18+ ADULTS ONLY: Which answer-option most closely matches how you feel about your Significant Other having sexual fantasies about other people?

Picture from article below
Picture from article below

Reference article: https://www.brides.com/fantasize-about-someone-not-married-to-2303821

Note 1: Assume for this question that you have a Significant Other (SO: a spouse, fiancé/fiancée, boyfriend/girlfriend, or other romantic partner).

Note 2: This question was inspired by the following question…

Have you ever had any sexual contact/activity with someone else in a hot tub?

…and was specifically inspired by my conversation with the 18-24 Pink Anon on that question whose opinion begins with: “We did it many times at our apartment building. If you go to the Jacuzzi later at night, no one was in it…”

Note 3: With the above in mind, “Which answer-option most closely matches how you feel about your Significant Other having sexual fantasies about other people?”

A - “It’s NOT ok if my SO has sexual fantasies about others — AND my SO better not tell me about having those fantasies”
Vote A
B - “It IS OK if my SO has sexual fantasies about others — I just DON’T want to KNOW for sure about it from my SO”
Vote B
C - “I’d like to know if my SO has sexual fantasies about others — BUT I would NOT want to discuss details”
Vote C
D - “I’d like to know if my SO has sexual fantasies about others — BUT I’d NEVER entertain the idea of turning those fantasies into reality”
Vote D
E - “I’d like to know if my SO has sexual fantasies about others — AND I MIGHT entertain the idea of turning those fantasies into reality”
Vote E
F - “I’d like to know if my SO has sexual fantasies about others — AND I PROBABLY WOULD entertain the idea of turning those into reality”
Vote F
G - “I’d like to know if my SO has sexual fantasies about others — AND I DEFINITELY WOULD entertain the idea of turning those into reality”
Vote G
Select gender and age to cast your vote:
Girl Guy
Updates:
1 y
UPDATE 1: Answer-options F & G end with the words: “… entertain the idea of turning those into reality”
1 y
UPDATE 2: For those who provide/have provided an opinion, please also cast a vote in this question’s poll
3 1

Most Helpful Girls

  • I chose B. But to break it down, having sexual fantasies wouldn’t be too different from him watching porn. I didn’t like the way one of my exes admired the girls in porn. (This was before he saw me naked and before we were sexual BUT it actually led me to do some seductive things to put the focus back on me.) Anyways, from there on out I told him we couldn’t watch porn together. Besides, he was into girl on girl shit and I wasn't tryna see that. Now since he was so into the vid, I’m pretty sure he fantasized about doing them. Idc as long as he wasn’t dumb enough to state it aloud to me. Now lets talk about when he did state something aloud and it was regarding someone we knew in person. That bothered tf out of me and I could never fully trust him or them again. And it wasn’t even something x-rated but it was enough to make me paranoid and get me to thinking “what if”. So in summary, idc if they fantasize as long as they don’t tell me about it and as long as they know that it will NEVER happen while they’re dating me

    • Thanks for your through explanation. How did that one ex “admire the girls in porn” in a way that you didn’t like?

    • * thorough

    • Well it was our first time watching porn together and he literally looked like that dog toon where the eyes are huge and the tongue hangs out drooling. Its like he forgot i was there. Then i said FCK YA LOOKIN SO HARD FOR 🤣 After that i could tell he was scared to look at them. I love my porn. Its rare that sex fulfills me enough to not have to watch porn after. So i was not gonna rob the poor boy of his porn. I just prefer we watch it separately. He doesn't need to hear me say to the screen “Fuck me harder” when i feel like im cumming 😂🤣

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  • E.

    It's the only one that makes sense to me. Not knowing isn't going to change what he thinks about. I get that ignorance is bliss, but it doesn't change the reality of the situation. I'd rather know and maybe our fantasies might be in alignment.

    • I really like your thinking on this—it’s very practical: You’re open to the idea of “turning fantasies into realities” (based on what those fantasies are & what you’re ok with). And “knowing” (and “preferring knowing”) what your SO likes promotes open communication w them and opens the door to seeing if a compromise can be made to indulge/accommodate the other’s turnons (AND also helps you better understand if you & your SO are truly well-suited to be a couple or not).

