Do men care about a woman's orgasm?

[Anonymous]

Of course I know not everyone is the same, so this is why I'm asking; to get opinions from a wider audience.

I'm just sharing what I've experienced.

Most of my sexual experiences were when I was a teenager. I'd find that some of the younger guys loved the idea of making a girl cum, but they were way too excited in the moment and how it felt for them, and so it never really led to me having my orgasm.

I'm 24 now and I've only had 1 sex partner since I was 19. He was okay, he did want to please me, but he didn't really know how to work my clit or anything (even though I would try and show him numerous times) so again, it didn't happen. I kinda just gave up on that and enjoyed the P in V instead.

Is it just a case of most men don't have the effort/ enthusiasm to help a woman reach orgasm during sex? Or is it just not no.1 on the to-do list whilst in the act?

[ohsheeT]

Like you said everybody's different you have the guys

They will say and do anything just to get in that girl's pants to only last 2 minutes just to brag

Then you have the guys who are only last 2 minutes because they got way too excited like you said

Then you have the guys that are quick because they don't believe in themselves and I think they got a small dick and they don't know how to use it

And you're just going to have the selfish guys who only want one thing and that's just to come but they don't care about the girl at all it's all about them

And then you got the guys with the big dick he'll get so excited they blow their wad just because I got a big dick and they don't know how to use it

But everybody's different I mean there's a hundred different other types out there too

What you want to find is the guy that's going to make it all about you he's confident in himself he's confident in his size he's confident and he's confident that he knows how to use it in any circumstance he's also confident in his kiss. He knows where and when to be sensual or passionate with his touch he's confident in everything he does without showing that he's confident he's going to use his energy and his emotions with everything else to make you feel something you could ever felt before. it's just who he is
And he's going to make it all about you

He's the guy that's going to give you foreplay he's going to look deep into your eyes he's going to be able to read the color of your cheeks the way you move the way you moan and he's going to know everything you want in that moment because all those parts are speaking to him without you saying one word

And everything he does to you he's going to become one with you and just take you to a higher level of orgasms he's going to know when to be sensual and he's going to know when to give you that good pounding and he's going to know that you're going to come once twice before he even thinks about it he's going to have his timing down he's not going to be excited until the very end when he's just going to take you into another world

When he touches you he's going to be doing five different other things to you all at the same time and they're all going to come together making you so you don't know which direction you're going

And after you've come he will be finished and for the first 20-25 minutes there won't be any cuddling because you're both going to roll over onto your back and you're going to have one of the best out of body experiences you'll better have

In about 20 minutes later 25 minutes later you'll feel something touching your leg or your back and you don't know what it is and all the sudden you have to fight to open your eyes and once you get your eyes open and you sit up and you look around wondering where you're at you realize you just had one of the best times you've ever had having sex and you realize it was the bed touching your back or your leg LOL and that's when you kind of lay back down and you wait for her to wake up or vice versa and when that happens you either get up and get something to eat or you start all over again

[PositiveFlight]

I certainly care. In fact, there is nothing more beautiful than seeing and knowing a woman is climaxing due to my efforts. It is true that a guy can get caught up in the moment and get overstimulated which is why the following must be adhered to.

1. A guy must come into the situation with a giving mentality. Sex to me is all about displaying love through the ultimate physical connection between a man and woman. That being the case, it requires 100% selflessness, patience, and caring.

2. A guy must learn his own body so he knows the threshold of where his point of no return is so he doesn’t let the stimulation push him over the edge too soon.

3. A guy must be willing to learn the body of his woman by understanding her unique buttons to push and caring enough to learn her female physiology inside/out. Its part of the connecting process of becoming one flesh together.

4. Finally, a guy must be able to assure and show through deed that he can be trusted to be there for her after and hold her. He needs to show her that he isn’t just using her body to get off such as wham bam thank you mamn but that he truly has connected with her. If he can be there for her each time, he will help her remove anxiety or reservations she may have up front which might prevent her form being able to let go mentally so her body can climax.

As a guy reaches middle age such as myself, we reflect more on what truly matters during love making. We learn from our mistakes when we were in our twenties and realize that sex should not be self serving. Womanhood and potential motherhood is beautiful and we learn to respect it way more. We don’t want a woman to have regrets but rather want her to want it more every day because she feels fulfilled, physically, mentally, emotionally, and in every other way happy every time. That’s what intimacy should achieve.

[Eva2000]

BEAUTIFUL ANSWER!

[RoseySarah]

There are men the huge BUT you have to teach them to be good for you!

My lover is so good and I teach him to be better! It is sex and about communication! If he will give the effort then show him what you like and be verbal point and move him to where you want the feeling!

Even if a guy is good for one girl then he is usually just okay or bad for another cause we are all different!

Also the more he brags the worse he is in bed! Also those nice guys omg I'll make you orgasm yeah not so in bed... they just wanna shove it in with 2 seconds of foreplay lmao!

For me is almost all day teasing back and forth! Sexy talk snuggling and higs in public...

Then at night the magic happens and candles go on! Hope your guy gives thought to romance too!

