lost respect for her. It think itll be hard to regain it, I find myself loving her a lot less.

    • Show All
  • It makes sense how that made her upset. That, to some, is a sensitive issue and comments like that are going to upset people. So, you could say what you said, the "ew" came out accidentally, like you stated above. That may "calm her down."

    And really, if your girlfriend is "used goods" and a "unreasonable bitch" why are you with her if you feel that way?

    • I didn't really feel that way until I found out about her past.

    • That's not her now though. And at your update, your just staying with her until you find someone else? That's terrible! Don't lead her on! Just end it now.

Most Helpful Guys

  • its a lot but whatever. In this day in age your not gonna find a girl who hasn't been with a few guys before you. I mean, you can, but a lot of times you wont

    she's been with a lot, and you have every right to be concerned. your reaction may have been a bit harsh though.

    if this is a serious relationship and youve been together a while, I say work it out, and get over it.

    if its only been short term so far, and you aren't comfortable, then get over her.

    • I think I'm going to try to convince her to let me bang a few chicks to catch up...im not sure how she'll react.

    • if that's a serious response than you won't have a girlfriend for long. its sounds to me like its not her having banged 8 guys, its that your insecure about only banging 2 girls, so your pushing it on her. here's a hint, she doesn't care about that, and neither should you. just focus on the now. But honestly, you sound like you got some problems to work out before you get in a relationship with anyone

    • My only problem is that my girlfriend is kind of a slut...my worst nightmare!

    • Show All
  • You're entitled to believe what you want. If you think she is damaged goods then fair enough. You can't help what you're attracted to. Perhaps you should leave her, it doesn't sound like you two are a very good match.

    • I find it ironic that some of these women are calling you judgemental, when in reality the human female is arguably the most judgmental creature on this planet.

    • I don't believe anyone here said women cannot be judgmental.. if you don't think he's being judgmental then that's your opinion. I gave you an up vote and then I saw your comment.. V

    • Yeah all the chicks who are attacking me probably have a lot of dudes in their past. I feel like I'm the victim and can't understand why she's so pissed and unreasonable.

    • Show All

Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions

What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!

What Girls & Guys Said

14 6
  • Yeah, big mistake. I really do not believe that someone's past really defines them. If you can't get over that then it is pointless. I really think you should apologize if you want to stay in a relationship with her. You made her feel horrible about herself for something she cannot change.

    • On the contrary I think our past shapes who we are, and her past took me by surprise, and disgust.

    • So you don't believe that people change? You liked her for her personality, right? So don't hold something against her when she didn't even do it while you were together. The past is the past, you can either get over it because you like her for her personality, or concentrate on something unchangeable.

    • I think people can change but her dirty past will reflect on me as a guy. A guy who thinks its acceptable to be in a relationship with a slutty girl when I never behaved that way myself. I don't want to overlook more dignified girls over slutt ones.

    • Show All
  • I dont know why all the hate is about. He has the right to have is opinion, no? I mean, I would be turn off if a girl told me she slept with 8 or more guys, but I would make sure I kinda know before getting to emotionally involved in a relation. Thats just me, girls who had 5+ partner and are not even 20 is a huge turn off for me. Does that make me a douche? If yes, this world is sad

  • "used goods"? Are you kidding or just a complete moron. Women have more to offer than just sex and it doesn't affect her value as a person. Sounds like you aren't mature enough to handle a relationship and should probably do her a favour by ending it.

    • +1

    • It does kinda affect her value to me, it made me sick and I'm disappointed in her. And I think I'm mature by the fact that I didn't just sleep with anyone who I felt attracted to. I think sex is very personal and I thought I was with girls who chose carefully like me; it seems I chose wrong.

  • Bro, if you're going to continue to be this judgmental, how do you expect her to tell you anything else that's personal? She's going to keep recoiling and never trust you with anything like that again in fear that she will be judged. Not only did you make her feel dirty, you made her ashamed of herself and probably less of a person. I highly suggest you apologize and try to salvage what trust you can. Good luck.