    • 100%
      Wouldn't it be a shame if you were married for 20 years, and then found out that you both had some of the same fantasies? What a waste of time. This song spells it out very well.
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zROIlspgOjM

      Communication is key.

    • Wow!…what an awesome display of being able to identify a perfect example to reflect what you had just said!

      “Escape [The Piña Colada Song] is about a man wishing to escape with another woman because he feels tired of the relationship he’s in”…

      https://genius.com/3807793

      And he sets up a rendezvous with the letter-writing woman, and in the 3rd verse of the song it says…

      “So I waited with high hopes
      And she walked in the place
      I knew her smile in an instant
      I knew the curve of her face
      It was my own lovely lady
      And she said, "Aw, it's you"
      Then we laughed for a moment
      And I said, "I never knew..."

      genius.com/Rupert-holmes-escape-the-pina-colada-song-lyrics

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What Girls & Guys Said

5 3
  • I choose D I would want to know if he is thinking about fucking others... but no I would entertain his skank ass fantasies.. but at least if he cheated I wouldn't be surprised and more likely to catch him..

    • I am curious about the following (and I’m not trying to be judgmental at all by asking this)… Do you think there’s a way that people who think the same (answer-option D) way that you do should bring up their feelings about this as soon as it is practically possible so as to avoid being with/ultimately ending up with someone who “secretly harbors” turnons/fantasies which are very different & far-removed from their own turnons/fantasies?

    • Yeah probably I would assume it would come up while dating... and most likely we would not end up staying with someone who has such different views on sex and fantasies... but if they never told you and they just keep these things secret.. I would want to eventually know..

    • Uh huh. Eventually one person in the relationship has to initiate the asking/telling of turnons.

  • I turned some of his fantasies into reality for him.

    They turned out to be welcomed realities for me too!

    • I'm also well aware he has a crush of super model Alessandra Ambrósio and actress Jessica Alba. I've seen him "drool" whenever he sees them on TV or the big screen. I'll give him a "free pass" if he'll give me a "free pass" to have sex with his doppelganger, Henry Cavill. If I could find a way to get all five of us uninhibited altogether, I'll do it for both of us.

    • So I guess you voted G in this question’s poll, right? Also: My view is that it’s SO nice when a person indulges their SO in their SO’s sexual interests; whenever those interests are legal & consensual, no one is getting hurt, the SO is NOT “out of control” (and NOT clearly needing help) because of their sexual interests, and those interests are not considered to be “gross” by the other person in the relationship.

  • I selected G. Make her happy.

    • “Happy wife, happy life”? 😉

  • If she has fantasies and they sound good to me, I'm open to it. Pleasuring my SO is a main goal of mine, and if it also pleasures me, let's think about doing it.

    • Which answer-option letter did you select in this question’s poll?

    • I chose E

    • 👌👍

  • I only fantasize about having a SO. LOL

    • Which answer-option letter did you select in this question’s poll?

    • I don't have a SO. If I did it would be the second one. If he has them I would rather not know.

    • Ok. I guess you didn’t see “Note 1” on this question. Please cast your vote in the poll if you haven’t done so yet.

  • G seems to fit…

    • You have a VERY extreme/uninhibited personality, right?

    • Mmhmm…very sensual

    • Very hot.

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  • I'd feel offended if she were to tell me. It's one thing to have fantasies but there's another to tell me and a worse thing to ask to indulge. If she does the third one, I'd break up.

    • So you voted B in this question’s poll?

    • Even though I feel the wording is slightly off, yes.

    • 👌👍

  • I'd like to know, and we could talk about it.

    • Which answer-option letter did you select in the poll?…D, E, F, or G?

    • G...

    • Yeah? Nice. Have you ever openly discussed with an SO you & your SO being w someone else (separately or in a threesome) outside of your relationship?

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