[ushagomez]

I think most guys today understand that they have practice to get it right, so always best to train them well…. lol. Fortunately I have only had 1 really clueless/selfish, the rest have been very keen to please.

[Eva2000]

Same here! Only ONE truly self-absorbed partner whose brain must have been from like 1932. He totally believed that a truly “sexual” woman will be able to cum from what he does (and nothing else should be required). Total fragile male ego. All the rest (y’all - even casual sex encounters, for real), the guy has ALWAYS said, “what do you want? What do you like? What can I do? Can I lick it? Show me how you like it touched / where I should touch / how I should touch” I mean, god bless GUYS. They typically “show up”, ready to be fully present and create pleasure for everyone (or maybe I’ve just been INCREDIBLY LUCKY) But the point is: STAY AWAY FROM ASSHOLES. Most guys aren’t. They can't always control if they “finish” before you but I’ve never had a guy (except that one) not be able to go on until I’ve had enough. FIND A GOOD MAN. BE HORNY before sex (get into the right headspace). Never have “box-checking” obligatory sex.

[ManofHistory]

Well, men grow excited and cum a lot faster than most women do. It would be like if you were about to cum and the guy wanted you to suck his dick, it would probably pull you out of it and would be hard to focus on what he wants.

I wish that mother nature allowed the two genders to be closer in their climax, but oh well. You could always prep yourself before hand or finish yourself off afterwards.

You could also work on getting your guy to give you pleasure before pleasuring himself and "train" him.

[Asad1ONE1]

That's a long outdated myth. Women are no slower or faster to arouse or get off than men are.

[Eva2000]

EXACTLY. Depending on which research you look at: it takes women about 5 - 8 min, similar to most guys. The only thing that “takes so long” girls is her getting over whatever Communication block is happening. AT THE VERY LEAST: SHE CAN FINISH IT HERSELF. I never understood why women who know how to orgasm in their own don’t take care of things if he can’t / won’t / isn’t sure how.

[Eva2000]

See my reply below. Girls don’t take longer. We are often just not in the right headspace (it’s not only the guy who should be super horny and excited ——- why can’t some of us ladies understand that you have to REALLY want it to not notice discomfort or nerves and be able to feel pleasure) —- don’t just do it cause you’re sick of being a virgin or you’re trying h to get your guy off your back — YOU WON’T CUM) We aren’t getting the proper stimulation. *** A clitoris is just a small dick that doesn’t ejaculate.*** THINK ABOUT IT. REALLY THINK ABOUT IT. No clit contact —> no orgasm for like 80-90% of females. You need to be: -Hot -Horny -Ready (mentally as well as physically: you should be ENTHUSIASTIC) - so much desire you want to jump on his dick -Be dripping wet (but STILL bring the lube) -Engage in a range of activities that bring you to the brink -Doesn’t matter who cums first: as long as everyone is happy. For her: end on the clit (manual, oral, toy) -if all else fails, touch and tease her while she shows you, HERSELF, how she “does it”

[Asad1ONE1]

It's not only about the "right headspace". That could involve any man or woman. And guys or girls can have numerous barriers that can keep them from focusing. The clitoris isn't just a "small dick" lol it can be the same size or even larger than a penis! Most of it is hidden under the skin. Women don't masturbate just with the glans alone!

[ManofHistory]

Let me add this real quick: I should've put more emphasis on men getting excited quicker. I know that a woman can cum after about the same amount of time as a guy, but I communicated that poorly and was mainly referring to it being harder to excite a woman and get her going. I appreciate the replies to my comment.

[Asad1ONE1]

@ManofHistory Yes I think this myth is enforced by PIV and the media lol

[Asad1ONE1]

Same with foreplay

[Asad1ONE1]

Same with arousal time

[Constatine]

If she doesn't i have the feeling i failed her. It is not happening often.. sometimes... and i feel bad i had all the fun...

[spartan55]

Of course I do. I consider it my civic duty.

[Apple1996]

I think most guys care about a woman's pleasure

[Billlewis]

Not only do I care about it, her climax is the single most important thing in my life, rivaled only by her boyfriend's climax.

[Rorobb]

I love when my lady gets off, licking her and fingering her, when I feel she’s wet it’s the most incredible feeling, even if I don’t cum , I love it when she has her orgasms

[CatVader]

some do some don't.
I sort of hate being with a woman who got used to acting like she come when she don't. it makes the whole thing fake to me. I get that.. in order to make men believe they did a good job and all.. a woman might think she need to act, but it really isn't doing any favors.
some just have more body insight than others. and that goes for both men and women.
some are just better at body skills; like sex. know how to please and how to enjoy this as well.
I've known some woman who talked, about their guy putting in a ton of effort but just not getting there; usually by overhearing women chatter.

I guess, over time a partner can learn to please, effort isn't enough, you gotta train your mental insight ability as well.

[AviatorTom]

I care, and I know other men who care, and some that are more interested in their own pleasure. We can't generalize.

