Attraction of fisting... Honest non judgmental answer from a man and woman?

[Ewzill]

I've been with my boyfriend and father of my child about 4 years, just recently during sex has he brought up fisting and trying twice during very passionate sex, which he's never been that open to much with sex outside of normal stuff and sometimes anal, even before me (he was alone for about 8 years except one girl right before me that he only slept with twice... She told him he couldn't cuz it hurt but really she was sleeping with her ex and another guy all the time) sorry rambling. I've always kinda been more open except he does dirty talk sometimes. I just always thought fisting was just ramming your first in and out, so it seemed a bit beyond BDSM... Anyway he was being slow and gentle during long passionate sex, he's tried twice, it didn't work either time. I'm just extremely curious what the attraction is for that with a man and what to expect.

[SueShe]

Let me see if I get that correctly.

Do you mean that he wants to insert his fist into your vagina? Is that what I should understand under fisting?

Wait a second, let me just go vomit my guts out...

(10 minutes later) - ok, I am back.

I did not know that there would be such a thing. I try not to be judgmental but if that is really what it is all about, I think it should become mandatory for men that are into that kind of perversion to have a certificate attesting that they did undergo that kind of treatment and that they are fully aware of what kind of humiliation it is.

Why would anyone humiliate, objectify and sexualize a woman to such an extend just so he can have HIS pleasure. Any woman that ever had to give natural birth would testify that the pain is unbearable when they have their first child.

I don't intend to be mean but I think men that even come up with those kind of ideas should undergo a mandatory psychological assessment.

I do feel so sorry with you that you have such a boyfriend. I am sure you deserve much better.

[PeteBy]

Believe it or not some women like it. I dated a woman who liked it. Not something I would normally do and didn't do anything for me, same with anal; but she liked it. Takes all sorts I guess.

[PrettyPriya]

I shudder at the thought.

[Th3ft]

@sueshe well it isn’t at all about humiliation or domination. And I honestly don’t see how you are getting either out of the simple act of pouting his fist in her pussy. I mean like @ewzill said if it is gentle… all pussys are designed to stretch to allow a head to come out. So why not allow a fist to go in?

[Ewzill]

You're trying at being non judgmental wasn't very good. Didn't even answer my question. I asked what the attraction was and wondered why after so long. I have never given natural birth, only C-section. He was not being forceful or mean and was going slow and stopped because it wasn't working. He wasn't being some weirdo freak like you're trying to make it out as. The guy I was with before him for over 15 years was 6ft talk and he is 5 4'. I'm kinda curious too if he just saw or read some porn and thought I would like it. Maybe you should try a little harder at figuring out how to be honest and non judgmental at the same time. Like hey I'm not into that and I think it's weird so no I don't no the attraction.

[Ewzill]

@PeteBy

[Ewzill]

@PeteBy thanks helpful

[SueShe]

@PeteBy Is there no end to human debauchery?

[Kichbazp_]

@sueshe People can go beyond any thing when it comes to Sex, Some girls want to get fisted and if this is done to a virgin girl or any Normal girl then : 1. she will bleed a lot and will pass out 2. she might die as well !

[SueShe]

@Kichbazp_ So, those perverts are willing to risk a person's life for their own pleasure, is that correct?

[Kichbazp_]

@sueshe I am from India and unfortunately rape has biggest one of the biggest crime Against Woman here, but what I want to add on here... No girl or Woman dies unless any kind of foreign object shoved in their vagina, So some Sub-Human rapist don't hesitate to show Rod or a fist in her vagina, which caused internal injury and heavy bleeding leads to death of the victim !

www.google.co.in/url

[whirled_up_girl]

As a nurse I cringe a little when people just talk about how easy the vagina can stretch, I can't paste of my profession sources because they are members only but I found a resource on the internet that describes the process of pregnancy/childbirth etc.

"Relaxin helps your body prepare for labor and delivery by loosening the pelvis's ligaments, bones, and muscles as you get closer to the big day. This helps to ease the process of delivering your baby."

Relaxin is basically a hormone the female body produce to make the passage of the baby easier, even then there can still be tears.

