Do men expect sex on the first date?

[lizchill]

[MrOracle]

It depends on which category they have placed you, and if they are even open to being in a real relationship at all.

If a woman is at least moderately attractive physically, she can use her sexuallity to get attention from men, even men far out of her league - but that attention is going to be SEXUAL attention ONLY. Hot, rich, popular guys will bang you (I'm speaking to women in general, not to the Asker specifically), but they won't commit to you. Why? Because those guys can attract the top, 10/10 women, and if anyone is going to get their commitment, it will be one of those top women. Like, for example, Tom Brady marrying supermodel Giselle Bundchen. But this holds true even a bit down the scale - if a guy is a 9, and the girl is a 7, he will bang her, but he's unlikely to commit to her.

The other situation is if a woman has made choices that men find repellent. Let's say there's a guy and a girl who are both a 7 when looks and social popularity are considered. That guy would normally consider giving that girl a commitment - but, if he discovers that she is promiscuous, or a "woke activist" or a cheater or is loud and argumentative, then he's immediately (and permanently) going to downgrade her to "for recreational use only" status. He might still take her on a date, but he's going to expect sex, because that's all he was ever interested in. And in MOST cases, his attitude and behavior will make it quite clear that that's all he wants, and if asked directly, most guys will tell you straight up.

A relationship commitment comes with a high cost and even higher risk for a man - and women have increased both while simultaneously reduced the benefits of a relationship for men, so men are increasingly less willing to offer commitments, and are generally more careful when they do.

They'll still pursue casual sex when they are single, and the bar for that is FAR lower when it comes to standards. Still, a lot of women delude themselves into believing that any male attention (and especially attention from a really desirable guy) is RELATIONSHIP attention, because they don't want to accept the truth: that most of that attention is merely sexual attention, especially when they are trying to date above their own level. That's a dangerous mistake to make as a woman.

It's also important for women to remember that the things that give men value - education, career, income - give that value because that's what women want from a man. But that's NOT what men want from a woman - what men value in a woman is youth, purity, fertility, femininity, cooperation, and peacefulness. Your degree, your career, and your income are largely irrelevant to us, so if you want the best options in men, then focus on being what men want, rather than in BECOMING the man you'd want to date.

[Pixel343]

What everyone should remember is that men are wired this way. We did not choose to have such a sex driven mind. Personally I think it's terrible. I wish my mind worked differently. But it doesn't. So drop them panties prudes!

[MrOracle]

The issue is that women need to decide which path they are going to take: is she going to follow the serious relationship path, or the casual sex path. Much like the dark side, once you start down the casual sex path, forever will it dominate your destiny. If you've slept around, men will find out (most men can tell just by the way a woman carries herself - even if she's a stranger), and you will instantly be grouped in the "for recreational use only" category - and once you have that label, you won't be able to get rid of it, and the men you'll be able to get a commitment from will usually be men who don't take commitments seriously, or men who are considered low value by most people. If you want a commitment from a reasonably high-value man, you're going to need to decide that very early on and pursue that when you are young and pure. Again, just because you can get sexual attention from men does not mean you can get a commitment, and you aren't likely to get one if you don't have high value to offer in return.

[ObscuredBeyond]

If she's a woke activist, I keep my multitools handy, in case she goes full Antifa and tries to start a riot. In which case, I brace for impact, and pray that whatever happens next doesn't have to end in violence.

[Inbox]

@ObscuredBeyond If she's "woke" I go to sleep.

[ObscuredBeyond]

@Inbox : I can't decide if Wokeism or crack is more dangerous. Tends to make folks equally irrational, unhinged, and unpredictable. If they have pink hair and 15 nose rings, they're probably at some point going to get triggered by something no normal human being would even notice, and start acting like they're on bath salts. I've seen enough PJW videos to know I'd rather be locked in a room with an old lady high who's on Xanax, than be anywhere near a Portland Starbucks chick.

[Inbox]

@ObscuredBeyond Yeah lol. If you take a step back, a macro one, and study the rise and fall of empires, my opinion is that all empires fall due to excess. All these extreme movements, such as “woke”, are just signs of excess simply because things are too secure in our country (not financially numbers wise, but too much of the want to keep holding the hands of everyone). When movements begin over minor things, odds are they have nothing else better to do. Moreover, it’s a systematic problem. Have you every seen the first Harry Potter film? If so, I’m the beginning of film you have Harry’s fat cousin Dudley freak out over getting 36 presents instead of 38 since he got 37 the year before his bday - Harry looks at him with the biggest WTF face and was so appreciative of a mere cake from a stranger (Hagrid). America and the West in general is showing many symptoms of excess, like a fat boy named Dudley 😂

[ObscuredBeyond]

@Inbox : It even happens to nations that don't have an excess. When the governing halls of the philosophers and theologians is taken over by hacks, and the new guard is too weak to prevent such usurpation, envy and weakness wreak their vengeance on society. The moral core doesn't simply corrode; it's assassinated. The nation then loses its last moral principles, and finds itself in moral freefall. Destruction becomes its lot, regardless of whether or not it was ever prosperous. Granted, excess and the decadence that can come with it do tend to exacerbate these forces. But it's symptomatic / catalystic, not intrinsic.

