Why is sex more emotional for women and more physical for men?

[Anonymous]

Women react to sex much more emotionally and psychologically... while men seem to be more concerned with the physical act itself. But Why is this?

[MrOracle]

It's simple biology. Like every creature that's still alive on Earth, we've evolved to be excellent at reproducing, and our reproductive instincts are very finely tuned to ensure that we pass on the best possible genes.

Let's look at the gender differences when it comes to reproduction. Women can generally have one baby a year or so, setting aside twins and such. And women carry that child, give birth to it, and then feed it and raise it through its early years. Thus, they've been programmed to be VERY selective about their mates, because they're trying to find the best father for their child THIS YEAR, at the very least. And they bond with that person emotionally when they have sex, which is in the best interest of the child, because that will help motivate her to keep the father around to take care of the child.

Men are very different. A man could impregnate a different woman every hour (obviously that isn't indefinitely sustainable, but you get the idea). And biologically, it's in his best interest to impregnate as many women as possible, from as many gene pools as possible, to ensure that as many of his children as possible survive to pass on his genes. So, a man is programmed to look for the best women for THIS HOUR, and he's programmed to desire VARIATION in women, which assures a varied gene pool that creates resistances to disease and recessive genetic traits. Biologically, it doesn't make sense for him to "get attached" to one woman for sex/reproduction, which is why men evolved to be able to separate sex from love/emotional connections, and women didn't.

Men who, for whatever reason, didn't follow this behavior had fewer viable children, and their lines died off, whereas men who reproduced widely had lots of children to keep their bloodlines and genes going, further reinfocing this behavior. It's Natural Selection at work.

The reason all this is so confusing is because, starting in the 1960s and accelerating through today, there have been HUGE changes in society due to technology. The BC pill is an obvious one, but there are many others. Instead of girls getting married at 15/16 as they always did, they are now getting married at 30. But biologically, they are still expecting sex and having babies in their late teens, and likewise so are men. 50 years may seen like a long time to a 19-year-old today, but it's a micro-second of time in evolutionary terms, when it takes thousands of generations to make even small changes to biological instincts.

[vptwarrior]

i find it odd that guy's are biologically designed to cheat, that's odd but interesting.

[MrOracle]

It's not so much that they're designed to cheat, as they are designed not to commit to a monogamous relationship. Essentially, a strong emotional attachment (i.e., falling in love) is what overrides a man's normal desire to just have sex with as many girls as possible. Which is why if a man falls in love, he knows it from the beginning. Sex won't make a man fall in love, and if he's not in love from the beginning, he never will be with that girl.

[kholland65]

Hormones to put it simply. However I think it has something to do with our instincts. In a primitive sense. Men are not supposed to get attached. We plant our seed and move on to the next target. We are supposed to impregnate as many women as possible with our seed. Women on the other hand don't have this luxury. Once you get pregnant, you must sit on the sidelines for 9months.

Men do get emotional and can get attached, its just not as common. Men in general just aren't as emotional as women. Chemicals are released throughout the body during sex that cause attachment and this is for a very logical reason. Because biology knows that children are better raised by two committed parents. Our bodies tell us to stick together with our mate after having sex because its better for the baby, aka evolution.

[vmw2008]

I don't think this is entirely true. I know many women who enjoy the physical aspects of sex and don't let emotions get in the way of it. I also think men are just better at separating the kinds of sex they have based on the girl they're with. With one girl it may be all about the physical, but with another whom they really love and care about, it's very emotional.

[kholland65]

I think the second part of your post is very true and I've never even really thought about that. Women don't seem to discriminate when they have sex with someone. It's either they are attracted to you and want to have sex with you or they don't. Guys will have sex with many different girls, but we put them into categories, like is she just a hook up, or is this a girl I actually like and want to date. Most women just sleep with guys they would also want to date.

[crookthings]

I second this. Gender doesn't strictly dictate someone's feelings about sex.

[justincider]

Agreed. Even if more physical for us its still emotional, and visa versa. Plenty of women out there who hook up or chose a partner based on status or what they can get from the relationship. Not many gold diggers get attached, its just a paycheck. Of course that's not all women, just an example of where they don't get atached...

[bassman]

Just the way God wired us to be.

[vptwarrior]

...or how we evolved to be, were not machines.

[bassman]

Ha ha! Didn't mean wired literally. Sorry brother... but the thought of evolution is old and out dated arguement that can no longer stand on its own two feet.

[kheserthorpe]

I don't think its that simple.

I think its true that men can, on average, more easily have emotion-free sex.

However when men have good enthusiastic sex with someone they love, it has a strong emotional impact on them.

[ObscuredBeyond]

The thought of it is very emotional to me. I want to make love to my women, not simply get off to them. The latter feels too cheap.

[Konnour]

It varies from person to person.

Do you think female p0rn-stars experience any kind of emotional attachment during it?

[Dragan]

Making love is very emotional for me. It is both emotional and physical pleasure.

[moviedude714]

girls by nature are more emotional

[MIlkChocolate]

A guys private parts has a mind of its own

[scnbabe89]

Yes woman think with there heads and guys think with there d***s!

[jacquesvol]

All women? :-O All guys? :|

[Anonymous]

human nature

[Anonymous]

men are more logic based and women are more emotion based. logically, its a physical act - simply rubbing organs together. women are just super emotional for some reason...cant really explain that one sorry haha.