Sexual Health
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Why Abstinence Isn't the Best Option to Preventing Pregnancy and STD's

"Well, I think that abstinence has its place as part of a comprehensive health and sex education curriculum. It would be wrong to exclude abstinence from a health curriculum, because there are some potentially very serious ramifications for early sexual activity."
Kerry Healey, BrainyQuote.com

Why Abstinence Isn't the Best Option to Preventing Pregnancy and STD's

A lot of people push abstinence on adolescents and teens, and I can completely understand why. Early sex is unhealthy and repugnant. But it is also very, very common today. Amino's dedicated to sexual roleplay and entire websites made for teens. It's sad. But can we stop it? Simple answer folks, we can't. Think about this, if you are a teen , or you are an adult, you know. Teens are stubborn, they do what they want to, no matter the cost. Even the angel children who do no wrong stray from perfect behavior. Teens will go to extreme lengths. So abstinence just isn't a healthy idea. No teen is going to be abstinent, no matter how much they vow and pledge. So why push it?

Why Abstinence Isn't the Best Option to Preventing Pregnancy and STD's

Teens often feel internal pressure to do the things that they think their peers are doing.

And unfortunately, A lot of teens have lost their virginity these days. They don't know what control is. But what can parents do, put their child on lockdown? NO, you shouldn't make your child miserable and coddle them by keeping them hidden from the world, Teens who are kept on lockdown are a lot more likely to sneak out and cause a lot more trouble than those who are allowed to experience the world. They also tend to get teased a lot more, due to being socially deprived.

Why Abstinence Isn't the Best Option to Preventing Pregnancy and STD's

So, do yourself and your kids a favor and don't push abstinence, let them experience the world, and, to keep them safe, give them condoms when they are old enough, and if you have a female child, birth control. Don't hold your kids back from enjoying life wile they can. If you hold them back for too long, it could be bad for both sides.

Thanks for reading myTake.

1 4

Most Helpful Girl

  • probably sex ed might help, probably not.. anyways when you are tenager you are starting to be curious about your own body and especially those of the opposite sex.. besides, young girls and boys, especially in poor, rural counties, don't all have access to the internet where they can read about all sex related things and issues.. the problem is educators are directed not to mention sex. in many of the neediest places, they may speak of abstinence and nothing more.. not quite sure a teenager with hormone rush will actually stick to abstinence

Most Helpful Guy

  • Abstinence is like if you don't leave your house than you will never get car accident (or just really low chance).

    If you don't eat you will not get food poisoning.

    If you are undead then you won't be dead...

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  • "But can we stop it? Simple answer folks, we can't. Think about this, if you are a teen , or you are an adult, you know. Teens are stubborn, they do what they want to, no matter the cost. Even the angel children who do no wrong stray from perfect behavior. Teens will go to extreme lengths. So abstinence just isn't a healthy idea. No teen is going to be abstinent, no matter how much they vow and pledge. So why push it?"

    Because what your saying is a LIE. To have sex is a personal choice. Nobody can force you to have sex and neither can somebody force you not to. To wait until marriage to have sex is not the problem. It's being told to wait until your late 20's or early 30's and have a career, lots of money, etc to get married. All things that would be meaningless in a marriage. You can NEVER have too much money or too little for a baby. Or a house, apartment, and anything depending on what YOU and that PERSON decide to do.

    Sex outside of marriage is WRONG. Period. There is a very serious reason why one should wait for marriage. I lost my mom to cervical cancer that came from her having HPV. She lost her virginity at 13 from a guy who had sex before her with 5 prostitutes. He never told her. She had to find out by 2 unexpected way. 1. getting sick and having symptoms that she had to go the doctor. And 2. one of his buddies revealing himself to her and her close friend, showing the warts from the very top. Condoms and birth control CANNOT SAVE YOU. The Shots cannot SAVE YOU.

    Plenty of studies have proven against premarital sex, because why? It's raising divorce rates UP! Now we have more resistant STD's that cannot be properly contained with antibiotics.

