A Critique of Every Sex Toy I’ve Used

Hi everyone! I hope this helps you decide what you might want, or not want, to try next! Please let me know your thoughts and what you’ve tried for yourself!

1. Rose

A Critique of Every Sex Toy I’ve Used

Cost: For me $9 (currently unavailable on Amazon)

The rose toy I bought has an ergonomic design with two ends. The rose-shaped part is meant to stimulate the clitoris. Other kinds I have seen have the “suction” design as in the satisfyer (I’ll cover that later), but mine has a 3-pronged set of silicone that rotate. The other end that’s shaped like a bud can be used either internally or in lieu of the rose on the clitoris. There are multiple settings that change both the intensity and frequency of vibration.

Honestly, I found the 3-pronged rose side “massage” underwhelming. It just doesn’t quite hit the spot for me. On the contrary, I really like to use the “bud” side on my clit and forget about inserting anything in me. Fortunately, you can use both at the same time or just dealers choice. The bud is basically a tiny handheld vibrator and it does what it needs to do. For the price I don’t regret buying it, but wish that the three prongs were more like the satisfyer instead.

2. The satisfyer pro

A Critique of Every Sex Toy I’ve Used

Cost: $46 for me, currently $40

Before purchasing, I always read up on what people have thought of their products. For this one, there was a general consensus that there is something of a learning curve, but when “it” happens, people lost their minds. After seeing this and a video where everyone obsessed over it, I couldn’t wait to be home alone!

The “learning curve” aspect is that this has an unusual effect. Where most people think of vibrating, this toy has a pulsing of air almost like air going out of a tire or something, but in a very specific place at the top. This is overall well-designed and you can hit it right where it needs to be, not requiring any more adjustment afterwards. Now I agree with the reviews. The orgasms I get from this tend to be within minutes and are as intense as they are sudden. It might not work for everyone. I know I tend to use the highest settings or it doesn’t do anything for me. But I highly recommend trying, because if/when it works for you or partner, believe me, it does.

3. Rabbit toy

A Critique of Every Sex Toy I’ve Used

Cost: $30

This toy is designed so that one prong is inserted vaginally and the top piece lands directly on the clitoris area. The material is very soft but firm on each. I was a little skeptical at how well it lands on each spot. For me, at least, I can say it was an exact match for both places.

Even without using the vibrator and manually moving it around a bit, I can see how pleasurable this will be. The design is so well thought out that g-spot skeptics may change their minds (and toys). Once the vibration is on giving stimulation to that precious pea, combined with the penetration that’s perfectly hitting the enigmatic g-spot, you won’t have any regrets on thinking of buying this. You won’t be thinking, period.

4. Generic vibrator

A Critique of Every Sex Toy I’ve Used

I bought this at a sex shop a while ago, so I don’t have the exact product. But i will say it is a generic vibrator, and the first real kind i used (I’ll share my unorthodox first “sex toy” later). Like most vibrators, mine has settings with different intensities and while it is the right shape for penetration, i will never get off on penetration alone so I’ve only used it up top.

I have had my fun with this one but it pales in comparison to most of the others. It’s just a vibrator with no unique approach or real multi-use. I mainly just did it when I felt bored with going about the old-fashioned way (🤞). I have not used it in quite a while now.

5. Butt plugs

A Critique of Every Sex Toy I’ve Used

Cost: $17

The pack I have came with three different sizes and a bonus bottle of lube that I would still have plenty of if it didn’t have a run-in with a dog’s teeth. At first glance, the anal virgin will find the bigger (or maybe even smaller) size intimidating considering where it’s going, but with some patience, it will be fine, trust me. In fact, if you have any questions about anal stuff in general i would be happy to answer. I was an anal “virgin” before getting this lack and it helped me gain confidence and familiarity with a unique thing. I would recommend using the smallest size with plenty of lube for just minutes at a time gradually working your way up, and this is the perfect kit for just that.

I am still amazed by how much anal stimulation and as an idea tickles my fancy. I have actually been able to orgasm by having in a butt plug and then stimulating my clit. And very intense orgasms at that!

I appreciate that it’s not for everyone, but if you are ever willing to give it a try I highly recommend it!

Furry butt plug

A Critique of Every Sex Toy I’ve Used

Cost: $30 at Spencer’s

This was used at the request of my partner and The one I got from Spencer’s is very easy and mostly comfortable to get and stay in. There is a “kink” element with the tail that you may or may not like. I think it’s honestly comfortable enough for the anal virgin to use (beginning only minutes at a time and with as much lube as you need). It’s still new to me but I’m not sure if there’s much more to say. For the price, I think you can do better unless someone’s really invested in the tail component.

The desperate teenager special

A Critique of Every Sex Toy I’ve Used

We have probably all been there. My drug of choice was the flat part of the head of a battery-powered toothbrush. Now that I’ve actually used so many real toys, the desperate teenager special is lackluster as hell. But it does make many people cum with its small but mighty little vibrations.

Vibrating cock ring

A Critique of Every Sex Toy I’ve Used

Cost for me $18. Currently $16

My experience is likely alternative, because due to Mr’s size we could not use it in the traditional sense. Determined as I am not to admit that I’ve wasted twenty bucks, I have used it as a personal massager. Despite its small size, there’s something to be said about the vibrating power. It probably is just as good as my generic vibrator. So I recommend this as a possibly cheaper alternative to a traditional or “small” vibrator.

I still have more to try including the famous hitachi wand, nipple clamps, and straight-up dildos. But I would still say I’m seasoned-enough to give credible opinions on these products I have tried! Thank you so so much for taking the time to peruse my MyTake. Have you tried, or want to try, any of these adult toys?

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Most Helpful Guys

  • My SO loves her rabbit. Her favorite thing to do is to stimulate herself with the rabbit while sucking me, then having me jerk off onto her tits. She has some really intense orgasms.

  • I bought my wife the “plus one” and now she is enjoying many wonderful orgasms…. Me, I’m looking for a new sex partner.

    • 🤣😅

Most Helpful Girls

  • So you prefer plastic over a human being?

    • she never said tht. why not incorporate both.

  • Haha the toothbrush 🤣

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What Girls & Guys Said

1 10
  • My wife is ashamed for anyone to know about the toy that gives her the most intense orgasms.

  • I bought my girl, before becoming my wife, the satisfyer Pro. She squirted a lot and literally wet the hotel room. She stopped using it a while ago saying although it's great for squirting, it's not stimulating her enough to feel mind blowing orgasms.

  • Well written. Very informative.

  • satisfyer pro seems best

  • You bought the whole store no lie

    • Curiosity killed the cat 😹

    • You are not lying, that cat is holding on for dear life 😂

    • It’s actually very happy hahaha

    • Show All
  • Lucky you😎

  • My ex used to get off on her tooth brush when she was a teen 🤣

  • ngl surprised me with the toothbrush lol

  • This got me very hard

  • This is a great article about sex toys! Thank you for letting me know about some sex toys. When my husband is on a business trip, I like to use wildolo vibrators. Then we would make a dirty phone call and let him use the vibrator app to remotely control. It's really exciting and exciting. We are so enjoy this feeling

  • My favorite to use on my wife is a bullet vibrator. Have you ever tried a Sybian?