Does guys like bdsm?

[Anonymous]

I wish my boyfriend was more into bdsm, and would dominate me more. Is it weird for guys to like this or have I just caught someone who is vanilla? 😭🤷‍♀️

[MrOracle]

There's nothing that applies to ALL guys. Guys run a wide range of desires, just like women.

Some guys are into BDSM and some aren't. Some who are into BDSM aren't dominants or tops. Some who are are also switches who also wand those things done to them. Etc.

The thing is, you can't go out and find a guy you like and then expect to be able to change the things about him you don't like - that doesn't work. Your job is to find a guy you like and then VET him to see if you have long-term compatibility with him, and he with you - and if not, you end things and move on to the next one.

If you want a dominant guy, you need to find a guy who is ALREADY that way. You cannot change other people.

[AustinMan]

I'm an intense Dom and love it.

Is this helpful?

Why are men reluctant to dominate women sexually? ↗

Safe Words: How Do I Get My Partner to Dominate Me in Bed? ↗

[meesegoMoo]

I like the idea of domination, but can't stand the thought of anything even imitating sexual violence. The flogging or rough aspects disgust me. All of the pain stuff does.
I guess I'm only excited about her deciding to submit, that's the only aspect that seem like it could be enjoyable.

[Telekinetic-Potato]

Sounds like a double scoop of vanilla ice cream, if you want him to dominate you, you're gonna have to get the sauce

[ZackBan]

First let me tell you. Anyone who tells you how much of a Dom he is probably doesn't have much experience.
I was just like that. I love the concept of BDSM I'm very familiar with many techniques and the psychology behind it.
But when it comes down to it it takes a certain push of courage to do that kinda stuff. Your guy clearly lacks that. Doesn't mean he's agaisnt the idea he's just scared be might mean it up.

[Alexandrubaschet08]

SOME OF THEM YES, some of them like to dominate other to be dominate. Me i olso don't like BDSM becaus it can hurt realy bad thas all, now if my girl put me something in my hand to do her in a BDSM way i will go extremly easy on her

[AynonOMouse]

Maybe he is just too uncomfortable when talking about that kind of stuff. Try talking to him about it with texting. that might make it easier for him.

[LilPeenis]

Lots of guys like to BE dominated. Like you destroy his nutsack or whip him. Trust me. Make those testies your bitches

[NorthwestRider]

I do, love being the submissive one hehe

[joker_daddy]

I love girls that like to and want to be dominated

[joker_daddy]

You got a super vanilla sounds like you need to find someone new

[andy530]

I love it! It’s not everyone’s thing though

[andy530]

*update: sounds like it’s time for a serious talk or a new boyfriend

[Asker]

I've tried having serious talks and we do get somewhere with them, but I don't know. I guess we just clash in our sex drives

[andy530]

Yeah I’ve been in relationships like this and it is painful and exhausting

[Asker]

Yeah😅 did you just end up leaving or did you work it out?

[andy530]

I don’t really wanna get into it in public but if you want to pm I’d tell ya whatever you want to know

[FrenchyRomain]

you just caught a vanilla guy

[MrTaboo]

he's just vanilla. I'm a Dom

[B2281]

Depends on the partner.

[Femdomworld]

Yes!

[Anonymous]

Would love it!!! Being a sub or dom? I’m more of a sub but would switch if they dommed me using my fetish.

[Anonymous]

Bdsm is a rape charge waiting to happen. A friend of mine almost went to jail for it.

[Anonymous]

Yes I do but I’m the submissive and my SO is vanilla.

[Anonymous]

Yessssssss! I have chains attached at the base of my wall behind my headboard, I think 3 or 4 pairs of different kinds of cuffs, vibrators, butt plugs, a pretty long piece of satin rope, a few different kinds of short horse whips and paddles. I love smacking my girl on the ass, the face, choking her, and she loves it too. We're very in love so sometimes we have passionate sweet sex, but we get preeeeetty kinky most of the time lol. We have a rule that I'll continue to hit harder unless she says the safe word <3

[Opinion Owner]

I think you just found a man who likes it mostly vanilla. I'm sure you've heard those 6 devestating words that no sub ever wants to hear~ "I don't want to hurt you" lmao

[Opinion Owner]

I said yes, but I mean no its not weird. Yes to how great it is hahaha

[Asker]

That seems great. Did it take you a while to open up to bdsm or was it just something you've always been fascinated by?

[Asker]

Also, was it ever awkward for you to discuss toys and equipment with your partner?

[Opinion Owner]

It's something that my ex opened me up to and I've noticed most women like to be dominated, even if they only like it in subtle ways. Like holding them down, throwing them around. You'd be surprised how many women who say they're vanilla that enjoy being choked once they try it xD

[Opinion Owner]

I kinda started out softer and worked my way into it the more I found that it was just reeeaaallly hot lmao

[Asker]

Oh okay, thanks 😊

[Opinion Owner]

So here's my actual advice if you want to see if you can open him up to it the way it made me feel better about it~ Reassure him that it's something you want. If he's nervous about hurting you, make a safe word and work up in intensity so he knows you're enjoying it while you're making love. Maybe some spanking first. Just make sure if you work your way up to choking that you tell him the right way to do it... xD If he's just not into it and it turns him off you can't force him and shouldn't hold it against him either. Everybody is different and if he doesn't enjoy it, that's just who he is. Some people like it vanilla and there's nothing wrong with that. If that's the case, and you want to be with him still, you'll have to be okay with that. That last part is really important. Respect for other's feelings is priority #1

[Asker]

Thanks 😊

[Anonymous]

Hell Yes!!