"A woman who can't properly teach her partner how to satisfy her in bed shouldn't have sex... "Am I wrong?

A woman who cant properly teach her partner how to satisfy her in bed shouldnt have sex... Am I wrong?
This question as a result of this question:
A man who cannot satisfy a woman in bed deserves to be cheated on. am I wrong?
If it takes two to have sex, why is the blame only put on one person?
That's where you communicate, try to fix/ resolve the issue...
A woman who cant properly teach her partner how to satisfy her in bed shouldnt have sex... Am I wrong?
Instead of saying nothing or doing nothing to address it..(and then use that as an excuse/justification to cheat 🤦🏼‍♀️🙄)
A woman who cant properly teach her partner how to satisfy her in bed shouldnt have sex... Am I wrong?
Updates:
+1 y
For those that didn't get it, this question was "meant" to be wrong.. Just as wrong as that other post where the user was blaming the male for bad sex and a justification to excuse cheating... Just because I'm female, don't mean I don't get as sick and tired of seeing women blame men for everything as I do when men blame women for everything... It won't ever stop until BOTH genders just quit the BS...
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Superb Opinion

  • Hi Brains: I want to take a crack at answering both questions. Without going into the 'sexually titillating" stuff, my experience is, it seems a little 'lazy' on both parties' parts.
    Every guy thinks he is a GREAT lover and knows what it takes to keep his Wife/lover/mistress happy with their sex life.

    I used to be one of those guys, but honestly feel that of the many women I have had sex with, only ONE did I have the kind of relationship with seemed to be satisfactory to both of us. ONLY ONE, and that leaves a bunch of girls/women feeling that I was a real "jerk" in bed.

    WHY? 1) Because neither of us took the time to tell, demonstrate, what the other wanted/needed to make us feel satisfied and happy with the relationship. Looking back, that was sad. 2) The relationships were so short lived, (Most were) that neither of us (at least I didn't) think about any long-term planning and further deepening our understanding of each other, because, at the time, all I was interested in was getting in them. (gross, I know)

    Now, for the giant killer: I have a relative, unnamed, that I know much about. She was a 'virgin', she said, and so too was her hubby, and he didn't know jack S&^%$ about sex, pussy, et cetera, and apparently did not want to learn, and was therefore, shit in bed, and not interested in learning anything. He was a very 'technical' guy.
    They had everything else, in the marriage, but she wanted more and had sex with others for many years until he found out. (I never knew how that was "ironed out"
    SHE was a counselor, and think she should have had the training to deal with her ineffective husband in bed?

    My marriage did not work out, as I 'lost interest' in sex with my wife because it seemed to me, that sex to her, was a 'numbers game", how much you got rather than how satisfied she was. The marriage lasted about two years, after FOUR YEARS of 'courtship" (old-school term) I'm sure, my wife faked orgasms, as after my LONG TERM relationship at 20 something, I knew the difference.
    No answers here from me. just examples
    Bruce

    • Oh I agree communication needs to work both ways...

Most Helpful Guy

  • I don't know about "shouldn't have sex", but she doesn't deserve good sex. She has no right to complain.

    So what's the problem? Doesn't she feel comfortable talking about sex? Does she think it's improper to "talk dirty"? Talking will not only get you what you want, it also adds to the eroticism. And it's not like you have to write an instruction manual. It's often just a matter of saying stuff like "Oh, yes! Right there! Just like that! Don't stop!" or "Slower" or "Faster". But being more descriptive can be really hot, too. Get used to using words like clit, pussy, cock, fuck. Be creative. Compliment each other. Tell each other what you want and need. Be voracious and passionate. That would drive almost any partner wild.

    Maybe she's afraid of saying anything for fear of implying that her partner doesn't know what he's doing.

    On the other hand, maybe he HAS gotten offended before and gotten his ego bruised at the suggestion that he isn't a sexual master. Men have fragile egos, especially when it comes to sex.

    Maybe he only cares about his own needs and assumes that SHE'S the one with a problem. Maybe he thinks a woman's role is to be used and doesn't care about her pleasure at all.

    Maybe he's the one who is a sexual prude, is turned off by "dirty" talk; thinks sex, itself, is dirty; thinks sex is only for procreation; or thinks sexually passionate women are sluts. Who knows. I'm sure there are some guys out there with serious hang ups. Although I don't know how such guys would wind up with partners.

    Also, everyone is different. They may like or not like different things. So, for example, if the guy had a previous partner who loved his style, his current partner might have different needs. Maybe he has no idea what his current partner wants and would love to know.

    Communication a key to every healthy, happy relationship. That's especially true for blissful sex.

    • Agree 💯

Most Helpful Girls

  • I don’t think it’s a case of either/or. There are some women who are just not comfortable with telling their partners what feels good and what doesn’t! I don’t think they “should not have sex” but I DO believe that sex is SO much better when BOTH parties communicate with the other, as to what they like, and do not like! No guy WANTS to have sex with a woman who just lies there silently… They still will, but they would prefer an active partner! There is nothing wrong with telling anyone “up a bit, to the left, a bit more, yes right there!

