Advise after dark?

So my boyfriend has always tried to get me to do anal and im terrified to try it. Well just awhile ago while having sex he was begging to let him try it on me just one time. Was able to tolerate a finger but when it came to his dick I couldn't. One the pain kept scaring me and two just kinda hurt so we stopped. I want to try again in the future but im scared... for people that taken it in the back door. I need some tips.. help lol
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Superb Opinion
  • You need to take a week to a month to prepare. It's not a quick thing. You need lots of lube, and when you think you've used enough, use more. But first, start with a finger and get used to that for several days. Then you can move on to 2 fingers and get comfortable there. I'd also recommend a butt plug or a vibrator, something that isn't going to get stuck but be a little bigger next. Get used to that and then you can try it with his penis. But if you are worried about relaxing because you are worried about the pain, I'd say do those things by yourself, so you can go at your own pace. Once you are comfortable with those things, bring him in. Not sure if you drink, but my wife says that a little alcohol helps relax her in these situations. He must go slow, and yes, it works better if you relax. When he is going to put it in, if you take a deep, relaxing, calming breath, it will allow you to take him in with very little pain as long as he goes slow. When you take your next deep breath, he can go in a little more, but getting him in you a little bit might be all you do the 1st time with him. If he really wants to get to full anal sex with you, he has to be willing to go slow through the process or else you will hate it and never want it. Also, when he pulls out, tell him to do it slowly. It will feel weird for you, almost like you are going to the bathroom, but it's better than him pulling out quickly. Good luck!

Most Helpful Guy

  • Okay, try this.
    .

    have a nice long bath and get nice n clean or have shower and do the same.
    being clean is important.

    get some decent lube, there are some good ones out there.

    use it when putting fingers in etc.

    however I suggest on your own, lube up a toy (buy a small ish dildo if not got) and lube your ass, try it, just relax and don’t rush, wait for your ass to relax and take it slow.

    play with yourself as you slowly push in and out.

    now you have a tough idea what to expect.

    fast forward to boyfriend.

    similar with him, clean, plenty lube, have him lube his fingers when giving you oral and fingering ass.

    then when you feel ready, more lube on ass and his cock, then just like dildo, take it easy, he is not drilling for oil.

    do not let him push all way in just take it slow, let him cum inside you.

    insert into the above, get him used to having a lubed cock.

    so roughly the above

Most Helpful Girl

  • The more you tense up the more difficult it will be. Some tips like lube are obvious, others are more pm material.

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What Girls & Guys Said

1 8
  • I am a gay man and a total bottom who just loves getting fucked in the ass. If done right, anal sex does not really hurt at all, but can be a great source of pleasure for the person receiving it.

    The key to success is physical and mental preparation. The physical part requires a clean hole and a lot of lubrication where water-based lubricants often work the best. As for cleanliness, I would recommend making sure you have a complete bowel movement and a good shower before getting fucked. As you can guess, food that helps digestion will also work here to your benefit, like fibers, etc.

    The mental part is about relaxing your body and your asshole. Once your hole relaxes, it can stretch beyond your wildest imagination to help take your man's cock into you...

    A butt-plug may also help. This has been one of my biggest helpers to stretch my hole in order to be able to accommodate guys with really thick cocks. To that end, I'd recommend starting with a small enough plug that you can wear at the beginning. But, it should still be thick enough so you can feel the walls of your asshole stretching a little. After wearing that for a few days, you can gradually move to the next larger size, and then increase the size of the plug to really thick ones that you could not have accommodated at the beginning. This way, I've been able to enjoy really humongous cocks in my ass. I sure hope you will, as well!..

    Finally, the position of anal sex is also important, especially for the person taking it. That could depend on gender, but also personal anatomy. My favorite position getting fucked is the missionary position. Lying on my back with my man on top of me while raising my legs over his shoulders proved to be the most natural position for me where I always draw a lot of pleasure.

    Please feel free to write back if you have any more questions. Good luck!..

  • I had anal sex twice with two previous girlfriends at their request. We used tons of lube which is a must. However both girls did not like it and did not orgasm. Sure I had a good orgasm each time but the girls did not and they said it was uncomfortable. I prefer the front door any day!

  • First off, you have to be totally comfortable with this. Don't feel pressured because of your boyfriend. Its YOUR call and feel free to say no to yourself at any time.
    If you say yes, go to any reputable sexologist sites for advice. Note: Reputable, and NOT like "Teen Vogue" or "Cosmo for Her" crap.
    There is a YT channel "Sexplinations" who is fantastic on these things.
    Then talk it over with boyfriend, a LOT. Go over what's comfortable with both of you. Do more research. Talk some more. Then, that's up to you.

  • Dont do anal that my advice to you.

  • Guys shouldn’t be pressuring you to do that. Drop him, he has issuez

  • I've never been a back door lover. I won't stick my dick in a poop hole when there a perfectly good pussy right next to it. I HAVE, however, taken to using a prostate stimulator on myself. I wasn't sure I'd like it but it's interesting. From everything I've read, it takes time to get used to it. To blow a nut takes about 20 minutes but there are stimulators and vibrators you can get, through Adam and Eve. com that could help you prepare. You need butt lube. It's different than just any lube. It helps make the trip into you much easier.

  • first off relax ur self, its gonna hurt way more if ya don't 2nd lube plenty of it, 3rd have faith in ur boyfriend

    • I was trying to relax but anal just terrifies me. I was trying to even push myself back on it at my own pace and I just couldn't. It hurt and was scaring me.. ugh I failed 😞

    • till u stop getting so scared over it, its not gonna happen

  • Get a small vibrator and when he is fucking your pussy.. slowly put the vibrator in your ass. Make sure to lube it up first. The pleasure of having his dick in your wet pussy may take away the pain in your ass. Then after a few minutes take his dick and slowly put it in your ass

  • Use k gelly in your ass hole