Sexual Relationships
2 mo

Guys, What would you do if your wife of multiple years forced a sexless marriage on you, while telling you porn and masturbation is not allowed also?

!!! IMPORTANT NOTE!!! This is not me, This situation did not happen to me thank god.

Say you have been with your wife for over a decade. you're a very sexual person. your wife says you're obsessive. She is the only women you've ever been with. You have 3 children. Your desire for her has not waned, You'd like to have sex daily (multiple times). She has almost no desire and never initiates. Early on in your relationship she cut you off from porn. Then soon after she banned you from jerking off altogether. You are only having sex 1 or 2 nights a month and sometimes we skip months. Should she not be allowed to deny sex, if you're not allowed to take care of it yourself?

Additionally: You feel like you've been trapped. your kids are your only source of joy. She would leave and take the kids If she caught you watching porn. She gets upset if there is a sex scene in a movie that lasts longer than 15 seconds.

Guys what would you do? How would you deal with this?

First, let me clarify, Man or woman, No one owes the other sex. How ever if your needs are not being met, Plus you're not allowed to do any form of self care, I would see the marriage, the relationship as untenable at best, and as Damaging at worst. If she is indeed like the above, I would file for divorce, and do everything in my power to leave with the children. I dont want her poisonous ideas to be pushed to them, Especially if im the divorcing party.

Many years ago, i was with a woman a lot like her. I was not married to her, But we were together for two years. She told me i was not allowed to masturbate, i was not permitted access to porn, I was not allowed interaction with the opposite sex, including family members who were the opposite sex. If we were watching a movie with sex in it, i was REQUIRED to look at her and not the screen. Oh and none of these requirements applied to her. She got violent toward the end so i kicked her. She sliced my face because of that.

0 4

Most Helpful Guys

  • "Early on in your relationship she cut you off from porn." Who gave her that power?

    "Then soon after she banned you from jerking off altogether." How did she do that?

    "Should she not be allowed to deny sex," . . . yes, she has that right. . . "if you're not allowed to take care of it yourself?" Again, why do you need her permission?

    "You feel like you've been trapped." You allowed yourself to be trapped.

    "She would leave and take the kids If she caught you watching porn." Then you hire an attorney and establish your rights for custory and/or visitation.

    Your former girlfriend sounds bpd.

    • Believe it or not when your in an abusive relationship, you'd be surprised at what you'd put up with. Because when she is nasty, she's nasty, but when she was nice it made all of that go away.. Until she was mean again. Believe it or not men can be abused too.

    • Yes, that is the typical pattern with bpd women.

    • Thanks for MHO!

  • This is the kind of stuff you need to sniff out before you get married. Most guys know or have a feeling this shit is happening but they still get married to the person. So if it does happen then you simply go for the divorce and pay for your stupidity.

    • Agreed, it's why I kicked the ex to the curb.

    • However there are some women who are into sex constantly prior to marriage, but the moment you put a ring on it, it stops.

    • There are always "one off's" in life. Some men also stop dating their wife and sit around and drink beer all night expecting her to get all excited and aroused with a dude who has gained 40 pounds and smells like Miller light. There are all kinds of circumstances.

    • Show All

Most Helpful Girls

  • I would just masturbate behind her back.. someone can't tell you that you can't get off if they ain't pleasing you sexually.. lol

  • Divorce. But also guys, bodily autonomy. What you do with your own body is not her business and she has 0 say.

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What Girls & Guys Said

0 21

  • We all have needs. For the vast majority of people, sexual release is one of those needs. Communication, mutual respect, and understanding are critical to the success of any marriage.

    So, the bigger issue here, for me, is why the wife is suddenly disinterested in sex and why she is attempting to forbid all forms of sexual release for her partner.

    Best thing to do would be to talk it out.

    I would never be able to stop masturbating entirely. It just isn't realistic for me. So, I wouldn't be able to give her what she is wanting and I would be upfront about that.

  • She couldn't "ban" me from watching porn or masturbating. I wouldn't even conceal it.
    If she harassed me about it, I might say that if she was a woman, I wouldn't have to. "Get on your knees and suck my dick, bitch." "Now who's the boss?" LOL

  • Well this answer of knowing it before... counts for both.. if she already knew he was sex addicted.. she should not marry him... if he knew the she don't want to have sex. . Same thing.. however the thing is they have 3 kids... so who is she kidding?

    Her self for having sex anyway and got 3 kids. Or him that she like it anyway?

    The only thing i wonder right now

    ... where do you guys get the inspiration for all these weird questions 🤣🤭😁🤣🤣

    • Part of it is life experience, part of it is a friend who is going through hell right now in his divorce

    • Been there... done that... wish the friend well and all the strength...

  • I think I would have no choice but to frame her for cheating. I would do everything I could to make her do it and if that didn't work, I would literally hire someone to fake it and admit it.

    Not because I want anything bad to happen to her but because I'm not letting my kids loose both their parents. Obviously at that point I did a bad job at picking a mother.

    When you're in any kind of relationship, married or not it's your responsibility to fulfill your role and maintain each other's needs. I see a lot of people on here talking about not forcing sex.

    I get it, but if you married someone and that person has been upfront with you about their sexuality, there's a minimum standard which should be adhered to. If you can't understand that, then you're either sick in the head or never had anyone call you out for being selfish.

  • I'd insist on being allowed to masturbate, but otherwise I'd be fine with that kind of arrangement, especially if she's having sex with others guys fairly frequently.

    • Yeah you're a cuck though. In this situation she's not having sex with anyone. And also forbade him from masturbation. by the way I don't mean cuck as an insult here, it's just what that kind of situation is, where she does nothing with you but has multiple men.. It's called cuckolding..

    • That's true; being a cuck kind of throws off the answer a little bit.

  • It won't be a sexless marriage. We are just debating if I'm going to be having sex with HER or not. Also, nobody is going to tell me that porn and masturbation isn't allowed, because I have to do something to get that first one out of the way when I'm on the way to meet my lover.

  • "Forced" -- how is she forcing me to remain in this marriage, and how is she able to tell me what I am and am not allowed to do?

  • I don't live in a world where a wife has that authority or control. She wouldn't be able to eliminate AV or Masturbation even if she tried. If she arbitrarily cut me off from sexual intimacy and there were no children, I would divorce her. If there were children, I would work out an arrangement where I got periodic sexual relations outside the home; probably with a "practitioner", and pull the plug when the last child graduated high school and moved out.

  • Jeez, what a long winded post. I almost quit halfway through it. If I was married I would have ti live with it

  • You meant to say ‘ex’ right? Seriously, that 💩 wouldn’t last a week a week with me. Maybe if hospitalization or trauma was involved 🤔

  • It’s things like this why people cheat. I’m not a dog on a leash waiting for a treat whenever you feel like it

  • WOW sounds like my x it was like that she was never wanting to make love fuck etc and she would never take me in her mouth the only thing she let me do now and then was eat her ,, that she loved but it was still only every 5 or 6 times a year. she caught me masturbating a few times and told me it was wrong I have her she said ,, thing was she never wanted to have sex with me much at all.. its over now and im ok with who I am.. with out her.

  • This is such an unrealistic situation. I would never progress that far into a relationship with someone who would do something like that. But if I did, then I suppose I would separate myself from her.

  • Sex is part of the marriage contract. IF someone's violating that part of the agreement, then anything is on the table.

  • Leave her and divorce her

  • just divorce, or have a affair or get separated, its not rocket science

  • divorce

  • Just like the song it's D. I. V. O. R. C. E

  • I'd leave

  • Replace the witch

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