Boyfriend can’t cum anymore?

[Anonymous]

We’ve been together 3 years and the last month or two I can’t seem to make him cum. I do the same things during a blowjob, I’ve given him a blowjob for 40 minutes straight and he still didn’t cum.

He said he’s bored of sex and blowjobs with me cos they’re all the same and that’s why he can’t cum. I’m always the one to initiate sex he literally never does. I’ve tried dirty talking during blowjobs , I’ve put on lingerie.

What else can I do? He just seems so bored and doesn’t want me sexually and I can’t even make him cum, it’s killing my confidence.

[chrissykerdock]

guys generally love blowjobs the fact you gave head for 40 minutes is a good thing in many ways... lingerie and wearing shortskirts works... in case you didn't know working his head licking sucking and kissing his vein behind the head or the other side gets a guy to cum... or may have to rim him that's the atomic weapon in giving oral sex... but giving blowjobs can be arousing for both parties... to get your confidence find someone you can give a blowjob to... i'm sure there's plenty of men who'd like one from you it doesn't have to be a boyfriend.

[LeeannaDD]

Wild guess but if he has a porn addiction, that could be why

[Anonymous]

Why are you still together if he's telling you he's bored of you and obviously showing how bored he is? Maybe him not having a girlfriend will cure his boredom. He'll get used to his hand again.

[Asker]

Well he still says he loves me and he’s always said s*x isn’t the most important part of a relationship but I feel so shitty and like a bad girlfriend that I can’t make him cum and I’m boring and predictable. Like I give him blowjobs till my jaw hurts and it’s still not enough. Is this common for guys to get bored like this? He does the same things to me all the time and I still cum and have never gotten bored

[Opinion Owner]

I think he's probably caring about you but sexually bored. For guys the natural desire for variety (different girls) is strong. Some guys are better at overcoming it and some guys use po*n as a means to cope. You're not a bad girlfriend I'm sure, you're trying but it's not really you, it's him that's the issue.

[Asker]

Yeah I understand this, does this mean he’ll cheat or break up with me? Like I’m so worried about that :(

[ShiftingMonke]

Has he given you any ideas on what he would want you to do? Have you suggested or tried to use any toys during?

[Asker]

No ideas at all. He said my dirty talk is all the same but I’ve said so much dirty talk there’s not much new to say. We have toys but he doesn’t really like them too much

[ShiftingMonke]

Well I'd hate to ask personal questions in the public space, but some men really enjoy prostate stimulation during oral sex; this could be as simple as a massaging wand pressed against the perineum, or light stimulation of his anus. Obviously I would gain his consent before acting on this advice, but that may be the next step to try.

[Asker]

No he would hate that I joked about it before but he has no interest in that. I’m not sure what else to do if he’s bored , it’s honestly quite upset me and I’m worried

[Asker]

He said why worry but how can I not? I can’t make him cum and he’s bored. and it’s my fault..

[ShiftingMonke]

If he's not interested in you performing this act on him, there isn't anything inherently wrong with that; I strongly dislike it myself. I've never asked my partner to do it, and it's not a thing that regularly happens. Rather than take it as a personal attack on your skill level, maybe you can instead focus on pleasing each other in different ways.

[linda86]

he jacked off earlyer.

[Fireguy17]

is he by chance on an antidepressant?
those can make it harder to have a happy ending.
Maybe try something else, mix it up.

[Asker]

No nothing like that, it’s like he’s all of sudden not able to cum by my blowjobs anymore cos they’re all the same. But would that make a difference on if you cum or not? He’s always liked them before and I haven’t changed anything

[Fireguy17]

maybe he just needs more stimulation/friction. Sometimes while some sex acts feel good, there just isn't enough friction to get him over the edge. My wife is great at giving footjobs, they feel great but it takes longer to have a happy ending that when she does a hand job, but that it justfine with me because the visual of her doing that is really hot. try more manual stimulation first, get him really close and then finish him off that way. maybe he is just distracted by changes at work, his boss is being more of a butt peanut, who knows. he might not even realize it himself. Mix it up a bit. Good luck.

[stratford]

This is a tricky one. He probably likes the thrill of the chase, and if you are the one to initiate everytime, he probably feels like sex is 'on tap'. Perhaps you can try and tease him but don't actually initiate sex, make him chase you a bit more.

Have you also tried some other more risque or kinky things like anal, throat fucking, 69, etc?

[jjj101010]

Have u asked him what will help

[Asker]

Yes and he says new things in general but never gives me ideas it’s always up to me to think of new ideas

[jjj101010]

What have u tried. Happy to discuss if u want to dm me

[kareka]

Try new things to break the routine

[Anonymous]

Have you put on a lot of weight?

[Anonymous]

either he is masturbating a lot or getting it somewhere else, most likely option A

[Anonymous]

Finger his bum while sucking