I will answer this question in a way that will make you make your own conclusion.
There is no such a day that I don't fantasize about love. It is extremely pleasurable to me to dream about love and marriage. In all my wild fantasies it is only one and the same man. When I love I will love very hard because it is who I am. I already have those values that make me glorify straight monogamy.
Now that you read all this, do you think I'm a woman who approves of casual sex?
I suppose that a woman could "approve" of casual sex but never actually engage in it, but I know what you meant was: can a woman who has casual sex love a man as much as a woman who waits for the one right man?
Well, there have been studies on this, so overall, we know the answer. About 1500 women were involved in a study, of which they eventually got about 1100 results. These women had between 0 and many previous partners when they got married, and after 10 years, they were followed up with to see who was still happy in their marriage.
Women who were virgins when they got married were still happy with their marriage after 10 years at a rate of 80%, and as their prior partner count climbed, their chances of being happy after 10 years declined significantly, to the point where only 30% of women with 8 previous partners were happy after 10 years. The biggest drops occurred between 0 and 3 partners - at 3 partners, it was already at the 50% mark.
I think we're a year away from another such study being completed, which was started 5 years after the first one, so we should get more data soon, but this shows how significantly partner count is for the ability to pair-bond. This primarily affects women, but does also affect men to a lesser degree. A guy who has slept with 200 women is not going to be able to pair bond with a woman like a guy who slept with 3 women.
This topic is NOT popular, especially among women, because it goes against the narrative that women can have all the casual sex they like and it isn't a problem - but there ARE consequences to casual sex, and virtually all women who have casual sex suffer those consequences - they just refuse to link the cause to the effect, because they don't want it to be true.
I disapprove of casual sex because I value monogamy and love very much. The level of my disgust for casual sex is linked to the level of my glorification of monogamy.
That's a reflection of your morals and values - you couldn't have one without the other and be consistent with your morals. I applaud you - your parents raised you right.
Thank you. Yes I learned what I witnessed and that shaped my morals. And I totally agree that my views on casual sex and monogamy come from my values and morals.
If by "the same way" you mean exactly the same way, then no, or course not. Nobody can love someone exactly the same way that somebody else can. Everyones personal views and perspective make their love unique.
If by "the same way" you mean "the same amount" or "with the same intensity," then yes, of course. Love is something you feel and do, not something you hold and give. You can't run out of it, and you can't save it up. That's just not how it works. It has to go somewhere (not always romance, but somewhere) or it will just disappear.
The same way like I described
I can't tell based on what you described, so that's why I gave both my potential responses. You love hard because of who you are, as you said, not because you are waiting until marriage. Who you are makes your love unique, not whether or not you approve of casual sex.
But it is who I am that makes me find casual sex gross? My glorification of love and disgust for casual sex are linked to each other.
I don’t think previous sexual partners affects how you feel about your current one that much. I’d rather be with somebody who has the capacity to date people before me than to date someone with no experience
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What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!Yes. I do. I even think there may be some value to a woman who has some experience in the world making a conscious choice to pick one man. She knows what else is out there and is making a choice from an informed position. I also have nothing but respect for one who holds themselves out for marriage too. This is a commendable act and a true sign of self control and commitment to a belief & value system.
Nope
Yes both can love equally
I believe that after jumping from D to D a woman has lost the ability to bond to a man.
Yes, absolutely, because love and sex are two completely different things. If I were a virgin, and I married a woman who had been intimate with numerous men before we got married, I wouldn't love her any less for it, and that would still be true even if I weren't a cuckold.
Yes I dont believe being comftble with casual sex or saving yourself for sex effects your actual ability to fall in love or love when u find someone u are willing to love especially if sex is not the baises of love itself
Have you read my opinion?
Yes I did
Do you think a woman who approves of casual sex feeps disgust for casual sex because it contradicts monogamy?
I think people that have had casual sex won't actually be able to love someone for real. They may say they do, just like many people say they do, but they actually don't.
I think it also applies to men too. Men that have causal sex will never be able to love a woman the way someone can that has never had casual sex.
Your two questions are contradictory. Yes, to the main question... it is definitely possible for a woman who enjoys casual sex to love a man. Perhaps she settles down with one man after casual sex when younger. No to the second question... I do not think you approve of casual sex, at least not for yourself. That's fine, please don't try to force your ideals on others.
I meant can a woman who approves of casual sex love a man like I described?
My answer is Yes.. per my personal experience.
Like she regrets her past?
Pretty substantial stats say the women who have had just one other partner prior to marriage are not as happy with their marriage. So if you take female happiness as a proxy for love the answer has to be NO.
The stats are statistically significant. The same effect is not observed in men. Of course statistics are about populations so it isn't about individuals - it is just the probability is low.
I'm not a woman, and I never will be a woman. But as a man, I can tell you after sleeping with over 200 women, I will never love again like I would have loved when I had only a few partners. Don't get me wrong, I'm definitely a better lay now for women, and they appreciate the sex more, but the romance will probably never be what it was. I wish I was wrong, I wish I could tell you that after all the sex I've had I can find a legitimate true love, but it just doesn't seem to be the case. Logic overrules that.
Sex has become a very ordinary thing. Like you can't lust too intensely after a woman. Did I get it right?
Completely wrong, I can easily lust... Can't easily love.
Can you describe your lust?
It's very difficult to say that someone who approves of mutually using someone else can simultaneously truly love someone. Once you know what casual sex really is and what love really is, they are completely incompatible. And therefore to hold them both would at best make you a hypocrite. But it's not a cognitively functional or morally coherent system.
So no. I don't think either is reasonable or possible.
Casual sex and loving deeply are NOT mutually exclusive. One could have / enjoy BOTH at different points in your life. No dichotomy here!
Not the way I can. Read my description.
Still yes.
I think you can have those beliefs and still have casual sex. You're just looking for the right one to end up with, and at the same time you can enjoy casual sex there is nothing wrong with that.
A womqn can have those beliefs and sleep around? What do you mean by "those" beliefs? What I described?
Usually the more meaningless sex is to people, the more likely they are to cheat. They fuck like shaking hands, way too casually.
Yes and that kills the hotness and sensuality
Well, some men historically wed prostitutes because of their greater and varied sexual experience. I think some formerly promiscuous women can be monogamous, but I'd have to think long and hard before considering an EXTREMELY randy woman a potential partner.
But they are numb to intimacy. It is no longer special.
Yes, and perhaps even without casual sex.(The men, that is.)
Definitely not
I don't think you approve of casual sex
I feel disgust for it
You are right. You cannot love like a single partner.
Alright fall in love with one man only for casual sex by marrying but keep up your promise and your trust.
If I had a hoe mindset I wouldn't fantasize only one man and I wouldn't find the idea of casual sex gross.
Really? 🙄
You think hoes feel disgust for casual sex?
yepper
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