Deciding not to have sex in my 20s?

I just want my 20s to be about me and my establishment. Finishing school, traveling and reaching goals.
im an overly emotional person and I feel that other people’s energy may stick to me if I have sex with them.

i think I just want to wait to lose my virginity
Updates:
+1 y
Is this an achievable goal or is it stupid? Not shaming anyone because I would love to have sex with a lot of men but I know I’m too emotional I just hope I’m not missing out by not having sex
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Nearly everyone on their deathbeds at old age confesses the same thing- that they wished that the spent less time working and more time living. That they didn't do more in their youth when their bodies were capable...

    Sex in youth is better than sex later. It's still great in later years, but the youthful exuberance is gone, and sex quality is lessened for it. If you skip it through your 20's you will regret it later. Enjoy LIFE now. You only get to live your 20's once.

    As for emotions, that's all part of dating and experimenting. You will just have to learn to recognize what is good for you and what isn't.

    And on another note- if you wait until your 30's you are going to be forced to date only people who are divorced, never married, or messed up in other ways, the quality of the pool will be severely diminished. Even dating after 25 becomes a drag, because most people get married by then and what's left are the undesirables (not ALL- this is not a blanket generalization but a reality that exists - most loving people who wanted to be married already are by 25, 30 at the latest, but the majority of them will be in committed relationships.).

  • I admire the fact that you are giving importance to your goals. That is important. Don't aim for sex, if you connect with someone, it will happen. If i were you i would just see how things go when it comes to sex whilst still strongly sticking by my goals.

    • Yeah I’m not trying to be holy Mary but I thought that it would help me in some way

Most Helpful Girls

  • I like to spread this message...

    You exchange a piece of yourself with everyone you have sex with, and you carry that the rest of your life. Whether it be bacteria/viruses, a child, or a fragment of your heart and soul, you cannot undo it once it is done.

    You are very wise to skip sex in your 20's. You won't be missing out on anything. Most people are too immature to bring much of value to the table in the bedroom or a relationship at those ages. There's just a lot of heartache that could have been avoided. Not to mention, STD's are steeply rising and most common in people in their teens and 20's...

    Good luck!

  • That’s totally fine! If you’re not ready and want to focus on school, then go for it!

    • I actually really wanted to with this guy even though he was really shitty to me. I was having insecurities about my body so I didn’t go through with it and I’m glad I didn’t. I would have been a mess He was so shitty to me. Didn’t even want to take me out for lunch

    • Sounds like you dodged a bullet with that guy. It’s okay if you don’t feel ready right now, just wait till you are. :)

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What Girls & Guys Said

2 16
  • Do it! Don't wait so late that you turn into a crazy lady. As long as you keep your Socializing up you will be good.

    In doing this you'll have a change to learn about yourself and heal if needed and you'll probably end up with a rich guy... who's also worked on himself.

    Keep a good social circle and meditate..

  • Wow, don't see the real upside to that, but knock yourself out.

  • You an do whatever you like you just have to know that if you want to have a family if you only start looking in your thirties it's gonna be really tough.

  • Good for you.

    • Is that being sarcastic? I just want to know if that’s doing too much or if it’s stupid

    • *are you being sarcastic

    • Nope. It really isn't something stupid or intelligent. Do what you like.

  • Excellent idea.

  • So you want to be a 30yr old virgin?
    It's your life. Personally i'd say its a bad plan. Relationships are a big part of life, activepy putting yourself on the self throughout your prime years feels like a wasted opportunity. Traveling is more enjoyable with someone.

  • Sex is a natural desire. Id advise to not place artificial boundaries that deep down you know you can't keep. You just dont know what or who is around the corner of your life. Best to go with the flow. As for energy... experience their energy, learn from it. Dont shut yourself off from other energy fields. Have sex with those men who simply make you feel good in yourself. Sex isn't only about commitment its also an expression of your personality. Enjoy it.

  • I admire your maturity and ambitions.

    but dude just like the vast majority of today's women you're glorifying sex beyond the extreme. just because you had sex with someone you are now automatically married and committed to that person in any way.

    sex is just sex. just be sure that person you're having it isn't toxic and from there on just wear protection, take birth control or whatever and just move on with your life.

  • i don't quite understand how "having sex" is in the way of you reaching your goals. i also don't understand why you consider "virginity" as a "valuable thing you don't wanna lose" but you do you.
    your life, your decision.

  • Sounds pointless to me, but to each their own. Good luck.

  • Good plan. Just don't forget life deals you cards and sometimes it doesn't always go the way you want.

  • it's a good idea. If you meet someone so amazing, so incredible, and really see a future together, I'm sure you will break the rule, but having the rule is good because it will protect your future

  • Don't loose the educational desire. Education has many long lasting and rewarding benefits. Orgasms don't last long and drain you mentally and physically. Treat that pussy like a fine wine and let it age naturally.

  • In other words, you've had no luck dating and you're so put off because of your inability to change, you lie to yourself and say not having sex is ok.

    Got it

    • Ouchhh

    • Yes. I’ve never had much of a love life and I haven’t been very lucky. I've never had a boyfriend. Never had guys interested in me. Never this. Never that. I’m aware. So since no guys pay attention to me anyway I guess I could just keep it that way. I would like to have sex but I haven’t been lucky and the guys I do talk to are shitty. What do you suggest I do then? 🙄

    • My ability to change what exactly?

    • Show All
  • You are looser... you must live that wonderfull pleasure and feelings

  • Well not bad idea why not

  • Give me a call when you hit 30 cause you are going to be out of control.. you may just fuck all the way through your 30's.

  • You should just wait until you are married.

    • I don’t know if I want to get married honestly I don't know

    • You will, once you find the right person.

    • Also your goal is plenty achievable. I'm still a virgin.