First, second, third and fourth degree vaginal tears

https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/labor-and-delivery/multimedia/vaginal-tears/sls-20077129#:~:text=Vaginal%20tears%20during%20childbirth%2C%20also,of%20tears%20are%20relatively%20common.

and then there can even be intercourse complications after the healing from all of this. (I did a short stint as a student at a women's health clinic).

So even though I personnally have no interesting in fisting, I'm not knocking the idea of a the desire for anyone to want to try it , but if they are going to compare it to childbirth then it's important to understand the risks and know the science of how the vagina stretches during childbirth and the complicatiions even from the most natural process of it. Saftey should always be a consideration with any kind of sexual activity.

[Anonymous]

Fisting is definitely on the more unusual side of sex acts in my opinion. It's not something I was drawn to but I saw it in amateur porn a few times so I knew it was a thing. When I was 23/24 I dated (sort of, it wasn't exclusive) a girl who was six years older than me for about a year. She was definitely more on the kinky side and we did some things I had never done before, and some I haven't done since, including vaginal fisting. We did it 4 or 5 times (her request) and I have to say it was pretty hot to have my whole hand inside her. It's all mental but it definitely was extremely arousing for me. It obviously was for her too. She had to be really turned on first to do it and it took like 10 minutes to work my hand in. Then I had to stay still for a few minutes to let her adjust. It was hard to tell how much of what she was feeling was pleasure and how much was pain but there was no question it was pleasurable for her. It's easy to tell when a woman reaches orgasm when you're entire hand is in her vagina. At first the hard part is getting in past the knuckles, but after a while, and after she had cum once or twice, it was easy for me to slip my whole hand in and out. Definitely some fun memories to wank to.

[Ewzill]

Thank you, that is actually extremely helpful.

[DannyUk2017]

To be honest... If you still want to be fukable after you break up with him (just in case)...
Don't even think about it... it will hurt like hell, plus to come to such a high stake just for HIS PLEASURE, i wouldn't even think how would you think after the breakup (used, humilliated, cheated, heart broken) etc, etc...
I had "normal sex" to a certain point felt like becomes "boring", but then i spiced things up a noch, with dirty talk, some "50 shades of gray" (menu 😁), different positions... an i can tell you everything changed... But all that "extreme" i don't think is worth it, in case 💩 hits the fan... and like someone on here saying, in case u need to go to hospital try "explaining that/situation"... 🤷‍♂️

[Ewzill]

If I was worried about what the hospital or people thought I wouldn't have asked the question on here. I saw on here when I was reading about it from people that have actually done it that taking your time and being turned on and relaxed enough doesn't cause damage and 'fisting' isn't actually ramming your fist in it's putting your palm on the pelvis then the fingers while you also do other stuff with either your mouth or your other hand to keep the woman turned on, relaxed and lubed natural or otherwise it creates intimacy and for both partners and orgasms for the woman and as long as you keep taking care of your vagina no it will not be ruined. Maybe we will stay together forever, maybe shit will hit the fan but I'm not going to let fucked up past relationships fuck with my current one. We love each other, I do actually trust him even though my ex cheated and no I'm not a wore out woman sleeping around , I was single for 2 years before him and with my ex over 15 years and just a few other people besides him I dated and didn't sleep with everyone. I know you didn't say that last part but I'm just waiting for someone to say it and I gotta go for a bit and get ready. But thank you and everyone

[DannyUk2017]

You welcome. At the end of the day you know better. Good luck and happy (sexing)... 😁

[Ewzill]

Thank you

[PrettyPriya]

I haven't the slightest clue what the attraction would be for either party. For the guy, it wouldn't seem to me that there is any pleasure gained by doing this during intimacy. For the girl, it seems it would be incredibly painful. So, not sure why a guy or girl would want to engage in such an act.

Just the thought of it makes me cringe really. I think any attraction to this sort of act is going to be driven by watch (maybe too much) porn and getting the idea this would be "fun". Uh, no thanks.

I cannot imagine the possible damage that could be caused either if not careful. This is not something I would ever agree to try and a major red flag if my SO brought this idea up. Again, I just don't see any value in this during intimacy. However, what others do in the privacy of their own home is their business.

I just would be very concerned about potential injuries. How do you explain that at the hospital I wonder.

