Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health 
To give this take some context, I took recently to watching an old video that the local church library was giving away. It seemed to me like it could have had potential to teach something to today's world that had been forgotten, so I gave it a chance.
What I found...was a textbook list of reasons as to why the well-intentioned Focus on the Family from James Dobson's still-living days ultimately lost its ability to have any sway in American culture. A good list of things that need to be addressed today, and how this video tried and failed.
For any others wishing to encourage youth to embrace self-control and abstinence - let alone a Biblical model of sex and marriage and reasons for either - consider this review of "The Myth of Safe Sex" to be a warning of how NOT to go about it!
Parents especially, take notes while your kids are still young! Because if you wait until your daughter is 15 and her screwl is teaching her how to play multi-boy testicle dodgeball with her tongue, you'll be too late to win her back from the psychological pedophiles that have corrupted her mind!
So here's where this 1993 video and tool for families went wrong:
1. Presentation
This cannot be understated. The culture war in America continges on seduction of youth, both toward their economic / humanistic dogma and toward their views on sexuality - which strike at the very core of what it means to be male and female, and able to interact!
If your package wrapping is subpar, the unintelligent will never look past the outer wrapping.
Everything in the 90s looks horrible and cheesy by today's production standards, but the particular combination of 90s cliches in this video particularly stand out as reasons why Dobson didn't succeed at convincing a single teen to save themselves for marriage with this video.
First, there's the VHS cover. You never see that shot anywhere else. The cover seems to suggest following some anecdotal journey that documents all the false securities that befall the "just use a condom, and everything will be fine" message that is still preached to this day, and is even more wrong today than when it was first popularized.
No such anecdote followed by the camera ever occurs in the video itself, not with a real couple nor with actors and a script.
It's the 90s equivalent of clickbait, before there was a widespread web use statistic to invent the term.
Both the beginning and ending of this video show us a completely unrelated mountain climb. This is supposed to be a journey of faith metaphor; but students given no foundation of faith early in life are not going to understand that metaphor at all!
This is incredibly tone deaf, and strikes of a "preaching to the choir" mentality. Except, the video doesn't even preach to its choir that well. I'll get into that more later.
Since the 80s, Christian media loved using that mountain climb metaphor for the "perilous journey of faith through life." Except, it barely makes sense in context, and is incomprehensible to outsiders. Moreover, it looks trite from the get-go. It did popularize mountain climbing as a sport for secular media, to the point that the "extreme sports" look worship permeated everything in the 80s and early 90s.
This went so far, in fact, that even VR Troopers is saturated with it! It's a cliche that started dying off after the 90s, and we can be thankful it did!
From there, we get a cheesy soundtrack that reeks of being very 80s rock influenced. And the low-grade 80s rock too, not the power ballad epic Journey stuff you'd hope for. This isn't Stan Bush. It's much too low-grade for that.
Even Chvrches couldn't make a soundtrack to this video sound good - let alone resonant to a modern audience!
All this is followed NOT by a direct presentation aimed straight at the video's viewer, like most modern-day education (indoctrination) videos are.
Instead, it takes the far less emotionally investing role of merely showing you Dobson and a guest speaker in a room (Joe McIllhaney, MD) with a bunch of volunteers - all of them from local area churches most likely - as Dobson talks for almost an hour and lectures them like they're a college class session.
He doesn't even captivate his audience that well with his speech mannerisms, and they appear bored even as they discuss something that should interest them!
Rarely do they ask questions, and rarely does anyone attempt to ask a question in the whole video which would credibly challenge Dobson nor McIlhaney.
These details alone are why such videos failed to reach the youth they were intended for, which accelerated American culture's decline to the sex-obsessed cesspool it is today. Sure, your grandparents were wowed. However, where were the celebrities getting behind this family leader and his ob/gyn guest? But it doesn't end there.
2. Lack of Detail
When describing the failures of condoms, they failed to address WHY so many of them fail.
Sheepskin condoms are worthless, as they are full of holes. HPV and HIV are so small, that the tiny holes in sheepskin are like tunnel entries on the freeway. But latex is another story. Rubber-like materials are one giant molecule. So why would latex fail? CHEMISTRY!