    • 👍👍

    • Thanks hun 😘💋

  • Yes you are wrong. Some women just don't know what will satisfy them so they can't teach it either. The pointnof sex in a relationship is discovering each other, self discovery and open communication. That will foster growth amd sex will keep getting better and better over time

    • That was my point.. This question was more sarcastic in response to other post... You can't blame just the other person if you're dissatisfied sexually and you yourself do nothing to try to make it better yet use that to justify cheating as the other post implied.. Sex takes two

    • True true true. Agreed 100%

    • Sex definitely takes both of you practice makes perfect also change it up.

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What Girls & Guys Said

16 45
  • i mean she can have sex, but i agree that bad sex doesn't have to be guys fault

    • Right!!

  • Well, my first thought is "What if she's not sure herself?", but I agree with your core assertion; sex isn't something a man does TO a woman, but WITH her. I'm more of the "if all you do is lay there, what makes you think you *deserve* an orgasm?" school, but yes, the key is proper communication, and willingness to address and fix problems rather than just run from them.

    • Thank you!! And thank you for getting it!

  • I would agree with you, that is why it is always best to determine if there is any sexual vibe between the two of you and how well you actually vibe with each other. I have been with women that I thought were amazing, but they ended up being kind of lame in bed. I chalked it up to the fact that we probably did not vibe with each other sexually. Not a matter of her not being good or me being good we just were not good together. She looked amazing and was sexy but the vibe between the sheets was not there.

    To some degree I do not think you can teach someone how to be good with you, they either just are or they are not. So no, I would not stay with someone I felt I needed to teach... because lets be honest that can be insulting to a person. If they feel they needed to teach me, then the implication is that I am not good and of course I do not believe that about myself. Usually when I am not good, it is because she was not good and that really means we were not good together.

  • Interesting take, but wrong. Nobody should (unwillingly) not have sex.

    Communication of course is vital. But it is easier said than done. In most of my relationships (now that I think of it, in *all* of my relationships) I was the non-communicator. When I was between relationships everything was crystal clear to me, I knew all I had to do was communicate, be honest, and find an equally communicative and honest partner. Everything would be perfect!

    But the minute I entered any relationship my mind turned to mush and my senses of logic and reason were placed through a paper shredder. I could barely vocalize what I truly wanted, and was petrified of asking her what she likes.

    These seemingly paralyzing mental shackles had their reasons for existing (they stemmed directly from my childhood [I will spare you the details!]). I have worked to rid myself of these traits. But at age 61 I still struggle with these mental failings.

    Should I not have sex because of these failings? I think not (though others may disagree).

    So, putting myself in the shoes of the woman in your question, I have to say she should not not have sex.

    • The title was more sarcasm... In response to the other post saying a man deserves to be cheated on if he can't pleasure his woman in bed... It takes two for real pleasure

    • I picked up on your sarcasm, and was going to answer in the same vein. But as soon as I started typing I found myself sharing my own experience. ;-)

    • It's all good👍 and been there myself when younger...

  • You should tell and show your guy what you like. He doesn't know, because he doesn't have one.

    • Exactly!! Too many women blame the guy if sex isn't good, but sometimes you have to tell them, show them what you like

  • You're wrong, some guys won't listen or think they know better because they watch porn. You can't educate stupid but you can hold him down until you're finished.

    • 🤣🤣🤣

  • You're wrong. Some men just can't be taught lol

    Also if you want to have sex without being satisfied, that's completely in your right.

    • Ummm this was a sarcastic question to the other post about if a man can't satisfy a woman in bed, he deserves to get cheated on🤦🏼‍♀️🙄... Maybe next time read the whole post... If a man can't be taught to pleasure you, then break up with him, not user that as bullshit justification to cheat... And I've had no problem being satisfied because I know how to communicate

  • I somewhat kind of agree, but this doesn't seem to take virgins (of both sexes) into account. And the whole "blame only put on one person" thing comes from the fact that men are easy to get off in the bedroom and women are the ones always complaining that a guy can't please her right, is too small downstairs, rushes too much, is too selfish, etc. I took the quote more as being a woman should teach a man how to please her and communicate with him, as opposed to a man expecting to automatically be good at sex with no communication from her at all, like some women demand and expect.

    • That's my point! Don't not communicate, not work on making it better, blame him alone for bad sex and then cheat and use that to justify it 🤦🏼‍♀️🙄

  • How bout both parties teach each other. Why is it just on the woman to be the teacher?

    • This question was a sarcastic response to the other post... Why always blame just the man of the sex isn't good? Or use that as bullshit excuse to justify cheating as the other poster was stating? Obviously it takes two to tango, so both should work to improve the sex.. And a woman knows what satisfies her, communicate that to your partner instead of laying there unsatisfied. Guys aren't mind readers anymore than women are,🤷🏼‍♀️

    • Mhm.

