Do you think there’s a sexual element to domestic violence?

[wittymilf]

Like abusers are getting off sexually on the power.

[mstbooblover]

Probably the domestic violence is a symptom of a deep feeling of insecurity. I'm not convinced this to be necessaryly sexual, and if it still is, then sex becomes rather a way to dominate for the culprit to prove his victim and himself who's the strong one. Still a proof of insecurity.

A friend of mine, a nice woman, told me one day about how wrong things went at home with her parents. One of her sisters had to undergo violence during whole her childhood. The result was that later in her life the sister only understood the language of violence, in words and deeds. She finally committed suicide.

Once I was at the place of a friend's friends. That household was a bit strange although at first sight the children seemed normal. Very quickly the man showed how abusive and violent he was with his wife. One could consider this a spontaneous BDSM relation. I asked the woman how she could stand that mostly verbal and sometimes physical violence, and she answered: "I prefer to get beaten than undergoing indifference...".

As you see the subject is very complex.

[MrCommodore]

Not sure if its sexual in terms of arousal from it etc, but perhaps sexual in that its the opposite sex who usually gets abused in many cases.

I suspect its definitely driven by an insecurity/fear or perhaps a childhood trauma where they witnessed domestic violence growing up and it is viewed as acceptable in their distorted mind. It's horrific and more needs to be done to understand its origins and how to deal with it.

P. S. Nice new profile picture @wittymilf 😉

[weysally]

maybe, I have known where a guy goes out, and just starts a fight, almost like I will hit on your girl if you don't like it then we fight, I know this is away from domestic violence, but that could also be down to sexual frustration, just giving a different view to things

[Bethany22]

No, it's just someone around that's convenient to abuse. Close partners allows the abuser to know how to push the other's buttons, because they know what their vulnerabilities are.

[Berethor]

If they are sadist then maybe, but believe that it mainly about showing their power.

[normalice]

No. It is 100% just making themselves feel better by trying to force a situation to stop demanding their attention.

[wittymilf]

This can’t be the same for abuser who control there patners socialninteractions and follow them where ever they go though?

[normalice]

It certainly can be. People who don't want to give attention away usually have a specific type of attention that they do want to give away. And if they have found a willing recipient, or especially an eager one, they can easily make themselves believe they should corral that person from wanting any other sort of attention with force. Naturally, that would also extend to the threat of her wanting the same attention but from other people.

[Robbey]

There’s absolutely nothing sexual about domestic violence.

[Bluemax]

For some, yes. For most, no.

[Bricealan]

Could be. Only had one experience in getting involved in breaking up a physical abuse instance. Scary. Police later told me not to get involved, and she will be right back 'UNDER him the next night.

[wittymilf]

I does seem to happen that way, you can see why people give up helping

[Bricealan]

My wife was Furious when I told her about it when I got home. Interesting in that after the incident, another couple stopped, and said what I did was great, and offered me a ride and phoned the police (I had no cell phone) I felt they should have stopped too and her husband should have helped me with this asshole. No such luck

[leighbee]

I think so yeah. My boyfriend does this to me

[bananathunder]

time to leave... go get help

[leighbee]

Easier said then done 😂

[bananathunder]

i guess... good luck though

[wittymilf]

It is definitely hard to leave, sas not to though as there is better options for you,

[Smoothing]

No there is not. It is a power thing. The people that engage in domestic violence usually have a lack of self worth. They pathetically feel like something when they abuse someone. Usually it us someone they think is better than them so they have to put them down and make them feel like shit.

[Steamnir]

Yes they do

[exitseven]

No, it is about control. Domestic violence is not cool and it is not sexual.

[DavidRaul]

No i don't think so. They just like suppressing the other person and feel like they have the authority over them

[Andres77]

In the USA domestic violence is usually assault, not sexual in nature.

[douride2]

in my opinion it is more about power & control over the other person.

[genericname85]

well sadism is a thing... and sadism without consent would be the same in essence as domesitc violence with sex.

[Fukaroo]

Probably not

[loveslongnails]

Have you ever heard the saying "Everything is about sex, except sex. Sex is about power"? If you believe that, there's an argument that can be made saying domestic violence is about sexual inadequacies, as well as violent tendencies.

[collie22]

Satan has so many fiery darts to fling at us that's just one of them

[Guardian45]

Pardone?

[Staximus]

No, they are just pieces of shit

[HillmanZ]

I doubt it,

[BJP21]

If rape is involved YES. Typically NO.

[motownplayer2000]

No. It’s probably just pure power they love. Doesn’t need to be sexual.. now if it’s sexual assault and domestic violence than yes, probably. But I dont think they usually will work in tandem.