Why do girls stop putting out in a long term relationship?

[Anonymous]

seriously girls you wonder why you man cheats on you... why do girls stop having sex in a log term relationship..

[kheserthorpe]

I will note that this doesn't always happen and also note that some -men- stop having sex. There can be a lot of reasons.

- it can be that the high sex drive partner stops tying to be romantic or engage in foreplay or whatever, but this is more a cause of reduced sex, not close to zero sex. When sex goes to near zero, the partner who wants sex is normally trying everything obvious to get the other in the mood.

- it can be that the low drive partner is in fact returning to their 'normal' stage. Maybe they tried harder to please their partner early on, or maybe the excitement of a new relationship temporarily boosted their sex drive up, but now it's returned to normal.

- sex drive differences in many cases become wider not narrower with time. The lower drive partner feels like the other 'just wants sex' which makes them want it less. The high drive partner is starved for it and going crazy, plus the rejection makes them want MORE sex to feel connected. The low drive partner often starts rejecting anything that might lead to sex being suspicious it's 'just to get sex' i.e. affection etc.

- some studies had suggested women's testosterone dips in long relationships.

- contrary to the suggestion women cut off sex because guys are Inattentive it actually seems more common that women lose all sad drive when guys turn into 'nice guys' who act like obedient children.

[Asker]

she says sex is for teenages{ she f***ed like 50 guys from 12-18) I guess she is all used up and I have to suffer with it...

[kheserthorpe]

Maybe. Or maybe sex was something she always faded for attention and never understood how to connect with positive emotions. How many kids do you have?

[Anonymous]

This is absolutely true in my experience... and women struggle hard to offer good sex in the initial stage of a relationship. After awhile, they just lose interest. It's as if they couldn't just care. Which is no wonder why men search for 'options' -- one of which usually is hefty alimony.

[samhradh_leannan]

When sex in a long term relationship dwindles, most often it isn't just one partner refusing to put out but both partners simply not finding the time or inspiration. Sure, sometimes it is one partner, but usually when this happens neither person is as invested in sex they used to be. It is natural for sex to taper off in long term relationships, because it takes a lot of active effort to keep it as interesting after years of being together.

This really isn't something you can pin on girls alone, though.

[Asker]

She keeps dwindling on an old boyfriend with a big penis... I'm average

[samhradh_leannan]

I don't know what that even means. "Dwindling on an old boyfriend"?

[mizzlalaland]

Because men stop foreplay: to us that's intimate conversation, touching without demanding or pressuring, and, continuing to treat her like a lady instead of 'expecting'. In short, you have to keep working for it. Don't be so lazy dude, your sex life is at stake!

[Asker]

not me...I LOVE fore play

[Anonymous]

some girls don't like sex I guess. don't know, I do.

[Asker]

whats you name... lol

[Racez]

They got bored. Or the man is usually taking the same position/s when having sex so there's no spice in it.

[38darlene]

I never stopped putting out was up for just about anything . The dog just had a wandering eye thought the grass was greener on the other side of the fence . I hope the little #itch cuts him off cause he was getting lazy in bed .

[Asker]

wow.

[Anonymous]

Not all women stop...only the selfish ones. The way they see it, they've lost their libido so why have sex? The answer to that question is "because you care about HIS satisfaction and want to keep him happy".

A woman in a long-term relationship who thinks it's OK to not have sex because she is not into it is most likely in for a broken relationship.

[samhradh_leannan]

I agree that it is important for both partners to take each others needs into account. But if one partner isn't into sex, the thing to do is try to work together to find a way to get them back into it. NOT to demand sex from someone who truly isn't interested. That's not going to end up being fun for either party anyhow.

[archer86]

BEST ANSWER!

[Opinion Owner]

"...NOT to demand sex from someone who truly isn't interested" He shouldn't have to 'demand' sex. Thank god my wife has never put me in that position. I will never cheat on her because she takes great care of me even when she isn't into it, and I do the same for her. It's called taking care of your partner To be frank, samhradh leannan, yours is the answer of an inexperienced and naive person.

[samhradh_leannan]

No, mine is the answer of someone who doesn't think it's right to have to have sex purely, entirely, 100% for someone else's sake. To me that's pretty much a form of rape. That's just how I feel about it. I believe that if you are unable to salvage your sex life in such a way that both people are enthusiastic and satisfied, then it should be abandoned. Not only do I think it is wrong for someone to feel obligated to have sex when they don't truly want to, but I also don't understand why either..

[samhradh_leannan]

.. party would even want that to happen. If I knew my partner was totally uninterested in sex and was doing it purely for my benefit I wouldn't enjoy it anyway. I feel that sex should be a mutual thing. That's just my opinion, it doesn't make me naive.

[Opinion Owner]

So let me understand this...if a woman is married to a good man, with kids, and she loses your sex drive (happens all the time!) your suggestion is divorce. Do I have that right?

[Anonymous]

Most of the time its because yall men get boring and the female isn't as happy with your sex then she was before.

[Asker]

I`m adventurious... she isnt

[Opinion Owner]

Was she before ?

[38darlene]

I was he got lazy

[Opinion Owner]

Ohhhh then Maybe he was always like that and was just trying to keep you happy now he is just comfortable