Does doing oral sex mean you lose your virginity, or is Oral sex is oral sex, NOT sex?

[Anonymous]

[zzzondarrr]

I think the dilemmas like this perfectly prove how ill defined term "virginity" is...
What actually matters by the meaning of virginity is person's INNOCENCE, and that's not something you either have or don't have, it's like a SCALE, you can be anywhere in between being completely innocent, which might be like babies, or maybe even they aren't there, and completely not innocent, which is a non-defined extreme none can ever reach (luckily)... And we're are all somewhere in between (like numbers on a real positive semi-axis, if you understand it mathematically), and every sexual act, especially if wrong, for example one night stand or friends-with-benefits relationship, but on the other hand I think that leaving a loving relationship can leave even bigger scars on persons heart, all those things shifts us away from being innocent to be less innocent. And once we shift down the scale, there is no coming back up...
And I see virginity as a measure of innocence, what does it matter if a person had an oral sex with 10+ different people, and an anal sex with also as much people, but never had a vaginal sex, does it really make sense for such a person to be considered more a virgin than for example someone who was just once raped, but never was in a relationship or never even kissed anyone? Or is that raped person less virgin than the one who had 10+ relationships already?
I don't know, for me virginity if defined only as not yet engaged in penetrative sex, means actually very little. What matters to me is simply innocence, the purity of heart, and that's often something so entirely different...
I know that we as human species seek for simple definitions for complex things, to make our lives easier to comprehend, but simple definitions on some factually complicated stuff can just so rarely be considered good enough to serve their purpose reliably, especially on stuff regarding our very nature and behavior (like everything in psychology, hence I consider psychology anything but a science), and they most often spread such confusion, and the term "virginity" is a perfect example of that...

[Asker]

innocence = naive

[zzzondarrr]

Not really, innocence does not imply the lack of knowledge. It just means having a pure heart, being the way we as humans are meant to be... And also I wouldn't say you lose your innocence when having sexual activities with anyone, you only lose it if it's not with your true love, with whom you'll stay forever together... And take this for example: there is a guy who killed a person for some selfish reasons, and eventually he learned the hard way that's wrong, and he lost his innocence. On the other hand, you have a guy who was EDUCATED how killing is wrong, he got the same knowledge as the first guy, but he still has his innocence.

[Asker]

So if a girl has sex (anal and everything) with guy she loves (true love) and then he dies. You think she is still innocent and virgin?

[Ironic_Pepe]

Yes she is still innocent and a virgin, according to @zzzondarrr

[Asker]

Really?

[zzzondarrr]

@Asker What, do you want to kill your boyfriend so you can remain innocent and virgin? :D I don't really know what if he dies... If you had sex you aren't a virgin for sure, but if your relationship was all as it should be, if you were married and really so much in love to start having sex, and then he dies, I guess that your virginity and innocence would then be of the least concern for you then... But I think that all sexual experiences take away your innocence, it's just that some take away much more than the others...

[OlderAndWiser]

Tell me what definition you use for virgin and I can answer the question for you.

My definition of virginity involves inexperience and innocence, so. . . no, you can't be a blow job girl and be a virgin in my world.

[Asker]

so someone that gives a handjob is not a virgin?

[Ironic_Pepe]

Yes, handjobs mean a loss of virginity. @OlderAndWiser agrees.

[OlderAndWiser]

What is your definition of "virgin?"

[Asker]

My definition of virginity involves inexperience and innocence, so. . . giving a handjob is loss of virginity.

[OlderAndWiser]

I agree!

[Asker]

Even watching porn is a loss of virginity.

[Ironic_Pepe]

Yes! Watching porn is a loss of virginity! virginity involves inexperience and innocence!!! when will you understand that!

[Sabretooth]

@Ironic_Pepe I wouldn't put porn in the same category-I mean I acknowledge it's not heathy-but unless you're having sex with another-I don't see how it counts as loosing on's virginity

[tinyclit]

In my opinion oral sex, cock sucking and cum swallowing is every bit as much sex as is sexual intercourse. I do and thoroughly enjoy oral sex and have no need or desire for sexual intercourse. If you enjoy oral sex, please don't feel pressured into thinking you're missing anything or that supposed to be doing sexual intercourse, because that's a lie. Oral sex is better, always has been and always will be. :)

[Asker]

So you lose your virginity if you give oral sex?

[tinyclit]

@Asker In my opinion yes. If like me oral sex is what you do, then that's "sex" for you. :)

[Asker]

what about a handjob?

[tinyclit]

Only if he cums into your mouth and you enjoy swallowing his cum.

[Asker]

So if he cums on my face it is not sex, but if in my mouth it is?

[Asker]

If I don't enjoy swallowing it is not sex?

[tinyclit]

Hey, it's just my opinion. If you don't like it, then please feel free to ignore it. It's up to you, not me.

[Asker]

Yes, I want to know your opinion. So if he cums on my face it is not sex, but if in my mouth it is? If I don't enjoy swallowing it is not sex?

[Markella95]

And if I have never been with a man.

[RJGraveyTrain]

To me, losing your virginity means having sex, penetrative or however you have sex. Having oral sex means you're sexually active, yes, but are for all intents and purposes a "technical virgin."

