Do I really want to have sex or I'm just lacking intimacy?

Okay, so for the past 2 months, I've been thinking about sex a lot and I don't know why.

I've spent the last 2 years in love with this men but out relationship never became physical. We were just friends from work and I ended up developing feeling for him but due to covid and quarentine I think our relationship got a bit shaky so when it was time for me to confess, I didn't get the answers that I wanted and I ended up confused about his feelings towards me.
We are not currently talking but when we sometimes meet each other randomly, it's all good.

It's been almost 9 months since we last saw each other and I've been trying to focus on my things without much thoughts about him but now I've been craving the feeling of having sex with someone (not him).

The thing is, I'm willing to to it but it needs to be with someone I'm attracted to and that's the part that it's making me confused because if I was really craving it, then all those physical attributes shouldn't metter, right? I should be able to just randomly go to a guy and asking if he's down to it.

I tried sexting and masturbate often but Im still craving it, so what am I supposed to do know?
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Okay I don't know if you're going to understand this or not we as a person our whole body we think that we are just us but inside of us we have energy the energy is our true real self when energy falls in love with somebody it's because you can feel that person like right now I can feel you from where I'm at to where you are it's just our energy it's a very beautiful feeling very beautiful sensation if you understand energy you understand what I'm trying to say who went to energies become one it is the most beautiful feeling you ever feel in your life that's what's going on is you're allowing your energy to feel something beautiful now if you can do it at the same time you're doing it you guys will melt together it's very interesting it's something that you should experience

  • First, Hitachi Magic Wand.
    Second, start actively looking on dating apps. If you're truly diligent about it, within 3 months you should have 3 solid prospects. How do I know? Cuz that's what I did! TADA! A girlfriend!

    • Thank you for MHG!

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Sex for a lot of people is more than merely a physical act, and they want intimacy and closeness with it. It's fair to assume that you do want intimacy too, but it doesn't sound like that alone will quench your thirst. I'd guess you are craving both at the moment.

  • "The thing is, I'm willing to to it but it needs to be with someone I'm attracted to and that's the part that it's making me confused because if I was really craving it, then all those physical attributes shouldn't matter, right? I should be able to just randomly go to a guy and asking if he's down to it." - No, I can't do that with women. There has to be attraction. Yes I'm (and you) are craving that human connection and probably the intimacy that comes with sex, but doesn't mean you can have it with just anyone.

  • There is no ‘should be able to just randomly hook up with some strange guy’ requirement. Anyone who tells you differently is not only lying to you, but does not have your best interest at heart.

  • get laid. have a pleasure tryst

  • Share with a female friend and take little time. There are scary aspects of first time se which keeps us from approaching any one. An attractive person helps us as we think at least he is good looking or I am attracted to him other thing is a touch history between two people.

    • It's probably same thing, no?

    • I was once told I can be better off without this person. I am just craving a good company and I guess that was the case

  • it's both i think

    • Agreed