Sexual Relationships
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Does sleeping around make you depressed?

I’ve been single for a few weeks now and I’ve been hooking up with a few guys but I just feel worthless afterwards everytime
1 1

Most Helpful Guys

  • Having sex isn't wrong by any means, but if it is causing you to be depressed, you may be a woman that prefers companionship and a solid partner to share that and intimacy with as a whole.

    Don't take what I say here as an attack on you or women in general. Women are the gatekeepers in terms of sex and the hookup lifestyle is pretty much a temporary high you get as if you were on drugs. Feel good in the moment and feel like drained shit at the end. Same goes with addiction. By sleeping around you are doing two things. You are seeking external validation and going against who you are as an individual to take your mind off of the pain.

    What you want is to be loved and accepted by another and receive the needs you seek at your core like most people really want. Connection, acceptance, love, free from judgment, etc. Going against this lowers self esteem and perceived value of yourself and others will notice it in the long run because that is what you will be putting forth.

    @AmandaYVR explained it well. Would suggest reaching out to her if you would like to talk further. She has given a lot of great takes and advice in general around these topics.

  • I know not having sex at all has made me depressed, but I can understand how random hook ups might not feel all that great if you're after a deeper connection. Sounds like it might be a more emotional connection you need, rather than a physical one.

    While I'm not suggesting getting into a new relationship if you're not ready for it, if hook ups are making you feel worse, it would be a good idea to stop for a while and maybe focus on existing relationships with friends instead and build up that emotional bonding for now.

    I do hope you feel better soon though.

Most Helpful Girls

  • can understand why you’d feel that way. But I think you’re looking at the situation incorrectly. If your feel bad it just means you’re having sex for wrong reason. If you’re having sex with them because you’re satisfying a biological need to have sex then there shouldn’t be feelings of guilt or remorse, however if you’re having sex with them because you have feeling for them or trying to get them to like you then you’ll always be disappointed in the result because you’ve involved feelings that most likely not being returned.

  • Sounds like you have come to the conclusion that the temporary high of having sex with strangers is not in the long run fulfilling because you know you're just using each other for sex. This is a base desire. It's easy to do, but it means very little.

    True fulfillment is about exposing who you are, not just your body, and finding connection that endures. What humans want (whether they all admit to it or not) is to be understood, known, and accepted.

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What Girls & Guys Said

1 18

  • You've answered your own question. Often people attempt to fill a void by taking the wrong action. In other words, attempting to fill an unseen spiritual void, through a mistaken physical one. Instead you need to fill yourself with the Holy Spirit, or at least, something spiritual. If you continue on this path, it will lead to more regret. There is a reason why this society promotes promiscuity so much. How often does society as a whole promote anything that leads to your ascension or benefit?

  • It can do yes, it all depends what you are hoping to get out if it, and why you are doing it in the first place.

  • If you are sleeping around too fill a void in your life, than you will feel a bit emotionally empty inside.

  • I have never done that. Would need willing girls.

  • That's because you are merely dissipating yourself. Dignity and self respect have gone out the window. Sex is supposed to be an act of love and intimacy and that can only happen if you have the sex with one person you really love and who really loves you, or else not have sex at all. Sleeping around promotes neither; you could not possibly love all those men you're sleeping with. The best you can get out of what you're doing is a few, fleeting moments of physical pleasure---along with anxieties about such things as unplanned pregnancy and diseases---but not happiness.

  • Well it might be different for a guy but I more feel like I am taking advantage of girls for sex and I feel really bad about and kinda hate myself for doing it. I kinda try not to have one night stands but the girls always if I want come over to there home and one thing leads to another then we end up having sex then I leave.

  • It really does make me depressed. I've been sleeping around for 26 years. Hotels here, hotels there. Oh, not with a woman, just for my work. And boy does it suck.

  • It can because having to much sex for either gender can be bad if its not with the same person. Loving someone and having sex with that person is better than one night stand

  • I suppose it could

  • why if you are hooking up a lot then you are a wanted woman that should make you happy

  • No it's not for anyone else to judge

  • True
    ...

  • Sleep with guys who don't make you feel worthless. You may ruined your chances with guys who only like sex in relationships but there are players out there who can make you feel like good life again

  • I can imagine that actually being nothing more than a hole for random people to ejaculate into would make someone feel worthless.

  • Casual sex is like a drug; it feels good at the time but it's a letdown later, especially for most women. I don't mean that to be sexist, it's just a reality for most women. Most regret it later. Take care of yourself.

    @AmandaYVR got this one right, and without the subtle misandry she has become so well known for on GAG over the last few years. Her advice here is solid.

  • Maybe God is trying to get your attention as to the wrongfulness of sex outside of marriage.

  • It made me horny all the freaking time. One long term overnight relationship everyday. When i finally stopped i slept for over 12hrs...

  • I had sex with a few girls
    and yes it does not make you feel better

    stay single and occupy your mind with things you enjoy

  • I don't like one time events, if that's what you mean. I like having a reliable friend or two.

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