Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health 
I come from a collectivistic culture and people are also very conservative here. It's India. The country with the most rapes, or otherwise now fondly called as 'Rape culture.'
I was dating a guy, one day he comes up to me to say that I should stop wearing shorts or anything semi- transparent. That was the day we started fighting.
I don't understand why men or anyone would advise a woman about what to wear but not walk up and tell a guy that he needs to behave. Is our society that ill-minded? If a woman gives up her choice and covers up, why can't a man cover his eyes and mouth?
When you go to a beach and you wear beach shorts and some men take pictures of you, I definitely got furious but I was scared to go to the police because I didn't know if they will harass me too. And to make it all more hard for me, the families sitting around did not give a shit about it and some were laughing at my uncovered legs.
Priyanka Chopra wearing a dress in front of the Prime minister became hot news over the whole country and people couldn't bare that shit. But please, people need to be sensible about the issues bothering our country.
When people have all the guts to tell a woman what to wear, how to talk, and all that why not walk up to fellow men and tell them to behave?
Stop stigmatizing children from birth. A girl needs to be gifted everything in pink and a boy in blue and girls with Barbies and guys with guns and cars. Seriously people? I was gifted guns and cars and I was gifted barbies too. I still remember I used to break the barbies hands and legs and throw it off. I loved the guns more. What's wrong? People tag me to be a tomboy now. Sorry! I was just brought up to be bold and embrace equality.
So when I talk about equality, to all the women around there who still think a guy should pay the bills and open the doors or he should propose to her please go back to BC. Grow up. When we talk about equality, it's in everything. Be bold to pay your own bills and buy a diamond. Be proud.
And the conservatism in my country, I don't really know if it does any good to anyone but I am definitely sure it does bad. We are being watched even when we talk to someone from the opposite culture. So the ideas of what is the opposite gender like is always in mind. So comes the rape culture. "We wanted to teach the girl a lesson as she was roaming at night" with a guy said an asshole, a rapist who inserted a rod in her vagina and was gang raped. This happened four years back and hence been something which was looked up by some rapists who followed doing the same to women.
I wish the youngsters had all the brains to stop bothering about why Priyanka Chopra wore a dress infront of the Prime minister rather try to behave!
Sincerely, a boiled up Indian woman who is scared of being raped when I go out or even when I am in my home locked up.
What Girls & Guys Said
14 49the thing about this is you are demonizing all boys by telling them to behave. you are assuming all of them are rapist. telling women to protect themselves is not wrong but telling boys to not rape is wrong.
An insightful mytake about another culture.
I think they mean it's easier to do that than change some men's nature.
But they don't realise this way they are only making women to be under men?
Good point. You can look at it that way. But I'd say "They are only making women to be protected from men" There are many great guys out there stay away from those a**holes. And women should be sure not to try a sexually provoke and tease, as there are those that do. Battle of attraction between the sexes I would say, and this is wrong.
True. Trying to attract someone in a club and disturbing public is different. But don't you think men should know to control also?
are you serious? You're saying harrassing and raping women if they're dressed a certain way is in men's nature?
Of course. I never said they shouldn't. All men are different and there are far more respectable and loving males out there in the 🌎. F**K those women-haters.
@nalaa "some" men's nature. Very few of course. Certain men rape and harass out of hate or lack of self-control.
I think men need to understand, they can't go touch a woman because he got horny and fellow men should understand this rather than tagging women to be sluts. And babies of 2 years and so are getting raped. I wish you men have some reason to say. Maybe those men saw that she had a vagina too and want to feel if it is like an adult's vagina? Rather than supporting your gender you guys should feel things from a woman's perspective too.
You can't possibly be saying all men are like this? That is far from the truth.
@myTake Owner, why do you keep saying men why dont you say some men. I dont blame you for being raped by my young nanny as a child, my best friend doesn't blame women being raped as child either by the maid. We grew up in different countries and till date we haven't had the courage to tell our moms or anyone close to us. Why did my nanny do this to me?
She was aware it was wrong yet she decided to fuck a child. Rape is about desire and power. What people are saying is do not leave your safety in the hands of someone elses morality. For instance, we teach kids not to talk to strangers but its not like they deserve to be abducted just for talking to stranger.
If kids had the capacity to reason the way youve have been thought to, they would say, "why can't we feel safe just talking to strangers?". Most component of rape is power over smn+lack of empathy. Statistics of women raping men through drugs is almost equal with men doing same. the number for men raping triples those of women only because they can physically overthrow women, rape weaker men in prison, same reason stronger women rape weaker women in prison. When I moved to the capital city in my home country everyone told me not accept drinks from guys, cos the city's gay community have a reputation for spiking drinks and raping straight men. I was cautious and took heed to their advice. No question about equality. Only me is primarily responsible for my safety.
Rape is the rapist's fault but your safety is your responsibility.
Also, stop with the "teach men not to rape" crap. It's teach rapists not to rape. Every man out there isn't a potential rapist.
Scumbags are scumbags
Can I do both? That seems like a better option.
All it takes one crazy person to rape and kill you. Even if you were successful in socially engineering men to behave as you dictate some won't and they will be the ones who rape you
I totally understand and i am so happy that someone adressed this topic b/c guys really do need to learn how to be respectful of everyone including thierselfs and this culture dose need to stop looking at woman as if they are only good in bed b/c we are not there are some very talented girl engineers that i know and they are the greatest.
