He "comes" way to fast…?

[Anonymous]

Okay so this is kind of a problem that annoys both me and my partner. When we are to have sex, we usually have a really heated foreplay because that's the only way to get me really wet (no we don't like to use lube because it makes my senses down there A LOT more weekend). So when I'm "finally" wet enough, we start the "real sex" but he seriously comes right away. He feel really embarrassed over this, and I always say that I don't mind and stuff… which is a lie but I don't want to hurt him because I know he really can't do anything about it. The main problem might be that he get's REALLY turned on while turning me on (which is normal I guess). We've tried stuff like thick condoms and other stuff that will make him last longer, but then it either hurts for him, or he doesn´t feel a lot, or the worst thing; his blood flow to his penis stop and it start to really hurt, or his willy "fall asleep"(he is very big so we have to use the big sized condoms, which helps a bit, but not enough). He really feel bad for this, and he always gives me oral or something afterwards… but do any of you have any advice for us?

[kheserthorpe]

Yeah, It's not one thing, but there's a sort of collection of strategies that he can use together. Success rate on treating this is VERY high if he is motivated and you are supportive. It sounds like he IS motivated (he wants to last longer, he does take care of you after), and you're supportive, so no reason to think this can't be improved.

I will mention that stress and pressure make things -worse-. So remember the goal here is not for him to never cum fast. It's to make it so often it lasts longer. But any given day if it doesnt' happen, its not the end of the world, and you can still enjoy each other.

The best resource i know of on dealing with this is www.pegym.com/forums/premature-ejaculation-forum/ forum. Check out in particular the following stickied threads:
www.pegym.com/forums/premature-ejaculation-forum/26147-what-we-know-so-far-about-pe-its-causes-its-treatment. html
www.pegym.com/forums/premature-ejaculation-forum/28535-byggds-guide-controlling-your-ejaculation-response. html

Basic overview? He's going to learn/do a few things:
- become much more aware of his arousal level. If he's just flying along and then realizes 'i'm about to cum' that's hard to deal with. He needs to be aware of the signs he's getting excited too fast, or he's getting close to the point of getting close to cumming. It's much easier to slow down at that point then right at the edge.
- develop a variety of techniques to bring arousal level slightly down. These will include, from perhaps 'least noticeable to you' to most noticeable: mental relaxation, controlled breathing, conscious pelvic floor relaxation, reverse kegels, held kegel followed by reverse kegel, slowing down along with above, stopping for a second along with above, pulling out for a moment along with any of the above. The 'better' he gets, the more he'll be able to use the early ones primarily.
- get used to lasting longer so that his brain doesn't anticipate trying to cum so quickly. His response can be retrained so its less work for him to override it.

Good luck, feel free to message me if it helps.

[cobrar97]

I agree with the metal training and other ideas. I never had a problem with cumming to early, but I really wanted to have total control so I could go a long time if I wanted to.
Over a long time of training myself, a lot through masturbation, and a lot through just trial and error of what I had learned... after about a year, I'm where I am today.
I can now have sex pretty much however I want. I can actually penetrate my girl in any position for over an hour if she wants it. During a sex-session, she normally has about 8 orgasms with 5-10 minutes between. I can now do any position, no matter how stimulating and control the entire thing. She absolutely loves it... she can do whatever she wants however hard she wants.
And it was all basically using the techniques recommended before... just trying, practicing, and over and over. He'll get there, but it's hard work... but the training can be FUN if you are helping him!! Good luck.

[MaskedSanity]

Give him a blowjob, make him cum. Once that's done, THEN move onto foreplay to get you wet.

By the time you're all wet and ready, your man should be ready to go another round and he'll last A LOT longer.

That's how we solved that problem, lol.

[slackercruster]

Have him jack off a time or two the day before. Use up some of that sperm. As long as he still gets hard have him jack off a lot to dull the sensitivity down some. If he still cums quick have him work on you with his tongue and fingers till you cum. If he has problems getting you off use a vibrator and have him suckle and caress your nipples and finger you. You should cum first, in the middle and last.

[madhatters4]

maybe get him off first then wait til he gets hard again and then have sex...

otherwise he needs to work on mentally being able to control himself. masturbation can help as a guy can become familiar with how he feels as he is about to climax and being able to control himself

[yaddayaddayadda02]

The first thing to understand is that if you're both satisfied with your sexual encounters, why worry about how long or short the duration is?

Secondly, you can try giving him a handjob/bj, let him have an orgasm from that... start the foreplay on you, then by that time he should be ready for round 2 and sex should last longer.

[Anonymous]

Just let him bust and then get him hard again! He'll last a lot longer the second time!