  • People have no idea how to talk to each other anymore.

    • So true

    • True, and they become discouraged and give up. Nothing worse than, " I don't want to hear it! " I don't blame men or women for masturbating at all.

    • @BLP11520 So true.

  • There’s no excuse for cheating

    • Exactly!!

  • I would disagree though I agree that it always takes two. How shall she find a partner that satifies her? Like women are different for sure but that doesn´t mean that guys would need to completely learn satisfying a woman again the moment they change their partner.
    Yes she shouldn´t get in bed with every possible guy and maybe has to do evaluate her partners closer in terms of rather choosing experienced guys but that doesn´t mean that sex is completely off the table for her.

    • Different things get different people off... Just pleasuring one man/woman means you know how to pleasure any of every... That's where you learn your partner's sexual likes and dislikes and have them learn yours...

  • No, womens pleasure in regards to sex is a new found topic. It’s unspoken of simply because men nor women understand where our pleasure points are. It simply hasn’t been studied. People have went so long believing women aren’t supposed to have pleasure I wouldn’t be surprised most women don’t achieve the big O.

  • in short...

    these "blanket" statements that reduce something so complex as well as complicated to absolutism, are going to be quite often, very wrong

    the very moment we start a sentence with "a woman" "a man" it is already wrong, whatever else is said next, lol

    • You did get the question title was more sarcasm in response to that post... Point being it takes two to make sex satisfying and good

    • that is definitely and absolutely 1000% true love, relationships, sex... should be a matter of two people into it, to be better

    • Exactly!!

  • If she doesn't even know how to get herself off and tell me what her buttons are, then what am I even doing with her? I'm not a damn code breaker 🤣

    • 🤣🤣🤣 right!!

  • It takes two to have a satisfying sex life. How the hell can it be fulfilling if we don't know how to please one another?

    I saw that question the other day and knew she was more than likely trolling or not serious for discussion, but I wanted to call her out on the bullshit she said.

    Men are the main one's responsible for their own sexual pleasure AND their woman's? Get out of here. So we do all the work while your lazy ass is limp like a fucking dead fish?

    • I agree lolol And I also called it out... This question was in my reply to that post, and then I made it an actual question lolol I also wondered if was a troll question

  • Well, it’s a partnership, which means you both need to communicate with each other your desires and feedback

    • Exactly!! If the sex is bad, can't always blame just one person or the guy if did nothing to communicate or first try to make it better, instead of using that as excuse to justify cheating the way that user was with that post

    • Yeah, that would be totally pathetic

    • Right!!!

  • I saw that question, the other one. I disagree with this one as well! If you suck at explaining, that's on you. You don't know what you like? If he doesn' t want to listen that's on him.

    • But then aren't you kinda agreeing to what this post is saying? To explain your likes and dislikes, turn ons, turn offs? Instead of just laying there expecting the guy to know exactly what you want and then when it's not good, blame him

    • I disagree with the question itself. It feels the same as the other one. Aye, we have got to COMMUNICATE TO EACHOTHER how is he supposed to know! Should you have sex? YES, practise! Learn and explore eachother's bodies!

    • The question title was more sarcasm at the other question.. the whole point is you can't always just blame one person for bad sex

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  • Just wandering around, here. Short answer: NO!
    *There are some women who are apparently unable to have an orgasm either from their partner or solo. But many, I am told, enjoy the ride none the less. But apart from them, most (in my view) women are capable of self-pleasure. This is probably because their bodies are interactive and provide immediate feedback; enabling them to tune in on what works for them.
    *Speculating that many women are reluctant to talk about their sexual responses out of modesty or concern they will look bad by "knowing too much". These may be women who are unable to teach a guy because they can't or don't want to verbalize it. Soooo...
    If I were with a woman like that, one way to break through would be to ask her to demonstrate what works for her, be it by hand or with "technology". Then it would be incumbent upon me simulate what she does for herself. Once I understand what works, I could apply it but also experiment and develop it further.
    TMI ahead.
    *My understanding is that fewer than 25% of women experience an orgasm from intercourse alone. I have a particular liking for the Cowgirl position (posting is not necessary). None the less, I was unable to give her an orgasm no matter how I tried.
    But then, I applied what I had learned from watching her play and recalled that stimulation to her clitoris was the key to her getting off. So I gripped her hips with both hands and nestled her clitoris between the tips of my thumbs and massaged it. BINGO!
    So like anything else you do, much of it has to be self-taught Practice really does make perfect.

    • Okay but that's the point, she showed you, demonstrated for you, right? And that helped you better pleasure her, right? That's the point trying to make...

    • She CAN properly teach you. You just have to ask the right questions, not just sitting there with your arms crossed, judging her.

    • Where did I say to do that? Lolol

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  • This is something they need to discuss together or possibly see a Sex Therapist to help the both of them and there is no shame in getting Sex Therapy or maybe I am wrong If I'm not satisfying a Woman in bed, I want to know what's bothering her or upsetting her I want to give her the best sex

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