[Th3ft]

I definitely get that it wouldn’t be that pleasurable and I can’t imagine that it would be a great passionate moment at all. But if he is general why can’t a man pout his fist in a pussy without hurting her? I don’t mean any disrespect and I have thought about this one for a LoNG time. I’m just curious. If he is general how would it cause damage?

[PrettyPriya]

@Th3ft The vagina can tear. While a fist (in general) is likely not going to be the size of a baby, the vaginal opening is typically not that wide, even though the asker has had a child. Just like any muscle can tear, so can that. Think if you lift something too heavy and hurt your back. That is a good analogy to injuring a muscle, which the vagina is. Except in this scenario, it can be completely avoided by simply not engaging in that sort of act, which is very much going to be porn based.

[Th3ft]

@prettypriya I totally agree that it is porn based and I have absolutely no clue where I got the idea from except the possible porn video. And yeah I guess i didn’t think about tarring because when woman are aroused they are more stretchable and playable right? But I can see staying away from that for that reason for sure! No one wants to hurt a woman here.

[PrettyPriya]

@Th3ft I'm not suggesting there is intent to hurt someone, just that it is a possibility. The thing that gets me is the lack of physical pleasure that I think would come from this for either party. So, then if that is the case, why bother is my thought?

[Th3ft]

No that is fair! And if it really isn’t pleasurable then it is pointless. But I would think that it is that thickness that would make it pleasurable. You know? Like how thick do you like your toys to be?

[Ewzill]

@Th3ft He was being gentle and making sure I was ok, we were having long passionate sex, and any sign of discomfort he slowed down and pain he stopped. It's not something I would have considered before but I looked at it different before, I'm just very curious now what the attraction is in doing it for a man, and what to expect as a woman because it was intimate and pleasurable so far

[PrettyPriya]

@Th3ft Well, we are getting into a whole other discussion that is going to vary from girl to girl depending on their anatomy. Just like guys, girls will vary. I don't want to get too explicit here. I hope you pick up what I'm about to put down. In order for me to be intimate with my partner, I have to be properly aroused. Even then, it is a pre-flight checklist and take things very slow to start. I have to be in total control. If not, someone might be over anxious a bit and OUCH! So, for me this would be a totally unpleasurable thing to do based on my experience with my partner.

[Kichbazp_]

I had seen a real fisting of a Iraqi girl " Allegedly " by US Marine Solders during US -Iraq was, That video accidentally leaked and it got so big controversy around the World !

[Kichbazp_]

**US-Iraq War in 2003

[Ewzill]

@Th3ft From what I read from people that have actually done it before if you do it right by taking your time and make sure the woman is turned on and relaxed enough and lubed plenty natural or otherwise and keep her that way by also using your mouth or other hand at the same time it doesn't cause damage or ruin the woman, it creates more intimacy for both partners and intense orgasm for the woman... To do it correctly there would have to be trust between the two. I get why everyone thinks that I thought it was something I would never be ok with either cause I thought it was something different

[Ewzill]

@Kichbazp_ I've never seen it before and that sounds awful. It would be painful if done with I'll intent

[Kichbazp_]

@ewzill One of My friend had the video, Any girl will get scared to see that fisting video, It is more like a WAR Crime Video

[Lillylux22]

Yes it absolutely can hurt, it usually does if time isn't taken to work up to it. in my opinion, I love it. Once fully inside, it makes me feel so full. It shouldn't be ramming in and out, for us its all about hitting and rubbing pleasure spots.

[Guy13]

No idea. Sounds painful. Better avenue for prostrate stimulation

[20yearsolder]

First off, are you interested in being fisted? If you answer no then you need to tell him to stop. I don't know what the fascination of putting your hand inside a woman is. I've done it, it was requested by her. She had to be super horny, very relaxed and it took a while. But I finally got my whole hand in her pussy

[Th3ft]

@ewzill I have never done it and never met a girl that would be okay with it. But I am curious and I guess that makes me attracted to it. Lol!
But I would think that if a woman likes the feeling of a thick dick up there why not try to gently and slowly as needed slid a fist up there?
i mean you said he has done it twice to you right? Did it feel good did it hurt?

