Do submissive and effeminate heterosexual males exist?

I'm just curious, i want to know what other people like because im afraid im doing life wrong since my preferences are a lot more niche as a heterosexual female. I'm into guys who take on more of a submissive and feminine role, i've been into that for as long as i remember. I've always liked more feminine and sensitive guys since i was little, I myself am quite feminine and I think I enjoy the vulnerability and the passion of males in general.

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Superb Opinion

  • It's definitely not a niche to want that. Women call guys incels, losers, manboy, because they want a guy who acts stupid, lazy and incompetent. And yes, there are tons of submissive guys who are cuckolds and want a woman to dominate them it's just they get made fun of for being submissive, so pretend to masculine or assertive when they get a girlfriend, but if they the man starts acting lazy or incompetent the woman will feel more powerful and taking over the relationship. It's just the guy has to pretend he is dumb, but that is hard for him to do because he might be afraid you will leave him if you start thinking he is useless. At least this what I have heard I don't have any interest in dominate women, but I know a lot of guys that do and a lot of women want a submissive male.

    You are struggling to find it because most guys don't feel comfortable telling everyone they are into that because they don't want to be made fun of by everyone. Being a dominate woman or being submissive and it doesn't really as much of a stigma as being a effeminate or weak heterosexual male. The only ones who are very vocal are usually submissive men who make their whole identity their fetish and just end pictures in their fetish suit all over the internet and make the ones who have good social skills and human decency look bad.

    It's like that in every group you are always going to have people that make you look bad so they don't want to associate with the label "Submissive" male. It's out there most of the ones with a good reputation and good social skills will never admit they are like that because they don't want to ruin their relationships with others.

    • i personally think that wanting a submissive male is a more niche preference, most women like dominance (even tho that’s not for me lol), but i still agree with what you’re saying here. i honestly think that the idea of an ‘alpha male’ is so dumb; it’s just another excuse for men to act like cavemen and be super entitled and aggressive, which is something we need less of in the world And yeah there are plenty of submissive guys that try to act ‘alpha’ because they don’t think women will like them otherwise, which sucks. you make a great point, it’s something that people are more vocal about when they make their whole identity about it. and yeah, i’ve also had to cut out so many internet communities because some of the people there were super toxic and rude. like, imagine being mean to someone just because they’re a feminine man… how immature and insecure do you have to be 🙄 and yeah some of them also have some really weird fetish suit stuff too, but even then i feel like some people take it too far when attacking them for it. yeah it sucks that they’re forced to hide a part of themselves because they’re scared of the possible repercussions. and yeah like there are tons of people who are just into being submissive because they like it like that, not because they’re trying to escape reality, and i feel like that’s where the toxic ones come in; the ones who just want to wallow in self-pity and delusion, which only causes more stigma to be shoved onto the ones who aren’t toxic and are just trying to be happy with how they live.

    • I've been with women who are more on the dominant side. They usually act passive or pretend they are dumb when you talk to them. But I am a nice guy, so when they are around me they feel more comfortable being the way they are around me, so they want put in a submissive role. Like when I was a boy had girl used like to drag me around or pull me by hand. She drag me by my foot or pull me by my hand and drag me down the stairs. She would bring me food and try to feed it to me. And someone was trying to hit me she take the hit for me. I meet women like that at work and stuff and they like to pursue me when they I am nice. Again I am not into that, but I am empathic to others feelings even they do a few bad things I don't write them off as a bad person. I am just not into those types of relationships because I feel like I am just a pet or something. It's just more like they don't feel comfortable acting like that because they are afraid of guys not liking them. And women are just afraid of being talkative because they are told to be shy and submit.

Most Helpful Guy

  • Look you do it the way that you want to do it because that's what makes you happy what you have to understand is the guy that you're looking for because a lot deeper than that too there are those same exact guys and add that passion that sensual touch that sensitive like empath side of them. People that feel energy and emotion but at the same time our a man's man that are badass... They can build anything fix anything... And create things and have those rough calloused hands but like I said there's a time and a place for everything. So they are out there I don't know that a lot of them might show that side for me I don't care I know exactly who I am and I'm going to be who I'm going to be.

    • Yes, Sir, but if I may render my position on this subject, even when they display the more masculine side of their personality, they still won't approach the stature of a true, no-doubt-about-it badass, like you. Not trying to be facetious, but that is my honest opinion.

