Why did my boyfriend do this to me last night?

[Anonymous]

OK.. Here's the story, I was sleeping and got up around 2:08am this morning and my boyfriend stared at me and I said what and he said nothing, I have noticed that he turned the computer down and turned it back on. and he came over to me and laid next to me and relaxed me and I fell a little back to sleep but not all the way. Then He sneaked back off the bed and went to the computer and when I looked up at him, he made a face like "omg" meaning he wanted me to sleep so I don't see what he's dong. So he put the internet window up and kept clicking the red X and then trying to click another window as quick as he could. So I was like what are you doing, "why you keep clicking, are you hiding something" He said no. So I got up after he stopped clicking and I told him I was looking at the history, So I clicked on the history and there was naked girls and p*rn pin all over the history. I was so upset and I got so mad at him for doing that.. I asked him why did you lie to me and he said because you would have got mad.. I cried last night I was so bad. I asked him if you wanted to look at a girl naked why couldn't you just asked me if I could get undresses for you? And he said I wanna look at other people to.. Verity.. Please someone help me with this answer.. I'm heart broken and I need answers.. Is this normal or dose he not love me?

[tt840537]

This is normal. Guys look at p*rn even when in relationships. Husbands have p*rn all the time. Boyfriend have p*rn all the time. I don't understand why a girl would get mad. It's not like he cheated on you.

He probably was hiding this from you because he might have been afraid that you might flip out on him for watching p*rn, in which he was correct because you did. Just because he watches p*rn doesn't mean he doesn't love you. Guys just need visual stimulation from time to time ( we been doing this since we were like 12-13 so we're not going to stop just because of a relationship). You can talk to him about it, tell him that he should open up to you in these types of things but there's very little chance that you're going to stop him from watching p*rn.

Which leads to my next question why do girls get mad at guys for watching p*rn?

[Asker]

Yes you are right he knows I will flip out. I know that's why he hides it from me. I just would hope he understands I love him and that it hurts my feelings that he would do such a thing. He always tells me when he's mad that I'm fat and everything and I don't like it and I that he thinks the girls in p*rn are hotter than me and it hurts my feelings that he would do that to me. And girls would like there man to look at them no one elts. if they do it makes think there ugly.

[Mak2512]

Porn addiction is just like any other addiction.(drug or anything). It usually has nothing to do with you and love. If he is addicted he is addicted to that regardless of he loves you or not. Instead of getting so p*ssed off. You need to help him and need to find ways how to help him to get rid from this addiction just like you may help him getting rid of any bad habit he might have If you love him.

The other reason might be that he is bored of some routine procedures. You need to add some spice to your sex life. Ask him if he got fetish or he want to do it in a more kinky way...lol.

You sleeping while he is still awake and can't get sleep might have something to do of he is not getting enough satisfaction from you and you might unknowingly ignoring him.

[Asker]

Yes I know what you mean. But he wants me to sleep. I don't sleep because I wanna, I let him use the computer so I sleep. I always ask him to f*** me and he always complains about it. I also have tried to get him off p*rn but he just wont. I have tried different things he could do other than going on p*rn and I can't think of anything that he would want to do. I'm just so scared that he might break up with me for the kind of girls he's looking at. I love him and don't wanna loose him. any suggesti

[Mak2512]

Dont worry. The kind of girls we usually see in p*rn are hard to find in real life ..LOL. Why don't you just tell him that you are not upset and you are also interested to see some of the p*rn together. I mean why not ! Eihter this way you guys will be able to spice up your life again or he would just give up on p*rn knowing that by watching the performnace of men in those p*rn clips you might break up with him for somone else. -;)

[Asker]

How are they hard to find? their just girls? Oh he don't mind if I broke up with him. He don't care. all he cares about his p*rn. I have watched in the past with him, but the next morning I asked him, I asked if they were hotter than me and he said yes they are and I was really upset and he said that's why he watches it. And then last night he asked if he could buy it and he wanted me to go with him to choose the p*rn he wanted and I was like OK what ever. So I don't know about him anymore

[ellesmira]

Duuude don't freak out, do you watch p*rn!? I do about every day, so does my husband, don't make him feel like he can't share that with you or he never will. And if he can't look at other girls he may start effing other girls, watch it with him seem interested. As for freaking out last night, tell him you were confused and tired and frighten by suddenly finding out about this. ALL guys watch p*rn weather you like it or not they are physical creatures and you cannot change that about them no matter what you say, or what they say to make you believe that. Don't look into this too much, or he will clam up about other things too.

I have walked in on my husband jerking to p*rn more times then I can remember, I just shut the door and come back in 20 minutes, or help him finish:)

what kind of girlfriend do you want to be?

[Asker]

I bet your really skinny and pretty and you don't care if he looks but I'm not quite skinny and pretty. and he says he thinks there hotter than me that's why he watches it. I wish I could be like wha you are right know but I just need help to make it be OK and make it so I don't look that bad. I just love him and I wish he would love me and not worry about other people but idk

[lucius46ad]

It is too bad that what he thinks even matters to you. He sounds absolutely charming. It is truly a tragedy that you want his love. My advice is get away from this loser as quick as you can.

