Sexual Health
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Roommate spying on me, should I ask him to move out?

My roommate was supposed to be out of town yesterday so I wanted to have some private time. I had just taken a shower and was in the mood, I laid down on my bed and turned some music on, I did not feel the need to close my door thinking I was home alone. I took my towel off and laid it over my face laying nude in my bed. I started masturbating while listening to my music, before I knew it almost 45 min had past before I finished myself off. I took the towel off my face and my roommate was standing in the living room watching me. As soon as I saw him he walked into his room. I have no idea how long he was standing there. I was terrified. I got dressed and left the house. When I came home later that night he was asleep and then went to work this AM before I got up. How do I address this situation to him. He has only seen me in bra and panties because that's what I sometimes wear around the house. A far cry from watching me masturbate. What should I do
0 1

Most Helpful Guys

  • Well, even if he greatly respected your privacy and didn't watch you masturbate, he would still catch a glimpse of you as he went to his room, since your door was open.

    So, no matter what he did, this was going to happen.

    I would put the blame more on your negligence than his intrusion. Closing a door was the easiest way out here.

    Plus, if he was actually in the house when you started masturbating, he might have thought that you deliberately left the door open. Especially when you are already wandering around half-naked around him.

    You can't really be mad at him in this situation. So think things through for a while, and do not make hasty decisions.

    I have a rule that I call a "7-day-rule": When faced with a serious problem, or an important decision to make, I wait for 7 days before finally deciding, unless the situation requires an immediate decision (which it doesn't in your case).

    Wait for at least a week. See if you still feel as bad about everything. May be things will get less awkward with time, and both of you will forget about it.(or at least never mention it) and move on. If you see absolutely no progress after a week, then consider a serious decision such as moving out. But first, wait it out for a while.

    Also, talking to him about this is a great idea. I think it is safe to assume that he has seen everything there is to see, so you can't really make things worse by talking about it. You can only make things better. You can apologize for leaving your door open, or let him apologize for intruding your privacy, or just mutually agree to never mention this to anyone.

    So, to conclude:

    - Don't blame him for what happened. You are also in the blame here.

    - Don't make hasty decisions. Wait for a week or so and let things cool down.

    - If you can, have a talk with him. It can only make things better.

    And finally, don't forget that, although things progressed in the most undesirable way, don't forget that you weren't doing anything wrong, so, from an unrealistically optimistic perspective, you don't need to feel embarrassed for doing something that almost everyone around you does. Just be more careful next time.

    Alright, good luck with your roommate now... =)

  • You are just gonna have to let it go/get over it, and pretend/act like it never happened. Not mentioning anything about it should increase the chance of him keeping this occurance between you two, and no one else. Next time, check the apartment to make sure nobody else is home, and lock the door.

Most Helpful Girls

  • Really is nothing to be done about it now. If you wanted privacy should have closed the door. Truth is you probably left the door open so he could see what's under that bra and panties. And why not exhibitionism if one hell of a turn on.

    Seriously, if he walked in on you masturbating do you think any straight guy is going to not look? Of course he will look, he will be as silent as possible so he can watch you for as long as possible. Guys are EXTREMELY visual and a girl masturbating is more eye candy than any guy could possibly resist. Take heart, he has probably masturbated countless times thinking about what he saw.

    Seems like a win-win.

    Worst case scenario, he tells everyone he saw you masturbating. So what! Big deal! Everyone masturbates.

    Best case scenario, he tells no one and returns the favor for you.

    • LOL ya I like your answer. I have been more horny now that he has seen me that way, I like thinking about what he his probably doing in his room since he saw me

    • Tell him you know he saw and that you know what he does in the shower thinking about it. And that it would only be fair for him to return the favor. I guarantee he will be more than happy to do so. Its pretty hot watching a guy pull his penis. Love watching them flex all their muscles right before they cum; then seeing them cum; then to go to total relaxation. So hot.

  • Ya but you should not have walked around the house in your bra either now he may think its OK to watch you do those things. These are the kinds of things you have to be careful with when you live with a guy. But anyways ide be pissed off too he seems strange ide ask him to move out and find a woman to live with this is odd behavior. I know ide feel humiliate and betrayed, which I'm sure you do but who knows what else he can do. If you decide that he should stay then be more careful and keep your distance.

    • Ya I think I will keep the door closed and locked next time I feel the need for some alone time.

    • Well just make sure you keep your distance.

  • Katie64 gave you some very good advice. The other thing is if you are running around the house in bra and panties with him there, my thinking in my mind would be that in the back of your mind you want him to f*ck you. I run around with less than that sometimes and I know the guys know that I am looking for a penis injection!

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What Girls & Guys Said

4 3

  • So you are a lone woman, with a male roommate, who routinely walks around in her bra and panties in front of said roommate, you laid in your bed nude masturbating with the door open even when you don't live by yourself and sometimes people can be home unexpectedly...seriously? Get over it and f*** him already

  • There's not much you can do as you chose to leave your door open, and he has a right to be there, the chances are he won't ever mention it to you if he is mature enough to understand what this could do to you, so try and convince yourself, he didn't see you, don't let it bother you, carry on as normal, apart from learning to shut your door in the future, there's not much he has done wrong, x

  • you walk around in a bra and panties?...you sound like an excellent roommate.

    • Yes and with the exception of when I wear thongs, its not really and diff then a bikini. I really only do it cause he is super cute.

    • it's things like this that confuse the crap out of me (am sure am not the only one). Let's look at this logically: You are attracted to him so you decided to walk around the house in your bathing suit to impress him (what do you think is going through his head?), then you are surprised that he is probably interested in you and watched you masterbate. Am not saying you're at fault, just you have no right to be upset or surprised.

    • Ya maybe he did not do anything wrong. Its not such as big of a deal him seeing me do that as it is just me being so embarrassed cause I was being a little louder than normal and was really getting into the motion of masturbating so I feel it was making a fool of myself. I think if he saw me just doing it normal I would not be as embarrassed. And now I think about it most guys would try to watch a girl doing that.

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  • nothing you can do. what was done is done. next time go to your room and close the door when you want alone time

  • lol, id say make it a regular thing. I love guys watching me play.

    • I love watching :)

  • Wow talk about awkward situation... I guess your only options are to continue living like nothing happened, move out and pretend like he was never in your life, or talk about it with him.

  • This is why you don't get a male roommate unless he's your boyfriend lol.

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