[Ewzill]

Thank you guys for being honest and non judjy. He's just recently tried twice but it didn't work, like ya know told me he wanted to try and did it slow like I saw it described and could only get 3 fingers the first time then stopped cuz he didn't want it to hurt and the next time almost his 4th finger but it wasn't working so he stopped. To be honest yes him going slow trying felt good, but the idea of it working is scary

[Th3ft]

That is totally fair I have only heard of people taking a bit to work it out and used lots of lube as well as making sure she was SO wet naturally to work it up to a full fist. But like @prettypriya is saying how pleasurable can it be?

[Ewzill]

I read some women say it's incredibly pleasurable and they even like extra fingers in there... Apparently all the fingers are on the g spot

[Th3ft]

@ewzill see that is what I was figuring would be the pleasure of it. I suppose that if you need cliteral stimulation though you wouldn’t at all enjoy it.

[FunkyMonkee]

When I first heard of it about 20 years ago, I thought it was REALLY cool and got into it. I unintentionally got away from it for a while (a few years) and the next time I saw it, it just wasn't interesting to me anymore! Like, "Okay, I've seen you do that trick a few dozen times. I appreciate it and still KINDA like it, MAYBE some day, I'll try it but, I just don't feel like watching it anymore."

The weird one would, I guess, be called, "Footing". Same as fisting but you shove your foot up there! Again, it was VERY interesting the first time I saw it but, that one QUICKLY bit the dust, with me! After seeing it maybe 3 times, I was done! What, exactly, is the point? Okay, you've got the front half of your foot up her pussy! Great! No what? You can't exactly "toe" her! (As opposed to fingering her.)

[stratford]

Did he manage to get his hand inside you? Or never past the 3rd knuckle? What techniques have you tried?

I've been told that she feels very 'full' and loves that feeling.

[Googlemyahoo]

He must be watching some hardcore abuse porn

[Kichbazp_]

@ewzill Fisting can hurt you a lot !

[Ewzill]

Then what is the sudden interest in it? When I looked on here I saw a bunch of comments about how it's actually some great emotional connection and both the men and women enjoy it. Is it control or just to see how far he can go?

[CloudMassacre]

It’s like, they like the pleasure so much, that their body changes to accommodate their more extreme wants. I don’t like it to be a pain thing, it’s better as a pleasure thing

[Nikki1989]

I guess some women see it a test for themselves. I have never felt any enjoyment from it.

[Lenell]

I dont get that fetish. Ies rather have my dick i her.

[AndrésC64]

Eeeewwwwww...

[Philyouup]

my girlfriend loves to be fisted. but after we get real hot love how my hand feel inside her, she loves the stretching and full feeling.


i want to train her for anal fisting , but she not hot on the idea. but i’m just happy that she’s very anal.

[Guardian45]

Full disclosure: I have NEVER done this. One of GFs did this with a guy and ended up in hospital with tear injuries and taking antibiotics for infection. She was sore for about two weeks!

That turned me right off of this for life!

[LaMiSch]

It really has no appeal for me. But like anything, different people have different preferences. But I certainly like some things that are not appealing to others 🙈😅

[Ewzill]

I figured in real life it would be more of a turn off

[LaMiSch]

Don't get me wrong, maybe I like it too, I've never tried it 😁 I just never had the urge to do it 😅 You never stop learning, just last year I discovered something very good for me 🙈😅

[Anonymous]

Start with a woman with small hands.

[Anonymous]

i personally have a fetish for that. sadly i never got a woman to wanna try it. i guess it is sort of idiotic and wrong but in my mind, larger insertion equals larger pleasure and since pleasure is what i wanna give her, that's the explanation for my fetish.

[Anonymous]

Sex should be an act of love and that really seems like it has to hurt. In one of his sext messages to a 14-year-old, Anthony Weiner told her he’d like to “tear that tight pussy up.” That sounds painful!

I wouldn’t talk like that to a grown woman, let alone a girl! I can’t imagine finding pleasure in anything that would hurt, degrade or humiliate the woman.

[Anonymous]

I've never done it and don't think it is appealing but I know a married couple who do it and enjoy it. They started when she was pregnant with their first child as a way to prepare her for the birth. Many women tear down there during childbirth, and fisting, or what some call "perineal massage", is a way of stretching the vagina and perineal area so that she won't tear during childbirth. They both ended up enjoying it and they still do it sometimes now during sex (they have two kids now and are done having kids). She doesn't know I know, lol.