[Keyboardkat]

As a guy who has been around the block a number of times, my opinion is, my gosh, NO! I HOPE NOT! Sex is supposed to MEAN SOMETHING! Even a kiss is supposed to MEAN SOMETHING! I may be old fashioned, but I think there was a lot to be said for the old social rules. Love needs to come first. Emotion needs to come first. You don't just la-di-da jump into bed with someone on the first date. If the person is really worth dating, worth knowing, worth having a relationship with, then they are worth waiting for! Otherwise, you're just using another person's body as a masturbation machine, and I think that's 100 percent wrong! This is why I am so opposed to this stupid "Friends with Benefits" garbage! We are emotional beings, like it or not, and it's often very difficult to separate emotions from sex, especially for women! People can get badly hurt and depressed, because one can get emotionally involved without intending to and if the other person doesn't feel the same way and says, "I never wanted an involvement," where does that leave you? Save it for the one you want to spend your life with. Save it for your husband or wife is good advice, even if it's not cool or not current!

[Anonymous]

Iya so wrong to have sex on 1st date fuck even 3es date.
1st of all you don’t even know who’s this person is their true identity they might be child molester killers thief , their medical issues if they have some disease they know they have it and spread it to you , their mental statues they might be a maniac what if they follow you or stalk you..
if you truly respect your self as a human being have some dignity even female dogs bark at their male dogs first before before they mate to show them their strength. They don’t give in right away.
I’m not blaming women both men and women how can you be so trash to have sex 1st day of meeting someone. Do you realize how sick this is… it’s not about virginity at ALL I’m not talking about people not have sex but 1st day of meeting someone? Wow you must belong to the shit kingdom because as I said even animal kingdom doesn’t give in right away… I’m even ashamed of my species.

[Beatrix7]

i would rather go for lunch a few times and get to know each other more first because i have made that mistake with my ex talkimg to him on the phone never meeting for dinner or lunch but i was invited to his house and we fkt each other on the first night at his house thats a huge mistake get to know the person first before you jump in

[Pixel343]

How did you enter a relationship?

[Beatrix7]

meeting on a dating site but we never went to lunch a few times he just invited me to his mums house where he lives and he asked me to sleep with him i couldnt resist and i said yes

[Beatrix7]

who ever disagreed has no brains because fucking on the first date before knowing each other is the worst mistake ever

[SteveSmith1985]

Nope. They may be half-hoping for it. But certainly they don't expect it. My advice would be to not have sex with him on the first date. It tends to reflect unfavorably on you overall to tell you the truth. Not a huge deal, but in general, you might want to wait at least until after the first date.

[Breanna_nonbinary]

Men hope for sex on the first date unless the girl is an escort in which case then it’s expected.

[Sunssong]

Some*

[ObscuredBeyond]

I'd only be insulted if she started acting begrudgingly about it. Especially if I correct her, and she still acts bitter.

[meetkitty123]

Oh God no. And I would certainly not to want to date a guy that does!

[Guy13]

Of course we go as a guy with a penis. It doesn’t mean we will want to marry or reflect them, or date them. We are never insulted by it but sometimes can be disappointed

[Bethany22]

No they don't. In fact many men are insulted by women who assume that they need to pay the guy back for the meal he pays for through sex, let alone sex on the first date.

[WanderingLoveWizard]

I wouldn't be insulted, but I know what you mean

[TenderFantasy]

It doesn't matter what they expect, it is up to YOU what you want to do with YOUR body! Don't let anyone tell you otherwise!

[MrNameless]

Nope. I don't think most men expect/feel entitled to sex on the first date. A lot might hope for it, but won't bring it up, because they know better, unless they met on tinder and her profile said she's looking for something casual. Also, a lot of men do have standards and don't believe in sex on the first date if they're looking for a serious relationship.

I usually don't feel horny on the first date. It's very much a mindset, but it can change if a woman wears something sexy, which they never had for me on a first date.

[weysally]

I think they hope for sex on the first date, and I think quite a few girls do as well,

[OlderAndWiser]

I'm sure that some guys expect it, and even more guys hope for it, but most of us don't expect it.

[TheorionMage]

MUCH depends upon the particular man~ ;)

[Quackthulu2]

Often times, sure. But to be fair so do a lot of girls. But just because somebody expects or wants something doesn’t mean they get to have it.

[RobT312]

I wouldn’t expect it, but if there was good chemistry I’d at least try

[EmyyWolf]

In today’s age. Yes, because other women has given him easy access. Specially if he’s attractive.

If he’s not attractive or appealing; no.

[red324]

I prefer a few dates, but they lose interest before then.

[Backwood1988]

Well what do look for in male and what kind of body and size does he have and what do you think about my pictures

[MrCommodore]

Honestly no, not at all.

[lightbulb27]

no, I expect to figure out if I enjoy being with them, at least somewhat.

[ObscuredBeyond]

I don't expect sex on a first date, or even a third. But if things get out of hand and it happens by the fourth, and I've been with her that long, it may be seriously time to start discussing marriage.

[serious]

No. I am sure.

[OatmealMuffin]

If they meet on Tinder, they do.

[mysteryatdark]

in my experience yes but I don't date men too often, mostly for that reason

[coachTanthony]

Yes but only if it's going to be good. fooling around is for HS.

[Pixel343]

ahh, high school