The video never goes into the most critical reason for failure, and it has nothing to do with temperature at storage nor with "correct usage."
What degrades latex and rubber fastest? OIL! And what is one of the most corrosive oils to ultra-thin rubber? Human skin oil!!! Add in sweat and sexual fluids, and you have a chemical soup guaranteed to degrade it! Add in temperature and friction, even with lubrication (usually made of some type of oil!), and relying solely on a condom for protection is Russian roulette right off the bat!
Did the video discuss any of this science? No. It missed out on a HUGE opportunity!
Also missing was discussion of secondary infections that manifest more easily inside those suffering primary STD infections.
Sometimes, these secondary infections spread the same way as non-sexual diseases: airborne! Or through blood or saliva! Maybe not always HIV, but a secondary infection reinforced by it CAN sometimes be spread by something as seemingly innocent as a kiss. So even keeping the uglies from bumping is no absolute guarantee that you'll be without risk!
Once again, Dobson never even touched on this! Secondary infections in those whose immune systems are already compromised by an STD will often grow a lot stronger inside the initial host than they ever can hope to when inside a host with a healthy immune system, leading to the secondary host having a much tougher time fighting the infection.
Also not discussed: leaks, and points of entry.
If contact with skin alone can spread a particular infection, then any leak of infected fluid onto a partner's legs puts your legs at risk of contact! Which means, unless you're wearing a FULL BODY condom, then protecting only two parts from making contact with each other directly will NOT eliminate all disease risk!
It's a little like storing killer bee honey in your house, putting a roof over the house to keep the bee nest in the tree above your roof from getting in, and assuming you have no need to also close the windows and stock up on bug spray!
These are all things that you probably will NOT hear from left-leaning sex "education" programs aimed at your kids. After all, they'd rather have preschoolers fellating each other on the playground, like in California a few years ago! Dobson would be spinning in his grave until his coffin burned up and caused an earthquake, if only he could see what has been done to youth in that state in the present day!
3. Never Tackling the Conceits of Iniquity
"They all tell the kids this, because they are fully convinced that they will be having sex sooner rather than later anyway."
Yes, but WHY is there such cynicism??? Even in 1993, there was far less reason for such cynicism than today. So why was it so prevalent???
What leads to sexual motivation early on, besides simple hormonal urges?
Curiosity
This is a pretty easy one. Sex feels like a warm brat between two hot cod fillets. But a lot wetter. Parents need to explain it to their kids, in terms that blunt. Demystify the physical act itself, without them having to actually perform the act to experience demystification. And an orgasm? Like licking your favorite ice cream flavor, only the punch to your brain from inside is a lot stronger. That's how oxytocin / vassopressin and serotonin work.
Addiction
Speaking of the chemistry of sex, these same chemicals are also a big deal when discussing drug addiction. Parents need to address this too. Those who do cross the line, and can't get enough of sex, can become addicts for the same reasons that crack and heroin make you an addict: they affect the reward center of your brain.
From a religious perspective, it's an abuse of the brain God gave you to misuse its reward center. Hence, the "Thou Shalt Nots" against sexual experimentation are foresight regarding brain chemistry, not the "bullying" that the world wants you to believe them to be.
If more parents could competently explain that to kids, there'd be a lot fewer kids feeling the urge to experiment.
Affirmation
In our narcissistic age, affirmation is everything. Virgin shaming is much worse and far less sensical than slut shaming, and is now even more common.
The bullies who engage in it are a large part of why the incel community is so bitter and hateful. And like the dingbats they are, said bullies never accept any responsibility for the monsters they create. They deserve to suffer the same sentence as whatever murderer they inspired, whether they can admit it to themselves or not.
However, affirmation is the trap that even adults can't escape anymore. If no one wants to have sex with you, society tells you that your worth is precisely zero. This is boneheaded; but the corrupt would not have it any other way! It gives them raw power!
Kids trapped in such a system are given a very simple message in life: hook up with someone, or you are precisely worthless! I've seen this mindset creep into my own family, affecting siblings of mine as they pursued whom they wished to marry one day, and leading to compromises they later regretted - with partners who were genuinely worthless, as their personal character could attest!
