Boyfriend is bored of our sex life?

Question

Every week, he starts a fight saying that he’s unhappy with our sex life, when I suggest ideas or things to spice it up, they’re either not kinky or good enough for him or we’ve done them before , or mentioned them before , they’re not new etc. I have a list of things that I’ve thought and he doesn’t like any of them he says they’re shit ideas. He says he’s never had this issue with any other girls so makes me feel like I’m the problem. He says he wants our sex life to be perfect and amazing, I feel like it’s good and I’m happy but he’s not.

I’ve asked him for his input but he never has any ideas I’m always the one trying to think of stuff to do and it’s honestly stressing me out because we have done so much in the bedroom it’s hard to think of completely new stuff but I wanna keep him happy.

And the stuff I have done I’ve apparently done it wrong according to him my dirty talk is shit, my nudes are all the same hence boring, we’ve wrote each other sex stories too and he says mine weren’t as good as his, I’ve sexted guys and sent him the conversations cos he’s into that and I did that wrong too. Any help or even suggestions on new sex ideas would be appreciated. I’m completely at a loss and so stressed :(

Makeushiver · Accepted Answer

Next time he brings up the topic - no first go to your local hardware store and ask for "vice grips" thease are handy to have around after using dor intended. Get a legal pad and make some notes about things like 1) how obnoxious is he & 2) how boring he is in the sack nd perhaps a brief note about sizes and such. Estimate the girth of the offending member and adjust these variable pliers to about 1 1/2 inches less than the estimated girth of offending member, put aside but within a comfortable reach at any point at which he proclaims- sorry, you may need to visit an area that specializes in salt water fishing. Ask about the biggest bottom feeding fish his are caught near there. When he tells you ask him the approximate weight of aforementioned bottom dweller- the fish not your boyfriend. Tell the proprietor that you want bait to be capable of holding your tackle on the bottom in Force 10 winds. He will probably estimate the proper weight and hand you a pretty heavy "sinker". Then tell him that you forgot but your boyfriend is also coming so you actually need 2 x the weight. He may look at you crefully to see if you're armed or showing any kin of psychotic break. fuck him and tell him to give you what you requested or you'll go to Marks and Spencer for it. You'll need a biy of monofilament or nylon string- about 50 weight. Light a candle to ensure a romantic mood. Tell him you've waiting for quite some time to feast your eyes on his glorious manhood. Sorry I should have mentioned pre-knotting fishing line. on one end you want the vice grips on the ither the 509 # of salmon weight. Here you will see the benefit of vice grips. When he feels the crowd is ready to see his now exposed glorious manhood. Act bubbly and tell him you are quite sorry for being so boring but you came up with a really sexy surprise. Attach vice grips to GM (glorious manhood) and toss the whole package out the highest window. At this point there will be multiple things happening. As long as they are predominantly beneficial to you, do nothing. Meanwhile the owner and proprietor of GM will probably babbling and you can safely ignore him. Or alternatively you can point out that having given it some though you agree with him. Try to keep the ending as playful as possible, perhaps commenting- its sure not boring tonight, some guy's cock is learning to fly. Just a suggestion. Has Sir Pumpaload ever gotten you off in any way that could pass as sex or at least a good try. In either case you will probably see boyfriend standing by window w/ no clothes on. Point out the exciting feature. If it seem as like it would br a good idea give him your beat "old pals back slap using enough force to ensure everything is even less boring He could be grateful that the 50# lead weights possess little threat for a "penectomy". If you'd like hold on to all receipts and return items- Cosmo has had some great articles on "women and the tools they use". If preferred hold into all hardware in case you to drop it on him again- or, you can return everything while completing yourself an very effective and budget conscious problem solver. If anyone seems dissatisfied mention the increasingly psychotic break he seemed to be having while walking around the house saying weird things like "I'll get those salty little badgers on their own damn turf. After all this excitement you deserve a cup of herbal tea. Enjoy

Caliguy88 · Accepted Answer

That’s stupid. My long term gfs were probably not the best in bed in the since they would surprise me with stuff but I’m a kinky bastard and they would let me do whatever I wanted. I loved that. Like, they were hot, great bodies, ect…. But my two long ones didn’t really care for oral etc. But they’d let me do it. One of my ex’s was all about shower stuff. I know she didn’t really love it but she let me do it. If you try a bunch of stuff and he’s not happy, sorry…. Move on. On the flip side…. I went out with a girl for a little while…. She wanted it so hard and aggressive, it just was not me. I did it to make her happy but after a while… it was like…. This isn’t me…. I didn’t like it really and we just faded. If it’s not a fit in bed. No hard feelings with me….

EmmaMary · Accepted Answer

Reading what you've written strongly suggests that he's become extremely bad news, a Red Flag... Sadly it's time for you to move on with your life... Sorry.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Sometimes the way to fix problems is someone else.

Guy13 · Answer

You poor thing. He realizes the stress he’s putting on things? He watches to much porn?

Emilyis · Answer

It's over, get rid of him.

Summeroflove · Answer

He’s using you for sex

oddwaffle · Answer

Without knowing what you have tried before nobody can offer advice girl. Be open with what you have done before.

You need to know what he likes first. Get one if those BDSM sheet and let him fill it out.

Most men like to be dom but they don't really have what it takes because it does require a whole lot of work.

Dargil · Answer

The same answer as an above post. "It can help to add new elements to it. We added anal play to it. Blow job/hand job with anal fingering or even on its own. There other things you can add as well."

exitseven · Answer

Ask him if he would like you to invite one of your female friends to have sex with the two of you and see what he says. It might be time to dump him.

Sparkie460 · Answer

Tie him to the bed. Get some hot guy for yourself. Have him fuck you on the bed next to your boyfriend. Ask your boyfriend if that was kinky enough. If he didn't like it make the new guy your boyfriend and kick your current guy to the curb.