    • I don't think there's anything else she can tell me that would make me feel this bad.

    • You'd be surprised how dark and deep secrets can get. Just be aware...

    • I totally agree

  • If that's the kind of thing that's important to you, then you really should have had this discussion earlier.

    And your update makes you just sound like a piece of shit so I hope she does the same and moves on to a dude with more experience since he's probs a better fuck.

  • It seems like a large number but really she's in control of her sexuality , tbh what does it matter if you both actually care about eachother, unless you don't care about her.. she deserves better

  • yea I can see why she got mad but she's just gonna have to deal with it because she's the one that slept with all those people and she has to deal with that. just tell her you are sorry and you understand why she got mad at you even though if you don't some girls are just get like that but give her time she'll be ok

    • Yeah I think if she decided to be loose like that, its her penance to deal with. She shouldn't be mad at me, she should be mad at herself.

  • Ur being judgmental

    • Am i?

  • LOL. do you think you'll even be able to get over her sexual history? it seems like you won't. so end the relationship and let her find someone who isn't so judgmental.

    • Do you think I should try to sleep with more chicks? Could I convince her to let me sleep with other chicks to catch up?

  • I would never end up getting into a relationship with an idiot like you in the first place. But IF I did (unknowingly), I would definitely break up the second I found out that your of that kind. I'm being honest. Just an FYI, you are the one with lack of disciplines, not her! YOU are the "unreasonable bitch", not her! You will know why I am saying so in a good couple of years. You have a lot of growing up to do. MegaLulz at your high level of stupidity.

    • i gave you a up arrow! completely agreed

    • I am disciplined, and personally I think it speaks volumes about her character.

    • Why because mama told you so? This way of thinking won't get you far, I hope for your own sake that you grow from it soon. Good luck

    • Show All
  • @Update: I am judging you when I say you're a bad person..

    • So you WOULDNT go out with me?

  • I am surprised she didn't break up with you. I understand you made a mistake but you're sticking to the fact that you think she is "used goods".

    • Yeah I lost a bit of respect for her.

  • I do believe it could be worse, she could have slept with many, many more people. However, you should have been more considerate of her feelings. She might have been insecure about her past, and you just made it worse. You should apologize and realize that what you did was wrong.

    • I agree, I shouldve been more in control of my disgust. I honestly thought she had more character than that. Now I feel like I need to catch up.

    • People can have good character but still make bad decisions.

    • Yeah but that's A LOT of bad decisions!

    • Show All
  • Hey, you're not the one making her feel like a dirty bitch, she did that to herself.

    • Yeah I agree, I don't see her as a prized possesion anymore. My view of her as a respectable woman is askew.

  • I think 8 partners is a non-excessive amount (especially for women)... you should relax man

    • Dude, I have one before her, she has eight! That grossed me out.

    • I think women are overly promiscuous and nonchalant about it as well - but 8 partners really isn't that high of a number (unless it's within the course of just one year)

    • Its high when I've only slept with her and one other girl.

    • Show All
  • Get over it. Guys are just jealous because it is so much easier for us to have sex than you.

  • She said 8, so it's probably 16. Though 2 at your age is also pretty slutty lol.

    • God I hope she wasn't lying! And yeah she's 21...she was a little slutty.

    • So are you buddy :P

  • What about a guy who claims he has had 100+ partner at 23?

    • Thats disgusting.

    • Now that's a whore IMO

  • dump her. 8 partners at age of 18-24 is way to much...thats a lot of one night stands.

    • I know right! I kinda resent her for being so easy. I think I deserve a girl who has a little less mileage.

  • You're a d***. Even if the eewwww came out involuntarily, you made the decision to ask, and you made the decision to say it was kinda dirty.

    • I asked because after a year of dating I wanted to get a little more serious with her. It is dirty imo and if I'm going to make a commitment I think o deserve to know what kind of person I'm dealing with.