Best friend wants to have sex?

[turtl3man]

A girl I've been best friends with for 2 years but only met face to face once. One day she got drunk and texted me about how horny she was and how her ex was an ass. Then she starts talking about how people need to be direct about asking for sex? Obvious hint is obvious, but she's drunk so I wait till she says she is sober so I can ask if she wants to have sex (totally to see if I was what she wanted, didn't care if she said no) but when I asked, she said yes. The next day, still confused as hell, I ask if she was being legit, still says yes... I even had to ask if she wanted to talk about her problem with her ex instead of having sex to see if she just wanted to use me as a rebound, she just said I was sweet and she admires how much I care, but I doubt she has changed her mind about sex. My question isn't whether or not she likes me more than a friend, because that's obvious. My question is how am I going to be able to keep seeing her as a friend now that she's opened up her desires?

[hellionthesagereborn]

Well I don't think that's possible. I think at some point the tension will be to much and she will have to break off your friendship so that she can move on. I presume that you have no interest in her?

[turtl3man]

I kinda just confessed to her and now we both know we like each other and I'm at the point where I can make the friends with benefits thing work

[hellionthesagereborn]

Well wouldn't that mean that if you both like each other not only is their no problem then but you would go for a relationship? Why a friends with benefits?

[turtl3man]

I just feel more comfortable being friends with girls than being in a relationship, relationships to me feel like contracts.

[hellionthesagereborn]

How so? I mean are you just not going to have a relationship forever?

[turtl3man]

Who knows... I don't see what the problem is

[turtl3man]

What I mean by "relationships feeling like contracts" is that you start a relationship by going out on a date or whatever and admitting your feelings to the other person. You have to continue being in the relationship by spending time together with no one else, which is pretty inconvenient for your other friends who wanna communicate to you in any way during that time. My biggest concern is the ability to tear off the entire relationship by announcing you want to "break up". So that's how it feels like a contract, if you "complete" the contract you get married, and there are a handful of requirements to keep it going or it'll fall apart. You don't need to do much to sustain a friendship, all you gotta do is make sure you're not an asshole 😂

[hellionthesagereborn]

Well if your not being with friends while in a relationship then something is terribly wrong with your relationship. You can have friends and a relationship. Now the other part is true, it is hard work but I would also say its worth it in the long run (as long as you work well together and communicate with each other) but it is most definitely an investment. Though again, keep in mind their is a reason we tend to do this, it has its perks, I mean men who are married are happier then there single counter parts and they are healthier and live longer (statistically speaking), so clearly their has to be some upsides. Though its your choice obviously, not trying to force anything (not that I could even if I wanted to) do what evers comfortable just keep in mind some times we end up missing out because we convince ourselves standing on the sidelines was better.(I cannot tell you how many times I see people throw something good away over something stupid.).

[hellionthesagereborn]

Maybe talk to her about it, who knows maybe she has a similar view or she might be willing to take it really slow.

[turtl3man]

Taking it slow was literally what she told me she wanted haha

[hellionthesagereborn]

Well that might be a good start. Either way good luck.

[Harrisontb]

Well maybe seeing her as a friend isn't the option to go for? It depends on if she just wants to have sex, but if she wants more than just that, try to be more than friends. That's what id do at least.

[turtl3man]

Another thing I forgot to point out, the kind of relationship she wants is friends with benefits. She wants to be intimate and have sex without labels

[Harrisontb]

Well seeing her as a friend will be hard. I know I couldn't do it, but I've been single for so long I couldn't see any girl as "just friends" if they liked me in any way even if just remotely.

[vittle1999]

Does she stop being your friend post sex or desires for sex? If your answer is no, she continues to be your friend no matter what happens or doesn't happen sexually.

[NerdInDenial]

Is she hot?

[turtl3man]

Oh yeah forgot to mention that. Yes she's really attractive

[NerdInDenial]

Be smart and use a condom

[turtl3man]

Cheers dude

[darklandrunner]

JUST DO IT!

[turtl3man]

Chillax dude I didn't say I wasn't going to do it

[darklandrunner]

Lol. Sorry im just in that mood where I wanna type that as an opinion. But it's cool that you are gonna do it.

[averagejoe805]

Best friends and you’ve only seen her once?

[turtl3man]

I met her on tinder (when 13 year olds could use it) and we've been chatting up. Was going down the friend road for a while because I was really enjoying talking to her and ended up being her best friend

[turtl3man]

The distance makes it inconvenient for meet ups and that one occasion was when we both made individual plans to go to the same place

[darkpsycer]

If you've confessed, go into a relationship. Why do you need to be friends with benefits

[turtl3man]

The expectations from being in a relationship is too much for me to handle for me 😂

[turtl3man]

Lol wtf I can't English

[darkpsycer]

Being in a relationship may be hard, but being friends with benefits and staying friends after is harder

[turtl3man]

Really?

[darkpsycer]

Yeah, they are