[Asker]

I have tryed to leave him but he keeps running back to me and saying he wants me back but I told him he needs to change but he wont. So I can't run away because he can find me.

[Dragonlady]

you need to be stronger then that, a man only treats you the way you let him. Lay down the law girl I wouldn't allow that sort of thing and you tell him that, you can either show him how it feels or tell him to hit the road. If your set on him then try showing him how it feels to sit there watching you oggle other men, let him see you have options other then him, flirt away with who ever you can

[3v3lAngel]

if he's dump enough to do it when you're right there, ya id be done with that

[Asker]

i know but when he knew I was waking up he shut the computer right off and then he came over to me and layed next to me and relaxed me back to sleep. After I thought about it I knew he was up to somthing because he woundlt come over and do somthing like that. I asked him if he was hidding anything and he said no. and I went and looked at his computer and he kept saying nothing and I found dirty crap and I was so mad and told him how could you and he hit me sp hard in my head and it hurt so bad

[sikoo31]

lololololol you're funny.

i can't say its normal cause I don't believe in that word but, most people look at p*rn even when they love someone already. me and my girls look at it. other couples look at it too, a lot of them do it together.

you're just being insecure, if he loves you and is a good man, he won't go beyond looking.

[Asker]

Oh he won't cheat on me. I know he wont. But if I was little like really really skinny so I can actually go to the beach and not look fat then I wouldn't be so upset when he looks at other people. I love him and I just wished it didn't hurt me as much as it dose all the time.

[sikoo31]

like I said, that's just your insecurity.

[BlackSuperman]

why he ackn all stupid, I haven't a clue... but he dumb as hell for that... I don't know why he doing that... question is, why be with someone who causes you ANY kind of pain?

[Asker]

i don't know. I love him I just wish he would understand that I don't like it and that he can stop and understand and look at my feelings to and not just himself. If I was really skinny and looked smokin hott that he would look at all the time then I won't care who he looks at. and what he dose as long as he didn't cheat on me. I would be the perfect girl. But I wanna be small and I have tryed so hard but I don't know if I will ever be like that.

[eephous]

If you were my girlfriend, and started snooping around my computer... you wouldve left my place with no more boyfriend. I wouldve dumped your ass.

[abc--123]

sounds like he has an addiction, if he's doing it with you there asleep then he can't wait which is verry unusual. if he didn't want you to know then why do it with you in the room.

i would talk to him and see how oftern he does this and why.

[Asker]

I have and he told me that he hasn't in a while. He also was looking up naked women on google search and that's what upsets me more when he's doing that. It kills me and I don't know why. I don't it to bother me, I wanna be OK with it but for some reason I can't.. I love him and I hope he would care about me and love me no matter what. I just don't want him to leave me that's all.

[abc--123]

Atleast he is looking on the internet and not in real life, maybe you should have a chat with him about it and see if you can agree to occasionaly let him google it, this way he is prob less likely to actually cheat on you

[Asker]

He thinks cheating is low. Why would he cheat on me. Your saying if he don't Google he would. Why would that matter. If you love someone so much you don't cheat on them if you don't look at other women. That's affual,

[abc--123]

Im not saying he would but if he is sneaking around at 2am to google naked women and you then stop him, he may resent you or the temptation to cheat will get to high. its like when you are dieting they say don't cut out chocolate just have a little bit every now and again to cut down cravings, same goes for this situation maybe letting him google it every now and again will supress his cravings. just a thought.

[Asker]

I have thought about that before but I didn't know. I know he would do it all the time because he's like that. he was grown up being a pig. So I'm trying to tell him to stop. He is so much a pig he plays the game grant theft auto and he like to watch the p*rn cartoon. And that's disgusting. that's pushing it when you watch cartoon p*rn.

[Dragonlady]

oh hunny, this guy sounds like a complete creep! a douche lol dump him and him not leaving you alone is a form of control. That shouldn't be a reason to keep taking him back. Don't reply to his messages block his number and don't see him its as simple as that, you'll find with him out of the pic the pain will be gone, no more hurt ...of him telling you your not good enough, of him looking at other girls in front of you..(because that's straight up disrespectful)

[ilovegreentea]

its normal...hes just not right for you anymore and he's a stupid person who don't know what he's doing...

[Asker]

No he's not. but I can't break up with him becvause he won't leave me alone he keeps running back to me and telling me he loves me so idk

[Anonymous]

if he wants to look at other people , well he's not committed then is he, somone who really loves you would only want to look at you. idiot.

[Asker]

I know but he dont. He wants to look at a bunch of people because its a verity. I told him then date verity of women and leave me alone because I don't want anyone with me that would hurt my feelings like that. But whatever. I guess I have no choice to try to make him care about me but it will be tough because the way he is. I can't break up with him because he comes running back to me saying he loves me and he don't want me to leave so I don't know what to do anymore

[Opinion Owner]

and I ment he was an idiot* not you