People should not bow down to your arrogant demand, what you demand is ridiculous. Society reserves the right to breed and raise men as aggressive and arrogant beings for it's own self defense but the same society prefers to humiliate and deride weaker members of our gender and you are part of the problem YOU DESERVE TO BE TREATED AS A PIECE OF MEAT FOR SEXUAL PURPOSES BUT YOU HAVE IT QUITE EASY COMPARED TO HOW YOU REALLY SHOULD HAVE BEEN TREATED BECAUSE YOU PLACE ALL RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR PROTECTION ON AN ANOTHER GENDER ALL THE WHILE CREATING UNNECESSARY AND UNWANTED PROBLEMS FOR SOCIETY INCREASING ITS PROBLEMS AND BURDENS ADDING TOWARDS THEM. WHY shouldn't YOU BE HELD RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR FAILURE IN INTEGRATING INTO SOCIETY? WHY IS IT THAT EVERYONE ELSE IS TO BLAME FOR YOUR FAILURE WHILE THE BURDEN OF SOCIETY KEEPS EXCEEDING ITSELF? THAT BURDEN ALSO FORCES OTHER MEN TO BE EVEN MORE AGGRESSIVE, CRUELLER TOWARDS EACH OTHER TO SUSTAIN SOCIETY AND CIVILIZATION AND THE AGGRESSION AND CRUELTY JUST INCREASES EXPONENTIALLY. Originally It's not a man's duty or identity to protect women , people do it because they are kind to those close to them.
If men let you wear what ever the hell you want, but ignore you completely and that means no relationship or even friendship. are you down with that?
OK, you can even go out nude. Girls like showing their bodies.
If we lived in a perfect world I would say you're in the right but like we're not...
If you don't want to get hit on or anything more then dress in a ways that don't send the wrong message.
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If you don't want your cooter poked, don't dress and act like you do. And don't get falling down drunk. Legitimate rape happens to less than 1 out of 10,000,000 women. The rest of them were asking for it.
women take judgement and others opinions way to seriously that's why there is so much pressure on women is because they take it in. Men don't have as much pressure because we don't give a shit until we try and date women who the put all the pressure on us to provide for them and all there pressure BS.
Respect goes both ways. If he doesn't want to be seen as a creep/rapist then he shouldn't act like one. If she doesn't wanna be seen as a slut/hoe then she shouldn't act like one. "RESPECT" for gender goes both ways. The problem with feminism is - It doesn't hold women accountable.
Later on today I'll being going to the strip club with some friends to see some naked women. In my mind I see them as the dictionary word - "whore". Do you think they care? They just want our money. And if I talk to her the right way we may end up having $ex too. So should I not see them as prostitutes? But this type of behavior is perfectly acceptable in the eyes of feminism.
There needs to be accountability for both creeps and whores. Feminism will not allow this ever happen. So why the complaint?
Dressing do big impression on people, cause we were attracted to what we see nice physically, what I mean is that you have dress appropriate in public so people will respect you.
It might be a cultural difference, but it seems like you do not delineate actions from thoughts. In the US men are frequently criticized for impure thoughts whenever some kind of dress code is forced upon men. While no style of clothing excuses the wrongful actions, I have issues when men are accused of impure thoughts.
The action of controlling people's thoughts seems even more ridicoulous when you examine it. For example, the argument that sexualization or objectification is in the eye of the beholder rather than with the actor. If we apply that idea to say a magazine, it sounds ridicoulous. You wouldn't say, "Jim objectified a Lindsay when he read a Maxim article where Lindsay was in a skimpy bikini". You'd say, "Maxim objectified Lindsay by showing her in a skimpy bikini". Because sexualization and objectification are things performed by an actor, not an observer. This seems to hold true for everything except dress codes.
It's true that India Is far from equality, respect and safe for woman.
But I let you on an short story from my country (somewhere in the west): I went on an interview for an office job for an international company almost all candidate was wearing office clothes (Man and woman). One girl came with booty short that were so tight that her ass cheek were like this (See the link below) and tank top showing a lot of cleavage and her flat tummy. When the interviewer (Woman younger than the one wearing booty short) saw that she started to laugh and said :
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You ain't getting the job no Mather what you you've put on your resume or say... go home.
Then, the booty short woman got up and started talking aggressively to the other woman and they started to argue. Thing really got out of control and the booty short woman slapped and pulled the hair of the the interviewer. I got up and had to separate the booty short woman from the interviewer. The interviewer manage to broke free and the booty short woman put her nail on my left arm (After 5 year I still have the scar). Everyone (there was only 1 other person in the room) ran from the scene and the cops got called to remove the crazy out of the scene. The interviewer came back to see if I was OK and thanked me to helping hers. Later that day I was called and they said I was hire not because I protected the interviewer like a knight but because I did the right thing to do... Help someone who was in danger. She is also a good friend now and her husband is my best bros (I don't work with her anymore).
I do think most people who dress provocative in public (keyword public) are more aggressive people (psychologically). Maybe not as much as the booty short girl from that story. They want soft reaction (non verbal reaction and verbal reaction) so they can complain about those reaction. It's a way for them to make them interesting. It's also a form of manipulation. Keep in mind, I will never behave badly with those woman. I will simply evade them because they want negative attention mostly.
Like my mother always said to my sister while she was growing up :
There's place and time to wear trashy stuff and it's not in public. But don't go on dressing as a nun because you are a free woman. Balance is the way to go.
I love you mom and I miss you.
Your moms a legend man. Im gonna say that same line if i have daughters. Damn that one is smooth. Or maybe its better if i have ny wife say it 😅
well in america its the opposite I'm affriad to talk to girls because one tried to say I touched her. The reason? so that she could date a guy who kept saying she should date me because were more compatible. My life would have ended and I would have been thrown in jail and labeled a rapist if there was not a camera over the hallway where she lied and said I touched her. Im so happy she got to blow the guy she wanted so bad at the back of my job. feminism yay
I understand that women try to overule because of the privileges given. It should be eradicated too. Sorry for what you had undergone!