Most Helpful Girl

  • yea but they're not that common. and also a lot of them are bi

    • yes, i know being bi is still stigmatized too (i am actually bisexual myself and my mother doesn’t accept it), so that probably factors into it too

    • How do u know all this

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What Girls & Guys Said

0 16
  • Sure. I doubt there are particularly many, unless you're looser about what constitutes "submissive and effeminate", though. Also on the extent; there are likely a lot more willing to indulge, or even enjoy, than would admit it publicly- so long as it's behind closed doors. Loss of status can be very harsh.

    • you’re definitely right that most guys would be hesitant to publicly admit that they are submissive and effeminate; society tends to view those traits as being “unmanly” or “soy” which obviously isn’t the case but those beliefs and stereotypes are still prevalent unfortunately.

  • probably yes, but rare.

  • I think they do but I can't help you :)

  • I would say I am one. Because I am both. And of course they exist. Nothing wrong with that preference at all, just gotta find them.

    • thank you, I've felt wrong with my preferences for my whole life because im into guys who are more feminine than me. my ex really gave me a hard time about it, calling me gay and stuff because i liked taking more of a dominant role in our relationship, and i felt disgusting for liking what i liked. but now i’m not ashamed anymore about it. i still get a little sad whenever i see a feminine guy get called gay because they’re still stigmatized but im learning to be proud of my preferences and to love myself regardless of what other people think.

    • People always stigmatize what's different but there is nothing wrong it. Plenty are just straight, some are Bi, but you can for sure find a man that's into you that's sub and not masculine. I've always been more sub and always known women are what I find hot.

    • that’s great that you’ve always had confidence in your sexuality, i was really insecure for a while and i hid it for the longest time and you’re right, i’m sure there are plenty of submissive men, and i have found a few of them on the internet. i just hope that my preferences are accepted by who i fall in love with

    • Show All
  • Lispers, prancers and hand-lifters? Sure. It's how they advertise for a mate. Like Marty Gilbert (who really is gay in real life) in Independence Day or Willem Dafoe's Paul Smecker character, (who isn't) in Boondock Saints.

    • what an awful way to refer to feminine men :’( you can't convince me that those guys in the movies are just playing a character, they’re literally just acting like themselves lmao at this point im starting to think that ur just a self-hating feminine man or an angry little man with a fragile masculinity lol

    • You can't convince me that those guys in the movies are just playing a character, they’re literally just acting like themselves lmao *Your mind is made up. I won't try to. I can tell when someone's mind is closed. It's a defense mechanism, like Trump Derangement Syndrome. (A) t this point (I'm) starting to think that (you are) just a self-hating feminine man or an angry little man with a fragile masculinity lol *And why, exactly, would you think that? I think I just have a good command over the obvious. It's kind of threatening when some thinks and speaks plainly.

  • If most wives are argumentative and controlling of their husbands, then why is being submissive seem as "feminine" 🤔

    • seen*

  • Sounds great! I wish you luck on your search!

  • They 100% exist. There's a reason why Timothy chalamet and Tom Holland and the weird tall guy from euphoria are so popular. It's modern feminism favoring emasculated men

  • Effeminate yes. Submissive not so much. I used to know a guy you would swear was gay if you hadn't met his girlfriend.

  • Yes there are of course

  • I'm sure they exist, they just choose to stay on the downlow to avoid society's judgment.

    • yeah, and i think that’s fair honestly, life is tough enough without being judged just for who you are. like people can’t choose who they’re attracted to so why should it matter to anyone else lmao

    • Well I'm gonna disagree with you on one thing and agree on another 🙂 I agree that people should be left alone and no one has the right to judge anyone else But I disagree on the attraction thing, I'm of the belief that we can choose who are we attracted to, that's just my opinion 🙂

  • Short answer to this. I chose that because i might be one😅 would u mind dm me... in my country people dont accept that too...

  • I am super submissive

  • Of course submissive guys exists. I think most have a small wiener...

  • They exist, but there are very few men who would be happy being submissive to a woman. It goes against most men's nature.

    • yeah that’s true, most men have been conditioned to be leaders and protectors so being submissive would contradict that also it doesn’t really help that men who are more comfortable letting their partner take the lead get called gay, or that men who are more comfortable showing their emotions are called too girly, so it makes it almost impossible for men to feel accepted by society if they don’t fit the exact definition of masculinity and it sucks because those qualities are also things that people should strive to improve on; people shouldn’t be judged if they cry a bit more or are more submissive.

    • Couple of things. First, "conditining" is not the primary reason why men are naturally more dominant that women; thousands of years of evolution is. Second, men who behave like women are not desired by most women. You are an exception to that rule, and that's fine. But it's a fact.

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