    " But can we stop it?" YES. By TELLING THEM THE TRUTH! Tell them about your experiences, the pain, the suffering. Stop being cowards and hiding your sexual shame from the past, and tell them: "Yes, I had premarital sex. Yes, I had my heart broken and I felt used. Yes, I ended up with 5+ partners and it all didn't work out. And your father and I are struggling in our marriage/etc." Instead of being humble, you're proud of your sexual status. And you don't bother encouraging belief in your children to NOT desire to seek these things. Kids and teen have sex because the world pressures them. And it's worse when parents lack belief in them to wait too. It's not just disrespectful, it's disgusting to know how your own parents would force you to have sex because they will assume your gay or lesbian.

    • They will do it more because once they find out the truth, even if you do encourage abstinence until marriage, you'll be a hypocrite. And now, not only did you damage your kids life, but the relationship you have with them. I am a virgin. And i was never physically pressured to have sex. Because I knew better. I know myself. I know what God has established. Nobody in church had to force it down my throat. The moment I picked up my first adult Bible at 9/10 and read it myself, I already made that vow. By myself. My choice. Nobody else's. And I know others who are Christian or not who also made that vow by themselves. So I don't want to hear that petty weak excuse bullcrap about how it can't be done. It's a CHOICE. And we're all are given CHOICES. "Think about this, if you are a teen , or you are an adult, you know. Teens are stubborn..." WRONG. I was once a teen myself. My parents had no issues with me being stubborn to do things. It was something I personally wanted to do.

    • Stubbornness is a personality and character trait. Let's leave the generalizations and bias excuses behind. We're adults here. We need to start acting like one. If that teen chooses to do whatever they want, they will continue to be like this for the rest of their lives if they don't change. And I've known plenty of people I grew up with that are still struggling because they did what they wanted. "Even the angel children who do no wrong stray from perfect behavior." No that is a major lie. Nobody is perfect, period. But if you don't reinforce your role as a parent and give your child the tools needed to learn personal responsibility, what do you THINK will happen, if they don't already have obedience inside of them? Everybody get's tempted. Temptation is not the problem, it's what you choose to do after you've been tempted. If teens could get married like in the days of old when there was no such things as TEENS, but 13-year-old women and men, they would have no qualms waiting for

    • sex. Now the legal age for marriage 18 in the US. 16 with parental consent. I find it ironic that we can have the marital age set at 18, yet the legal age to have sex is far younger than that. Why make it younger than the marriageable age!!! Because they WANT you to have sex young. They WANT you to fail. It's done deliberately! And the ones who are sucking it up like fools are the people in society birthing and raising kids! They know exactly what they are doing. And if you're going to be stupid enough to puke your penis in a girl or woman and open up your legs to men your not married to, and you have no idea what you've done, you're a fool. Because now, guess who get's your paycheck from your error?: The Doctors, the Abortionist especially get paid 100K + figures for each successful abortion procedure, the Oncologist, for when you get cancer from an STD, and the ones who bury you after your choices took away your life.

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  • I totally agree. Sex is natural. Sex is good. In American Health education, a teacher will more or less just walk up to the class and go "the way to prevent blah blah and blah blah is to not have sex. The end." however, sex is a totally natural part of life, and most people are bound to do it at some point, regardless of what they teach you in school. It's human nature. We as a species need to repopulate, and sex is the way to do it. But because health classes don't teach students not only how to use protection meaning how to put on a condom, etc., but they don't even teach students how to have proper sex! Not many people in the world know how to have good sex, and this is because of poor education. It is partially the reason why rape is a problem. In countries such as France, their health class consists of learning in detail how to use condoms, and learning step by step how to actually have sex, such as the signs your partner will give, foreplay, etc. Americans learn this from porn, which is THE WORST place to learn how to have sex. It is why rape is not much of a problem in France and why French have good sex. And, curiosity is a strong strong emotion, and also within teenagers, defiance. Someone tells you not to have sex, you have sex. Simple as that. Teaching abstinence and only abstinence is terrible, because of course students want to and are going to have sex at some point. And because the education system doesn't teach students how to actually have sex, problems happen. They don't teach students how to use protection, and actually how to PROPERLY prevent bad things from happening during sex.