[Markella95]

To me it does cause As someone who never been with a man. To some I be considered to be virgin I’ve had a dildo used on me.

[ZjJaja]

vaginal intercourse is what it means... to bust the cherry and bleed all over the place

[princess_jenna]

It's a form of sex it's just not penetration

[pizzalovershouse]

I agree it's not penetration

[huckleberryhound]

It's considered a sexual act, as is just about any form of physical contact, penetration doesn't even need be involved. But it doesn't mean you lose your virginity in the original sense of the word.

[VatsalRV]

Oral sex can't be considered for losing Virginity it is more like foreplay to increase the excitement

[slatyb]

Virginity is not a real thing anymore. It doesn't matter.

[Rafeal]

Oral is the best Feeling but sadly it's not accounted as losing virginity

[Asker]

not according to most people here lol

[20yearsolder]

Oral sex is not losing your virginity. Usually having your hymen broken is losing your virginity.

[20yearsolder]

What are you confused about?

[Asker]

A lot of people here say oral sex is losing virginity

[20yearsolder]

Some people are wrong, unless you have a penis in your vagina, you are still a virgin

[Asker]

so I can have it in my ass and mouth and still be a virgin?

[20yearsolder]

Technically yes

[20yearsolder]

That's why a lot of girls do anal, so their hymen is still intact and they have their virginity

[HarleyLuv]

Oral is a sex act, but it doesn't count as losing your virginity.

[TheUglyMonk]

Virgin = someone who has never engaged in any sort of sexual act before.

[pizzalovershouse]

@TheUglyMonk you have it right no jobs if any sex

[pizzalovershouse]

so the ugly monk has it right

[scooogy]

@HarleyLuv fair enough

[jakeiremonger]

Any hole. An Asian could shove it up your nostril and your virginity would be out the window.

[Cricket74]

o·ral sex
ˈôrəl, ˈōrəl seks/
noun
sexual activity in which the genitals of one partner are stimulated by the mouth of the other; fellatio or cunnilingus.
sex·u·al in·ter·course
ˈsekSH (o͞o) əl ˈin (t) ərˌkôrs/Submit
noun
sexual contact between individuals involving penetration, especially the insertion of a man's erect penis into a woman's vagina, typically culminating in orgasm and the ejaculation of semen. sex·u·al in·ter·course
So. OK. If oral sex means you loose your virginity then IF you've had penetrative masturbation you loose it also. In my book and according to the definitions above if you haven't been penetrated by a penis your still a virgin. Now things get complicated when you toss in anal sex. Are you still a virgin if all you've had is anal sex? Broadly yes. That's just my opinion. As stated before virginity could mean innocence. And that can be lost through masturbation, oral sex, and anal sex.

[Intraluminal]

It depends on who you ask. Congress evidently feels that it is sex.

[Asker]

I am asking you :)

[Intraluminal]

Kinda sorta sex.

[Intraluminal]

You have to remember that virginity, as a concept, is very old, and originated in societies we're a girl would be married by no later than 18 and more commonly 15. Girls lived at home with thier extended family and due to nutritional problems usually didn't have thier first period until they were 14 or so. Basically, they were (working) children until they hot puberty, and shortly thereafter they were married off through whatever tradition the tribe had. Basically you just had to make sure she didn't have sex with her extended family as a child, and then you watched her closely for a couple of years and your virgin was no longer your problem. Nowadays, girls have their periods as early as 10 years old, they have a great deal of autonomy, and start going out alone usually when their 15. They are then expected to attend school at least until age 1i and often until 22. So, you are expecting them to go without sex (despite being "sex ready") from age 10 to age 22, or 12 years.

[Intraluminal]

The idea of virginity was never intended to address this ridiculously long time period. It was supposed to encompass the time between first period and marriage, which was usually less than 5 years. As such, the problem of what constituted virginity never arose, and was therefore never defined.

[TrajanJJ]

Popping cherry is losing virginity.

[FunkyMonkee]

Losing your virginity means you took a guy's dick in your puss and let him cum in you.

[JustinTheGreat]

old question but I’m answering anyways

Personally I think vaginal or anal sex counts as losing your virginity. But to each it’s own, I guess oral is technically a type of sex so I can understand why people would consider that as losing it

[TheStaleMarshmellow]

Oral sex is Foreplay. Third base.

[smilelots]

its not intercourse but its still a form of sex just not the baby making kind of sex.

[TheUglyMonk]

You lose virginity with any form of sexual act, anyone who says otherwise is delusional. Virginity means you engaged in sexual contact before and that's all there is to it; can't say I never had chocolate if I tasted it beforehand.

[Asker]

what is a sexual act? if you look at someone sexually is that a act? does doing a handjob mean you lose your virginity?

[TheUglyMonk]

Let me rephrase that; you lose your virginity if you engage in any form of sexual act with a member of the opposite or same sex.

[Asker]

So a handjob means you lose your virginity?

[Asker]

Or is that not a sexual act for you? If not, what is a sexual act?

[Ironic_Pepe]

Handjob = lost of virginity according to @TheUglyMonk

[Asker]

@TheUglyMonk Really?

[pizzalovershouse]

yes it does mean you loose it

[pizzalovershouse]

still is same it's sex

[CAsurfing]

It's dependent on weather the dick went into the vegene

[JayLiche]

Lucky ass banana