Should I take my own virginity or should I wait?

[Anonymous]

I know you can´t take your own virginity, I just didn´t know another way to answer this question. My best friend knows I´m a virgin and she gave me as a birthday present (I turned 23 last week) vibrator shaped like a penis. I´ve been looking at it since my birthday and it´s been kind of difficult for me to use it for the first time. On one hand I think doing this is great because it will not hurt when I have sex for the first time, but on the other hand, I´m afraid of doing something that I have the feeling is a lot better to do when someone you like is around. I´m afraid I´m going to be sad if I do it because, even though I will still be a virgin, for a girl having something inside her for the first time is not something that happens everyday. I´m also afraid of the fact that the guy I will have sex with for the first time won´t consider it as something special because I´ve already been using a dildo. Do guys like the actual act of entering a girl for the first time? or it doesn´t mean anything?

[Bloogoo]

Hi... and you can now take a deep breath... and relax.

My 1st response is: go for it!

It means NOTHING to us guys whether you have used a toy before... not at all! Using a toy has nothing to do with your virginity anyway. It's a toy.

Only a very religious type guy might even object to some other GUY having gotten there first. For most men- we actually kind of expect all that, even.

Many- if not most- girls lose their virginity (or hymen) early. It's usually pretty rare we guys ever get to be # 1.

There's absolutely no way for us to know- aside from you having an intact hymen- what your "past" has been... unless you tell us. Once again- only a hyper- religious person usually makes any sort of issue out of that.

If YOU'RE not hyper religious (and you don't WANT someone who is) then you will quite honestly be doing the 1st guy a FAVOR if you deal with all that 1st.

You solve both the pain and (possible) blood issues. You can feel exactly how things feel inside... go at your own pace... and vupti! It will be over in seconds. You will later then know what to expect. You will look forward to the real thing, as opposed to clenching in fear or anxiety when the time comes, as some girls do.

But hopefully some girls will respond to your question as well. They can address all this better than I can.

My attitude it- there is absolutely NO need to wait at all! The more ready and willing and up for it you are (anytime) the happier your partner will be... including your first one. Experience ALWAYS pays off... ANY experience!

Enjoy... and then give your best friend a nice, big hug after you have tried it... and learned to love it. Most girls LOVE their buzzy little friends.

BTW... don't neglect the clitoris (in case that simply hasn't occurred to you). Buzzing that area will do a HELL of a lot more than buzzing inside you, if you're like most girls I've ever known... but you can try having it inside and using your fingers- or a 2nd vibrator, sometime...

[Anonymous]

Some guys like breaking hymens. Some guys don't. Some guys have no strong opinions either way.

Of course, just because you haven't been penetrated before, that doesn't mean you have a hymen. It could have broken off from rigorous exercise for example. If you don't have a hymen, it'll be of less significance anyway.

If you're at all curious to be penetrated, use the vibrator. If you feel like using it because you'd feel bad for your friend if you didn't, then don't do it.

But, the bigger question (assuming you do want a boyfriend) is why hasn't it happened yet? My guess is you're not meeting new guys very often. And, when you meet new guys you do like, you're not giving any indications to him that you like him. Most girls in your situation seem to have either or both problems.

[Asker]

I have both problems, yes. Trust me, I would give anything just to have sex.

[Opinion Owner]

That said, it's less easy to meet new guys the less urban your area is. Being able to meet new people easily is one of the perks of living in a big city.

[amandalauren]

Girl just wait until you meet a guy. A vibrator is not thr same and it will hurt. You will also feel like you lost something with out giving it away to someone. It will feel awkward when you do tell a guy oh I've never had sex but I've used a vibrator. Most women dont use vibrators until after they have lost their virginity. So in my opinion just wait till you meet a guy you care for and dont rush it bc you will regret it in the end. Also most guys are gonna love the fact you saved yourself. Go on some dating sites. I used zoosk. To find the man of my dreams and we have been together ever sense. We now are engaged own a house together and have. Baby on the way. I never thought I would meet the right guy. But respected myself and waited for the right guy. Good luck

[Anonymous]

I say Go for it I am also 22 years old and a virgin I just tried my dildo 20 minutes ago and boom it wasn’t as painful as I thought and I still feel the same. I think it would be easier once I have the real thing. Go for it!!! I did it.

[ladsin]

damn 23 and no sex? sad life... but use it, I don't know whatever you wanna do

[Dionysos]

Do what YOU want to do with your hymen. Don't take our advice.

As a guy, the idea of being the first guy to make love to a girl is a turn on. A painful unpleasant bloody experience... not so much.

[dudeman]

i don't think that would be taking your virginity but by all means use the vibrator

[Anonymous]

If you take your own virginity you can only get stupid/weak guys who believe that garbage that you didn't take it.

[Anonymous]

The idea of taking a girls virginity is a pleasing one, however I would like that to be just as good for her and not painful

[Anonymous]

i don't care if she has already had a dildo or a d*** inside her if I m not going to marry her. but I expect my wife to not have a dildo or d***s inside her other than mine.