    • good response. i agree 100% that abstinence only sex ed is a disservice.

    • Read the opinion of btbc92

    • @Jenima As a response to her, I think that some people have sex improperly, as a result of our poor health education. Condoms do prevent bad things, and so do shots and all that stuff. It's not sex that causes bad things to happen, it's not taking the precautions needed before having sex. People need to get medical test records on STDs. They need to visit the doctor themselves and see if they can or cannot have sex. They need to learn how to put on a condom properly. They need to learn how to use birth control. They need to get their shots. And importantly, they need to learn how to have proper sex. That means talking to people, learning about consent and all that, and also how to actually have sex, meaning what to do when you are actually in the bed. Again, Americans don't know because of our poor health education. The woman mentioned in btbc92's opinion had sex at an inappropriate age, and she did it improperly. She should have understood that the man she was having sex with was not

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  • I agree that teaching kids about birth control options is really important. They should learn about condoms, STD prevention, and the wide variety of contraceptives (how effective they are and their pros and cons) that are available. Teens absolutely should be equipped with the knowledge and tools to allow them to have sex safely and responsibly, if they choose to become sexually active.

    But abstinence has a role to play as well. Teens should know that choosing not to have sex is perfectly okay, that it’s a valid option, and that it IS the absolute safest choice as far as avoiding pregnancy and STDs. Teens should be encouraged to wait to become sexually active until they are mature enough to handle the physical and emotional impacts. Most young teens have not reached that stage yet. It’s perfectly reasonable to encourage teens to wait to have sex.

    • I mean, technically, abstinence IS the best option for preventing pregnancy and STDs. It’s the ONLY method that is 100% effective. That’s worth teaching. Kids should know that abstinence is a great choice. But they should be taught effectively about other options too.

    • I agree, kids just... don't feel like holding back these days

    • Teens should have ALL the information. Excluding information on abstinence is just as problematic as excluding information about other options. Teens should be equipped with all the information available and encouraged to make the right choice for them as an individual. For many, that may be abstinence. Students should be taught that just because their peers are doing something does not mean that they necessarily should too.

  • It may be the best option for some people. Most people experience periods of intentional abstinence for many reasons.

    As a sexual health educator, I encourage people who want to be abstinent to learn what to do when they are done wanting to be abstinent, and support them in making choices to make abstinence easier for them. It is but one of several good ways to avoid pregnancy and disease.

    I don't believe most people want to remain abstinent long into their 20s though, even if they "believe" in it for moral/religious reasons. So everyone should have the basic knowledge of how to plan pregnancies, not let them just happen, and plan to avoid STDs.

    I don't think young unmarried people having sex is this huge national tragedy.

    Educating a person in human sexuality begins when they are children and teaching them how to communicate, what their body parts are named (properly), what reproduction is, and how to be in charge of their own bodies. And it's something that should continue throughout life.

    Abstinence is a normal part of human sexuality too, but no adult should be pretending that just telling everyone to keep their pants on is enough to prevent rape, pregnancy, STDs, etc.

  • We should be TEACHING Sex-Ed, and PREACHING Abstinence.

    I had mandatory sex ed in both 8th and 9th grade. And that's one of the main reasons that I waited until I was 20 before engaging in sex.

    I'm in an open relationship, I've had over 20 sex partners, and I've never in my life had a single STD or been pregnant. Because I was taught safe sex practices, and effective methods of contraception.

    Telling your kids to just completely avoid something doesn't teach them why they should avoid, it just robs them of valuable lessons to deal with it properly. It's like the old cliche says: if you don't talk to your kids about ___, then who will? Their friends. And there is pressure these days.

  • Sure teens will probably try to experiment, doesn't mean you endorse it. I mean people steal even though we have made it illegal, should we just make it legal? No. I mean what kind of rational is that, its going to happen any way so don't bother trying? The fact is your right that abstinence education is not going to stop every teenager, but that doesn't mean we pretend that promiscuity is okay either. We should be pointing out that the more partners you have the more likely you are to cheat, divorce, be unhappy in long term relationships etc. We should keep pointing out it can lead to pregnancy and STD's etc. We should encourage abstinence and then explain that if your going to be stupid at least be smart about it and use contraceptives. But that's not really what we get, its either abstinence or out right acceptance and that's not healthy either. Sex isn't evil, but its also not something to be taken lightly either.

