I can't say for certain of particular positions; I think sex for each couple is different, even from session to session, and perhaps what will give you an orgasm on any given day may not necessarily always be the same thing.
That said, I will do my best to give some advice:
I believe foreplay could be very helpful in your endeavor, extending it, and trying different things to make it more interesting. As just one of many possible ideas, maybe start in the shower, as a surprise ;), but don't go to the main event right there, even if he pushes for it, delay it, maybe continue the foreplay to the bedroom, lots of closeness, lots of touching, lots of kisses, building to you actually having sex, so that you are already up there when it starts, and you just go even higher from there. Change the game plan
I would also suggest plenty of oral/manual stimulation, for both partners, and meaningful stimulation, to heighten the pleasure to come, not just doing it because someone said you have to and you just want to gte it over with. Maybe try a mutual touching/masturbation, each of you with your hands on the other, with no words, just communicate as much as you can with touches and listening for reactions.
And yes, perhaps most of all, Communicate; Talk to your partner. You're there to have sex with each other, right? So BE there, be present in that moment, and look at each other, see each other, and smile, because this is enjoyable, this is something you both want to do! Don't just close your eyes and "do it" like it's another chore you plod through. Work together to make it engaging for both of you and it will make a more pleasurable and more fulfilling experience.
To answer your question, yes, he could be mistaking your kegels for an orgasm contraction. Have you said anything to him? I can imagine if the idea of that conversation maybe does not seem appealing, but I believe it may turn out to be more positive in the long run for you both if talk to him about it, and get him to work with you to make you cum!
You may also be interested in a translated and contextualized edition of the Kama Sutra if you're looking for ideas, the link for the PDF is below, just remove the spaces and the brackets around the "www" and "."
link (www) .barberb.net/twilight/New%20Folder/Kama%20Sutra%20(photo%20book) (.) pdf
Please feel free to shoot me a message if you have anything you'd like to ask me about, I want to do my best to help people on here, with whatever they need help with.
Good luck, and good f***ing ;)
I don't claim to be an expert in this or anything but did I read it right when you said "I do kegels a lot DURING sex"?
Young lady, I think you should be concentrating more on or rather allow me to rephrase that, you should be enjoying the pleasure in abandon rather than concentrating on 'how to orgasm' and doing 'exercises' during sex :)
I didn't mean to be rude or cynical but meant what I said :D
Most time orgasms are screwed up more psychologically than physiologically.
i do them because it feels better for me too lol the closest I get to having an orgasm is when I do them
try destressing yourself (maybe you are showing performance anxiety symptoms the way men do generally), relax and then try doing it w/o the kegel :) - maybe it will work (& somewhere I'm confident it will)
First of all you need to communicate this to your partner. He's just gonna keep doing what he does because he thinks it gets you off. But if you agree to experiment together then you two will eventually figure out how to do it for real :)
You should try masturbating on your own if you feel comfortable with that. If you already know how to get yourself off, it will be easier to add another person into the equation.
Also, the majority of women can't orgasm during intercourse alone. Most women need clitoral stimulation, or a toy of some sort.
Tips:
-make sure you're REALLY REALLY REALLY turned on. If you aren't super into it you probably won't be able to come.
-Relaaaaax. It took awhile for my partner to be able to get me off because I wasn't 100% comfortable with someone else touching my body at first, but once I gained that comfort and let myself enjoy it, problem solved!
-Either you or your partner could try stimulating your clitoris manually. Just make sure you're really lubricated down there or it won't be enjoyable. If your clit is too sensitive sometimes it feels better to just massage around the area.
But really, girl. You just have to experiment and find out what works for you. And I promise if you talk openly with your partner the path to having an orgasm will be a much shorter route!
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The clitoris is the only organ whose sole function is pleasure. The clitoris has 8000 nerve endings in the vagina has few nerve endings. Direct clitoral stimulation (by finger or tongue), almost all women leads to orgasm. During intercourse, the clitoris is stimulated indirectly. Penis moving inner lips, inner lips moving clitoral foreskin. and stimulated clitoris. Such stimulation is sufficient for 30% of women. For 70% of women is not enough. Clitoral stimulation during intercourse by finger always lead to orgasm. Deep fast breathing (0.8 seconds inhale and exhale) help to experience orgasm. Women are usually the second or third orgajam experience easier and faster than the first. Cunnilingus and orgasm at the beginning, then intercourse. Tell your boyfriend that you're not experienced orgajam and find the way to do it. Tantra is the best way
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The unfortunate truth is that many women under the age of 30 cannot have a vaginal orgasm from sexual intercourse alone. Try to let him give you oral sex and help him to find your G spot with his fingers. If he's skilled, this can be much more pleasurable than a regular vaginal orgasm! As Dragan said, the clitoris is mostly an external organ and isn't really stimulated by the penis itself. Rather, the man's pubic bone makes repeated contact with your clitoris during intercourse, providing
stimulation. Check out the kama sutra if you'd like, but your best bet might be to try missionary position with your ankles wrapped around his back. Doggy style can give you more depth of penetration which may or may not be enjoyable to you. Try getting on your knees and elbows so that your clitoris is more exposed to stimulation during intercourse. Lastly, a lot of women have the most luck in getting on top and having the man stay mostly still without thrusting. Try everything and find out!
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