Feeling bad my dark fantasy came out even if my boyfriend likes it? Should I still?

It finally came out and he took a moment and told me the sweetest thing while hugging me!

But I still feel so bad for wanting it! Will that feeling go away if we act it out?

3 2

Superb Opinion

  • There are many reasons that people have fantasies (and remember, there's no moral component to WANTING something; thoughts aren't actions!), and sometimes, an event, or even an idea, will throw you for so much of a loop that it rattles around in your brain like a pebble in a tin can, and acting it out under carefully controlled circumstances can help you dislodge it- or at least the fascination.

    If it's something you want to try, and it's impactful enough, you may want to ensure that both you and your boyfriend have safe words- even if it's not physically intense, it may get mentally intense, for either one of you, and it's better to have a ripcord and not need it than to need it and not have it.

    Now, the fact that he heard it without judgement and offered acceptance and reassurance is a good sign; if you think you want to do it (some fantasies are better left as fantasies, and it's not always easy to tell whether that's true of something or not), talk to him about your insecurities with the idea, and see what he has to say.

Most Helpful Guy

  • It might go away but what you have to think about is the possibility that doing your fantasy in reality may not match the fantasy in your mind. Some things are better as fantasies.

    • No it can't really match but we can play with it. I did some of his and liked it. Maybe just feeling guilty for hidding it

    • You shouldn't feel guilty as easy as it is for me to say that. You had tremendous strength to talk about it.

Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions

What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!

What Girls & Guys Said

1 11
  • Wonder what it is?

  • 1. Your profile says you are married. And you told a BOYFRIEND about the fantasy?

    2. Are you wanting us to ask about your fantasy?

    • When I put married the guys judge huge!

  • You can't control what you like. Try to stop feeling bad and enjoy the fact that it's no longer a secret.

  • That's why it is a fantasy. Don't feel bad about it.

    • What if I wanna do it?

    • That could be find and could be hot amd exciting. As long as it is legal I guess.

  • i hope dear, as a shared
    proclivity is a wonderful thing