Do guys really gain any kind of pleasure when they degrade their girlfriend in bed?

[Anonymous]

Is it really a power thing for you guys to show that you're physically stronger OR do most of guys do it or form a emotional bond of trust?

For eg one of my ex used to be rough on me in bed and used to say that I'm so innocent and weak, in short he always used to tell me indirectly that he's rough on me because I'm too weak to resist or reject.

But my current boyfriend who's rough too, always makes sure to tell me how he's getting more emotionally attach to me because of trust I show.

[0112358]

If she’s into it, definitely.

I think it’s a power thing partly, proof of her arousal partly, emotional bonding partly.

on the power side - it’s almost like my desire for her is so strong that equality is impossible. Either I need control over her or I’m trapped by my own needs.

on the arousal side - I want sex primarily because of lust and arousal. The pleasure is like a bonus. While I enjoy making my partner feel pleasure and orgasm (a lot! Feeds into power side plus it’s hot) that’s sort of the least sexy reason she could be with me. If she’s basically like “yeah fine this feels good” that’s so disappointing. I want her to want me the way I crave her. And when a woman is into sex that is sort of hard on her in some way it’s like proof her desire is fuelled by something beyond “that feels nice”.

the emotional side? All the above seems slightly fucked up and her wanting it is also a little fucked up. To find someone where our dark parts aren’t just accepted, but fit together, where sides of ourself we might feel ashamed of or need to hide aren’t just okay but are in fact needed, wanted and desired by someone we desire, is almost intoxicating.

[wassim97]

Well for me I don’t enjoy doing this I’ll never degrade my partner in bed if this doesn’t make you feel pleasure or you don’t like it just tell him to stop sexual activity must be pleasurable for both sides

[AustinMan]

First and foremost: do you enjoy them being rough?

[JPrez]

Only if the girl is ok with it and enjoys the dirty talk. If you don’t like it, speak up. If it makes no difference, do it for him and then ask him to do something you like.

[Valnac]

I respect women and don’t play rough unless they ask me.

[REDHOTLINE]

No i dont actually I hate tbat