  • Maybe, but the fact still remains that as a personal decision abstinence is the only thing guaranteed to keep you from getting STDs/STIs or pregnant so... while you make a fair point, the fundamental of you're safer not having sex with a lot of people if you want to avoid infection still applies.

  • its true that some teens go too far and can reject abstinence. I feel like I'm the only teen around that's still a virgin haha I've been around people before that can be pressuring about it to me, just because they think its all cool, but I'm just somebody who doesn't let them boss me around. I'm simply waiting for the right time with the right guy.

  • i agree that teaching abstinence only is not the best method of teaching sex education and prevention of STDs. there is plenty of research to prove that comprehensive sex education better serves adolescences

    BUT abstinence... not having sex is the best way to avoid pregnancy or STDs

    • Well, sometimes teens can't be abstinent

    • i agree 100%. that's why teaching abstinence only is not smart. and the evidence supports this. a comprehensive sexual education benefits teens far better than teaching abstinence only but abstinence. not having sex is the best way to avoid pregnancy or STD. that is indisputable. you are 100% guaranteed not to get an STD or pregnant if you don't have sex

    • read my opinion because its too long to post here

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  • Yup. I had abstinence only education.
    Abstinence only education is shown to not work, texas for example has the highest repeat teen pregnancy rates and they have abstinence only

  • Technically, Abstinence IS the Best Option to Preventing Pregnancy and STD's So is Cold Turkey the best option for ending alcoholism. They just may not always be workable in the real world.

  • Abstinence has its place as PART of sex education. It's an option among many options. It works just dandy for some, not for others. Pushing only one option for anything is a dangerous thing. I think abstinence should be encouraged, personally, since at that age there's certainly enough going on to keep you busy, but not pushed as if it's the only acceptable option.
    Also where does sexually transmitted diseases come into this? You can get HIV from other ways besides sex.

  • I half disagree. Properly teaching kids about safe sex is more important than teaching abstinence only, but abstinence should still be taught. It's the only 100% effective method of preventing STD's and pregnancies.

  • There is a total and complete lack of logic here. Abstinence is 100% the best option for preventing STDs and pregnancy, don't let this bullshit fool you.

  • Abstinence was a reasonable proposition in the old times when people married at 15 or so.

    • Thanks for reading

  • I think abstinence is outdated. I look @ Europe, and my cousins there are more open about sex and have had sex much earlier. Does Europe have higher rates of teen pregnancies; not necessarily, they have a much higher population and density. They are more mature about sex in Europe because they embrace it. In some European cultures, teens are expected to lose virginity at a young age. Yet, in North America, we laugh about sex as teens, and are taught that sex is bad, which confuses people. I remained abstinent as a teen and younger adult, and now I feel like I am behind. Sex, is part of human nature and people should be taught how to prevent STDs and pregnancy. I by no means think that abortion is a good thing, so why not prevent pregnancy, as our population is huge. People should be comfortable to explore sex and their bodies @ a young age.

  • Wrong. It is the best option for preventing both of those at any age.

  • So... refusing sex isn't the best way to prevent oneself from obtaining *sexually* transmitted diseases, and not getting someone pregnant.

    Interesting.

  • Speaking just for me, my parents didn't push abstinence on me and all I remember of sex ed in high school is the day we saw a slide show of STD's and my friend and I loudly talked after class about how we were going to have pizza for lunch that day, to the disapproval of our classmates. While my peers were dating and getting in trouble, I decided I didn't want to do that, so didn't.

    • That's funny. I am in the ninth grade and I JUST started noticing guys. It drives them crazy. :)

    • whoaa ur in year 9? im in year 10

  • What are you talking about? A lot of teens are abstinent, whether by choice or lack of opportunity.

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