[Bricealan]

Opinion only. Maybe many men are too anxious to ejaculate, and afterward they lose interest. We , my prior girlfriend and I, worked together, as I really looked forward to having her work her vulva, (clitoris and labia AND anus) in my face, and mouth. It was VERY erotic, and I lived for that. Many men do not.

[patrick994]

I speak for myself, I love to bring a woman to orgasm, especially with oral and masturbation, if I realised I was finishing first, I would devote myself to her completely, I don't like to see her unsatisfied, for obvious reasons, if I have to think only of myself, I might as well just masturbate.

I know different types of men, most seem to attach great importance to pleasing the woman, others seem to think only of themselves.

[Eva2000]

Clone yourself. Save the world.

[patrick994]

@Eva2000 ahaha thank you

[Dargil]

It is my primary focus.

[FunkyMonkee]

I do! I try to make sure she cums, too!

[Fireguy17]

yeppers, when all possible she cums first through however many she can handle.
It was after 6 or 7 my wife turned into a pile of unset jello.
I really like watching a woman have an orgasm.

[exitseven]

Yes, any job worth doing is worth doing well.

[tfan1]

Before my wife hit early menopause - I would lick her clitoris like crazy. I have more pleasure giving her pleasure. Now that she’s on menopause - I still love to give her pleasure - a bullet sized vibrator on her clitoris generating 1-3 orgasms 👍🙂

[stratford]

It's more important to me that she reaches climax that me ejaculating. The best part of intimatacy is giving the other person pleasure.

I'm sorry you haven't had a great experience with this yet - hopefully you will!

[Jersey2]

Try grinding on him and generally using his body to get off. It will likely excite him and you will see more interest from him in getting you off.

[Alex-Snow]

I do. I know girls do not always orgasm from PIV sex. That is what a tongue or vibrator is for. Did you ever orgasm with OIV sex with ur 19 yr old boyfriend? If you went for round 2 or 3 with him did that help?

[Mark987]

100%... for me it's easy to finish... and I always handle her first.

[MissBoogus]

In my relationship, and I’ve just been in one, but I feel like he just didn’t know enough about it. He thought he just needed to fuck and it would happen, some years later and we’ve both learned more and now, he doesn’t really pay attention unless I say I want to. After all it’s not really necessary for me, sex is just as good

[LiamJHayden]

When I am in relationship and it reaches that level, her getting hers first is my #1 priority, as many women just cannot climax during intercourse.

[Sunnybeach123]

One of my biggest turn ons is going down on a woman. I can do it for as long as she likes and it makes me happy to give her pleasure. It's important for a man to be patient and make sure his partner is also getting a lot of pleasure too.

[DextroShade]

Only if they care about the woman.

[Juxtapose]

You sound difficult, women I get with aren't so picky and it's easy to make them cum.

[boobliker]

I know I do!

[Twalli]

I want to make my girlfriend orgasm so much, that I don't care if we even get to the actual sex as long as she gets off and I feel good.

[OddBeMe]

Only if they care for them more than their own orgasm.

[peterrezeeek]

yes i care 100%

[bananathunder]

I do every time. I don't like to cum until I know they are ready for the session to be over

[driven159]

I can't answer for everyone but that is the only reason to make love is to give pleasure to the other person.

[driven159]

and some of that falls on you does the word Communcation a word that is used in a relationship tell him talk to him after all this time you both should know each other completely.

[QuietRunner]

I care and love to watch a woman cum

[jjj101010]

I care, it’s hot to watch a girl orgasm and I like to do that for her

[MasterKS]

without that a sex is failed one!

[riverrat3]

Love watching a woman's face as she orgasms

[negrl4a69]

Fuck yes I do

[Eva2000]

Can I ask:

are you WAITING for PIV-sex (penetrative/“classic” penis in vag sex) to produce an orgasm?

cause even if your male partner last a long time (an hour, 10 hours, whatever), NOT gonna get you off if it’s not the stimulus that normally “does it” for you.

PIV-sex is arousing, appetite-wetting and fulfilling for most females but NOT the “bell-ringer” unless your one of those rare females that can cum from no direct clit stimulation (or if you are part of the 80-90%, then you’ll have to make an effort to stimulate the clit during intercourse if you are hellbent on cumming that way)

is it super important to you that he “makes” you cum and must be from penetration from his penis? Cause that’s a NARROW view of sex and sexual satisfaction

[Anonymous]

I feel bad for the women who their partner doesn’t know or care to help them orgasm too. It’s not just about us cumming! Lol.

[Anonymous]

Some guys are selfish or don’t have the patience, they usually care but don’t know how to get her to climax as fast as it happens to us, it’s best to use oral as foreplay so she doesn’t take as long during intercourse

[Anonymous]

I personally do, that's the priority

I can cum like 10 minutes or so into the session, much easier than her, but if I do so it won't be enjoyable for her

So I always put in effort to restrain it and when I get close to cumming I do oral for her so that she gets close too and I kind of cool down at the same time

Then in missionary style we both orgasm at the same time, once she orgasms, I would let go and within few strokes I would cum too

[Anonymous]

Why do you expect him to work your clit for you. He's already doing all the hard labor. Take some ownership for your own pleasure.