Boyfriend got a little bit embarrassed during an intimate moment. Is that normal?

[Anonymous]

For a bit of context, we are both 26, in our first relationship, and we met on hinge in June 2022; we made things official in August, and things are going great for us.
We took things relatively slow and only began experimenting sexually in November. Since then, we have tried a lot of different something, such as oral, fingering, kissing, handjobs etc., but we haven't had PIV sex yet and most likely will not until I get on permanent birth control. With that being said, I had given him several handjobs, but he has never ejaculated from them.
My arm would get tired, lol, so yesterday, he told me that he would like to put a condom on and that we could try it that way as one of his mental blocks was that he didn't want to make a mess, so we tried for about 15 minutes, and he finally came and right as he came, he got up from the bed quickly and told me he had to clean up and seemed so nervous lol so I told him not worry about it and that even if it got on my hand, it wasn't a big deal as I would clean it up as well.
As we commuted back to my home, he told me he enjoyed it, and it was quite an experience.

Is my question that is it usual for men to get embarrassed in this situation?
Thanks!

[PositiveFlight]

For me the first few times I ejaculated in front of a girl and made a mess, I was pretty embarrassed. Look at it from the standpoint that up to this point, I boy is used to ejaculating alone with no audience but it can be a self conscious thing in front of a girl the first time because it’s a mess of our own body fluid and we don’t want the girl we love to be grossed out. But as a boy matures, it’s realized that semen is very pure and it’s intended specifically for the good of a woman, not just to inseminate but also as a delivery of a very potent biochemical mixture of components that specifically make women happy and attracted through dopamine, oxytocin, and many others formulated for her female specific brain chemistry. It’s literally made just for her. That and it’s the visual response to a woman that she is attractive to him, that he loves her, and that his body is reacting to both visual and physical stimulation that she has played a major part in achieving. It’s a special gift for her. Once a boy realizes this, he becomes no longer self-conscious and enjoys giving what his body was meant to give the woman he loves

[DaveJord]

You know I cannot say, but it sounds normal... first time I ejaculated with a woman she was dry humping me and I exploded before I could even try to control it. But I was like 16... so I have no real idea what type of mental blocks someone who is a virgin t 26 might have about sex.

For me I was more ashamed that I orgasm before she was able to get in... because that is where it was all leading up to... so it was a premature ejaculation on my part. I embarrassed but more upset with myself because I really wanted to put it in... and she was more than okay with that.

But I think listening to your story it is really kind of sweet and that you were really nice and great about it and that that's really sweet. and I think if you two can continue to communicate like that with each other that you will really have a strong and meaningful relationship... so I would not be concerned about it at this point.

[God_of_Thunder]

That's honestly a new one, for me.

It sounds like he has some sort of a hang up about semen, but I can't, for the life of me, understand why that would be the case. It's almost like he's disgusted by it, for some reason.

I would honestly say I don't believe that's normal. I think most guys are quite the opposite, in fact. My advice would be to speak to him about it, and ask why it bothers him so much, because I don't have a clue, myself.

I love making a mess, lol. I find it erotic when it ends up on my partner. Even more so if she really enjoys it. I can only speak for myself, but I think most men would feel the same way.

[Reece12345]

Totally. Especially when starting out with something new. You often feel like you're in the spotlight.

I think he felt very vulnerable since was the first time you did this. A woman seeing this very intimate aspect of himself. Like getting caught jerking, almost. Seeing him cum.

Very hot and exciting but also very awkward for some guys.

[mrmonogamous]

It me, not ever. When a guy cums, a mess is expected. It depends on where it is if it’s even an issue.

[Summeroflove]

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[Dargil]

Pickup the clean-up on a hand job. Keep one of these beside the bed.

And, when he comes, tell him "Wow! you came a lot!! Flatter him and make him feel comfortable.

[ArtemisSilver]

Sounds like some kind of cum mess related childhood trauma

[Danisgivingit]

Maybe if it’s his first time. However, if he isn’t busting quickly I’d assume he either jerks off a lot or has done it before. I’m not a fan of the mess either, but not something I’d say I get embarrassed about. Especially if she is okay with everything

[Pudsmucker]

He may not have wanted to get it on your Sheets or he was concerned that it might get into your vagina somehow.

[Guardian45]

He sounds like a virgin, so no.

[OddBeMe]

He’s weird as fck. Even my OCD takes a back seat to sex.

[Anonymous]

Sorry but your boyfriend seems to be having mental issues

[Anonymous]

No, he probably is a virgin and no experience but even when I was a virgin I didn’t get embarrassed from that. He definitely hasn’t had much experience and is very shy