Everyone wants to feel affirmed, whether or not they've earned it. However, modern narcissism demands it to the extreme. Dobson gets a free pass on this one; because he lived in a still mostly-Christian American culture where this was not really a thing.
He could not have predicted the culture's dramatic fall from grace from 1998-onward. Sexual sanity died the day 20/20 aired that fake news piece about Matthew Shepherd, trying to cover up that the killers were themselves degenerate gays and trying to cover up the fact that he was killed over drug money.
When squawk show hosts made like Nero and started blaming Christians out of pure bigotry - in spite evidence of the exact opposite - and churches didn't immediately jump to condemn the libel of these show hosts and take action against it; it set a precedent that the church could be blamed for everything up to and including the common cold. And that the church would (and should) somehow do nothing about it!
From there, the purveyors of degeneracy kicked their agenda into high gear, convinced that the last bastions of real resistance could barely even slow them down anymore.
In 1993, Dobson could not have foreseen the fast arrival of such a world. The quick snap back to penance in 2001, followed by hysterical rebellion and rejection of God following exactly two years later, as the enemies of all that is good made it clear that not even 9/11 would sway them from their iniquity.
4. No Mention of Emotional Abuse
Let's face it: the pursuit of sex is never just sex!
Regardless of how you try to seek it outside the Biblical model, there is some level of abuse involved in doing so. However, need for affirmation, if not tackled in other ways in time, leads to loss of self-esteem. This is extremely dangerous, and you don't need to be an expert on the Bible to know this is so!
Another way you know that "safe" sex is a myth is because we're not just meat bags seeking to mash meat bits together. We have minds and souls, that want some sort of exchange to enrich us.
However, corrupt methods to get sex often betray a mind corrupted in other ways. This begets other dangers. Feeling used. Being taken advantage of. Your time, energy, emotional investment, energy...wasted. Promises broken. Anger. Frustration. Lies. Betrayals. Indifference. Broken hearts. Revenge flowing through one's mind.
If God is not in the relationship, it will always have a serious risk of turning toxic. Always. Even if He is, to not honor his terms is to play chicken with the prospect of expelling him from the equation. Which may even open one's self up to even worse conceits, making the relationship even more toxic!
Emotional damage and baggage are just as worth noting as the damages of actual sex. Especially since you don't require actual sex to be emotionally betrayed and damaged!
But to what extent does the video address this? Almost NONE at all!
If you don't address the emotional needs of those susceptible to seduction, you fail to disarm their tempters. You can preach against STDs until you're blue in the face.
But you can't cheat Reba McEntire's warnings about what desperation can do to the human heart, to the point of overriding common sense:
"...the heart is a lonely hunter. With only one desire. To find some lasting comfort in the arms of a lover's fire. Driven by a desperate hunger. To the dark of the neon light.
The heart is a lonely hunter, when there's no sign of a love in sight."
In conclusion
Dobson's intentions are admirable, as one can conclude from various lines of dialog in the video.
Somewhere, he says something to the effect of:
"God's law is not supposed to be a bully club used to beat us over the head with for his own amusement. Rather, it is a curb lovingly put there, to guide us on the road and avoid the dangers just off it."
This was in response to a question of whether or not HIV was intended as a specific punishment for promiscuous sex. Dobson's answer was wise, but also missed an opportunity. He could have stated as well: "Unless he states as such specifically, we should be mindful not to pretend to know the mind of God too far beyond what God himself states to be true of his mind."
The video had all the good intentions and trappings of the beginnings of what could have been a good way to lead children away from the sexual anarchy and insanity of today. Yet...it missed its mark in many tragic ways.
As a consequence, we now have a world where Globalists and corporate sellouts to their agenda collude in cronyism to find ways to force lifestyle vaccines on the public. They know the risks involved, and don't care. They know the benefits of abstinence; so this is how they undermine said benefits. If you have no choice but to get the vaccine, and it goes horribly wrong, then why did you even bother to abstain? May as well have sex anyway, like everyone else! That was the entire point of Gardasilgate.
Such an evil was incomprehensible in Dobson's day. And it shows by how unprepared his video was to protect the culture. Forget about slippery slopes; this is total moral freefall! This video demonstrates how unprepared the moral guardians of old were to prepare anyone for the arrival of such evil.
What Girls & Guys Said
0 0